When your child is being picked on?

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imnottired
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When your child is being picked on?

Unread post by imnottired »

Today, I took my kids to the splash pad. I noticed this kid, probably 8 or 9, absolutely terrorizing all of the kids there. He was hitting people, kicking people, and pouring water on people. His mom just sat at the edge of the park, watching, but not doing anything about it.

At one point, he punched a four year old. Another instance he picked up a two year old and ran through the water - while she was screaming and crying for him to stop. I also saw him grab a small child's arm and squeeze it until the child cried. A bunch of kids went up to his mom and asked her to do something about it, showing the MARKS her son had left on them, but she was like, "sorry" "he does this all the time to his little brother" and "just leave him alone".

I was following my one year old around (doesn't like the water that much) and my husband was watching our four year old. I did privately let my husband know about it, just so he was aware.

A while later, I was still following my son around the little area that's dry and this kid just runs up and dumps water on my one year old's head. I screamed "NO" and "STOP" as loud as I could. The kid laughed, and as he was running away, I picked my son up. (I really beat myself up over this. He was just an arms reach away and I still can't believe it happened.) It happened in front of his mom too and she didn't care. While we were packing to leave, she never came over to apologize or have her son apologize. I did hear her tell him that they were leaving, but they didn't leave.

I know it was just water, and it could've been so much worse, but the kid was doing it to pick on my son. What nine year old picks on a one year old?!? I don't like any kind of situation where there's bullying, and if my kid had done that, there would've been MAJOR consequences.

So, in the future, when something like this happens, what should I do? Next time should I talk to the parent? Leave like I did this time? How do you handle it when a parent isn't disciplining/parenting the child?
CanYouJustNot
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Re: When your child is being picked on?

Unread post by CanYouJustNot »

Sometimes people are just really awful parents. I think you did what was right in the situation. Where I'm from, someone probably would have said some pretty rude things to the parent/child, but I would have done the same thing as you. She had already been alerted to his behavior and refused to do anything about it. Maybe if a similar situation arises, next time go to the parent personally and tell her she needs to do something about her child or leave. The safety of a group of children shouldn't be compromised because of a larger, older child. Don't beat yourself up about it though. Sometimes people just suck and the best way to deal with it is to just leave.

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Vincere
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Re: When your child is being picked on?

Unread post by Vincere »

Sorry to hear that. A sensible thing might be to ask some employees to do something regarding that.
Another option, would be to ask your husband to scare the crap out of the bully. Not the most elegant but sometimes it serves them good.

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gypsophila
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Re: When your child is being picked on?

Unread post by gypsophila »

I have no good advice. I would have yelled at both the kid and his mother in front of the whole water park. I would have been swearing most likely too. I definitely would have gone off verbally on the kid. Is it the answer? I highly doubt it. But mess with my kid and you get me angry. In real life, I heard about this kid that kept hitting my daughter at school. I went to his house with my daughter in tow and basically yelled at his mother and told her to get him in anger management class. She said she already tried that. She died about 18 months later after her husband divorced her and her brain cancer became terminal. I think sometimes these kids might have more going on at home, and it could be telling. He may have an abusive dad or something. Talk to the kid, talk to the mom. Yelling probably isn't the way to go. ;)
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clashingpiglet
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Re: When your child is being picked on?

Unread post by clashingpiglet »

Confront the mother, tell her you notified the police and will be looking into assault charges. That should scare some sense into her

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clashingpiglet
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Re: When your child is being picked on?

Unread post by clashingpiglet »

clashingpiglet wrote:Confront the mother, tell her you notified the police and will be looking into assault charges. That should scare some sense into her

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It's been my experience that it will cause the parent of the terrorizing child to take their child and leave; just to avoid talking to the police

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