E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

[whys0seri0us]

I'm against cry it out completely, and I'm about 98% sure they let their kids cry longer than 5-10 minutes. Bonnie has said that she sleep trains from a fairly young age (the name of the book escapes me - "To train up a Child" or something similar?) and I'm sure that's a family thing that they all do. I just can't believe she has always just doted on Calvin but leaves him crying in his room all alone.

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Bonnie also practices blanket training, where you train an infant to stay on a blanket by hitting them or tapping them on some body part when they move off of it. I'm with you 100%. Children cry for a reason. I never let my son cry it out and he's a great kid and a great sleeper.

Not to mention, Ellie talks about rocking Calvin to sleep alllll the time. You can't rock your kid to sleep and also CIO, that's not fair to the kid.

[HelloSweetie]

I'm against cry it out completely, and I'm about 98% sure they let their kids cry longer than 5-10 minutes. Bonnie has said that she sleep trains from a fairly young age (the name of the book escapes me - "To train up a Child" or something similar?) and I'm sure that's a family thing that they all do. I just can't believe she has always just doted on Calvin but leaves him crying in his room all alone.

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Bonnie also practices blanket training, where you train an infant to stay on a blanket by hitting them or tapping them on some body part when they move off of it. I'm with you 100%. Children cry for a reason. I never let my son cry it out and he's a great kid and a great sleeper.

Not to mention, Ellie talks about rocking Calvin to sleep alllll the time. You can't rock your kid to sleep and also CIO, that's not fair to the kid.[/quote]

Bonnie never actually said she tapped them or hit them specifically though, I believe she said she put them back if they moved. There's a difference.

But I agree with your second paragraph, that is the same point I had.

I will say though, some kids you need to actually let cry sometimes. If they will cry for a minute or two and go to sleep then it might be necessary. My first was like this. My second child is more clingy like Calvin, and has a temper. No amount of crying in bed would ever get him to calm down and go to sleep. Different techniques work with different children. I don't think Ellie is consistent enough for CIO to even be arguably beneficial.

[Nothankyou]

So in today's vlog they say the girl painted something to represent all of them- Jared, Ellie, Penny, and Calvin. There was no mention of Jackson. The painting is adorable but to me, a painting for a 3 year old's gift is like giving him rock pillows.
Something else that caught my attention- she says Penny and Calvin were napping. You could hear Penny yelping and then you could here Calvin crying. Neither were napping.

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YES!! She's describing Jackson's gift and says there something here to represent all of us, the Dr. Pepper for Jared, the E&J and the title for Calvin. And completely leaves out Jackson.

I wonder if anything does represent him and because she always leaves him out didn't mention it, or maybe really nothing represents him on the gift that was meant to be for his birthday!


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[whys0seri0us]

I'm against cry it out completely, and I'm about 98% sure they let their kids cry longer than 5-10 minutes. Bonnie has said that she sleep trains from a fairly young age (the name of the book escapes me - "To train up a Child" or something similar?) and I'm sure that's a family thing that they all do. I just can't believe she has always just doted on Calvin but leaves him crying in his room all alone.

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Bonnie also practices blanket training, where you train an infant to stay on a blanket by hitting them or tapping them on some body part when they move off of it. I'm with you 100%. Children cry for a reason. I never let my son cry it out and he's a great kid and a great sleeper.

Not to mention, Ellie talks about rocking Calvin to sleep alllll the time. You can't rock your kid to sleep and also CIO, that's not fair to the kid.

Bonnie never actually said she tapped them or hit them specifically though, I believe she said she put them back if they moved. There's a difference.

But I agree with your second paragraph, that is the same point I had.

I will say though, some kids you need to actually let cry sometimes. If they will cry for a minute or two and go to sleep then it might be necessary. My first was like this. My second child is more clingy like Calvin, and has a temper. No amount of crying in bed would ever get him to calm down and go to sleep. Different techniques work with different children. I don't think Ellie is consistent enough for CIO to even be arguably beneficial.[/quote]

I know Bonnie SAYS she didn't hit them, but I don't think I believe that. How many times would you have to pick an INFANT up and put them back on the blanket for them to get it. I don't see Bonnie, or any person who think any form of blanket training is good for a child, having that amount of patience. Blanket training is sick in my eyes. It's called a fucking play pen, or a gated in area where a child can safely play. I'm sorry but when you have kids you can't just train to them to stay in one spot like a damn dog. I'm glad we never saw Ellie using any type of blanket training. I will say that I think they do spank. Ellie and Bonnie and all of that family.

[HelloSweetie]

I know Bonnie SAYS she didn't hit them, but I don't think I believe that. How many times would you have to pick an INFANT up and put them back on the blanket for them to get it. I don't see Bonnie, or any person who think any form of blanket training is good for a child, having that amount of patience. Blanket training is sick in my eyes. It's called a fucking play pen, or a gated in area where a child can safely play. I'm sorry but when you have kids you can't just train to them to stay in one spot like a damn dog. I'm glad we never saw Ellie using any type of blanket training. I will say that I think they do spank. Ellie and Bonnie and all of that family.

How do you teach a toddler to stay in a toddler bed then? By putting them back repeatedly. Anyone who has watched Supernanny has seen this technique used effectively. I'm just saying it's a lot to throw out that someone is hitting their child as though it is fact. I don't agree with Daily blanket training, and never felt the need to do it myself, but I see nothing wrong with teaching a child to have the ability to sit quietly when needed. You can't always gate kids in, and I believe blanket training is for children too old for a playpen.

Ellie has in fact mentioned wanting to do blanket training "like her sisters" before. Maybe someone else can remember which vlog it was.

[BlueMountains]

So in today's vlog they say the girl painted something to represent all of them- Jared, Ellie, Penny, and Calvin. There was no mention of Jackson. The painting is adorable but to me, a painting for a 3 year old's gift is like giving him rock pillows.
Something else that caught my attention- she says Penny and Calvin were napping. You could hear Penny yelping and then you could here Calvin crying. Neither were napping.

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YES!! She's describing Jackson's gift and says there something here to represent all of us, the Dr. Pepper for Jared, the E&J and the title for Calvin. And completely leaves out Jackson.

I wonder if anything does represent him and because she always leaves him out didn't mention it, or maybe really nothing represents him on the gift that was meant to be for his birthday!


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Who gives a 3 year old a painting as a gift though? Doesn't make sens

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[HelloSweetie]

So in today's vlog they say the girl painted something to represent all of them- Jared, Ellie, Penny, and Calvin. There was no mention of Jackson. The painting is adorable but to me, a painting for a 3 year old's gift is like giving him rock pillows.
Something else that caught my attention- she says Penny and Calvin were napping. You could hear Penny yelping and then you could here Calvin crying. Neither were napping.

Sent from my SM-G920V using Tapatalk

YES!! She's describing Jackson's gift and says there something here to represent all of us, the Dr. Pepper for Jared, the E&J and the title for Calvin. And completely leaves out Jackson.

I wonder if anything does represent him and because she always leaves him out didn't mention it, or maybe really nothing represents him on the gift that was meant to be for his birthday!


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Who gives a 3 year old a painting as a gift though? Doesn't make sens

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It sounds like he's getting a play kitchen as his gift. I think the mural is just an extra bit for fun.

It looks like the painter "friend" came all the way from AZ. I guess a few decals or stencils just wouldn't do

Remember when E&J used to pride themselves on living a simple life? I really liked them back then. Makes me wonder if YT changed them, or if tgey only liked the simple life because they couldn't afford more?

[RecklessDisregard]

I don't think blanket training is necessarily that bad, excluding any hitting of the child. I can see how it would be really helpful for a parent with multiple kids, who has to drag all the kids along for every doctor's visit, restaurant meal, church service, etc. It's logical, IMO, to create the expectation of sitting quietly and practice the skill for age-appropriate time periods.

I also agree with those who have said it's bizarre and confusing to intermittently leave Cal to CIO when we know Ellie usually rocks him to sleep. I don't really hate CIO altogether, though. I don't think there is any one ideal approach, because all kids are different.

And yeah, a painting is an odd gift for a 3 yr old. I get the idea that gifts don't have to be possessions and can understand E+J feeling like they already have enough plastic junk. I know a well-off family that goes on a trip to show their children a different part of the world every year instead of giving their children extravagant Christmas gifts - but their kids are not toddlers.

I bet Ellie doesn't get a painting representing Jared, Jackson, and Calvin for *her* birthday.

I definitely think their "minimalist" nature shown in earlier vlogs had to do with them making the best of limited funds rather than a true desire to live simple lives. I kinda can't fault them for that, though. I would upgrade the hell out of my circumstances if I were to strike it rich by whatever means.

[MissNova]

Holy wrinkles! It looks like a mask! [img]//uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/2017010 ... 4f806c.png[/img]


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This is excatley why I say their is no way they are in their 20's! I'm sticking with mid 30's and wouldn't be shocked if 20 years from now all the "we were you tube stars, behind the sceans, secrets and lies tell all books" start popping up..because we all know that when their channels fail to make money anymore they will all be desperate.
"DBEJCKswingervacay screats revealed!"

Sorry got off track there lol

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[freshbalsam]

Avoiding a long quote tree. As far as I know, Bonnie doesn't blanket train on infants, or her babies. I always thought she used it primarily for her toddlers where they are able to understand what she is asking/expecting of them.

It does look like Jackson is getting a kitchen for his birthday which I'm sure he's going to love! I can't pinpoint why, but I just don't really like the painting they did down there


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[just_me]

Her are Jared used Aunt Sonia's sickness to help sell their t-shirts promising to donate some of the money to her care. After the campaign was over, we never heard about the donation (or Aunt Sonia) again. I bought one of those t-shirts in part because of that. It was the beginning of my seeing E&J in a different light.

My point is that you need to be fairly insensitive to use a loved ones crisis to your own gain. They did this when Boston had his surgery as well.... and are doing it again with the IVF stories. They are borrowing others' pain to add entertainment to their vlogs. That's very insensitive IMO.

Plus if there was ever a moment we would see Ellie empathize, I would think it would have been when Jared was sad about Wrinkles. Or after watching Missy being sad during Finn's birth vlog. She called it hilarious. Even those of us "haters" from the DB board felt sorry for Missy that day. Funny it was not.[/quote]

Personal - This completely reminds me of my sister. When my grandma passed away almost 3 years ago, only my mom flew out for the funeral (nobody else could go due to work and/or money). My sister had already taken vacation days for the day before, day of, and day after the funeral for reasons I don't know. When she heard the funeral was right in the middle of her vacation days, she wanted my mom to provide her with a copy of the funeral program and a copy of our grandma's death certificate to show she went to the funeral so that she could get bereavement leave instead of having to use vacation pay. I know it wasn't the worst thing to do, but the fact she was using our grandma's death as a way to essentially get more vacation days really rubbed me the wrong way. Even my mom wasn't that happy about her wanting to do this. Instead of seeing how it looked (gaining something from her grandmother dying), she held a grudge and didn't talk to our mom (or me) for 3-6 months.

[tratra58]

Her are Jared used Aunt Sonia's sickness to help sell their t-shirts promising to donate some of the money to her care. After the campaign was over, we never heard about the donation (or Aunt Sonia) again. I bought one of those t-shirts in part because of that. It was the beginning of my seeing E&J in a different light.

My point is that you need to be fairly insensitive to use a loved ones crisis to your own gain. They did this when Boston had his surgery as well.... and are doing it again with the IVF stories. They are borrowing others' pain to add entertainment to their vlogs. That's very insensitive IMO.

Plus if there was ever a moment we would see Ellie empathize, I would think it would have been when Jared was sad about Wrinkles. Or after watching Missy being sad during Finn's birth vlog. She called it hilarious. Even those of us "haters" from the DB board felt sorry for Missy that day. Funny it was not.

Personal - This completely reminds me of my sister. When my grandma passed away almost 3 years ago, only my mom flew out for the funeral (nobody else could go due to work and/or money). My sister had already taken vacation days for the day before, day of, and day after the funeral for reasons I don't know. When she heard the funeral was right in the middle of her vacation days, she wanted my mom to provide her with a copy of the funeral program and a copy of our grandma's death certificate to show she went to the funeral so that she could get bereavement leave instead of having to use vacation pay. I know it wasn't the worst thing to do, but the fact she was using our grandma's death as a way to essentially get more vacation days really rubbed me the wrong way. Even my mom wasn't that happy about her wanting to do this. Instead of seeing how it looked (gaining something from her grandmother dying), she held a grudge and didn't talk to our mom (or me) for 3-6 months.[/quote]

She could get in a lot of trouble with her employer taking bereavement pay and not attending the funeral. This is really a honesty issue (stealing) and if I was the mother I wouldn't have given her the program and been disappointed in my adult child.

Ethics with health issues should be considered when asking for donations.


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[tratra58]

I don't think blanket training is necessarily that bad, excluding any hitting of the child. I can see how it would be really helpful for a parent with multiple kids, who has to drag all the kids along for every doctor's visit, restaurant meal, church service, etc. It's logical, IMO, to create the expectation of sitting quietly and practice the skill for age-appropriate time periods.

I also agree with those who have said it's bizarre and confusing to intermittently leave Cal to CIO when we know Ellie usually rocks him to sleep. I don't really hate CIO altogether, though. I don't think there is any one ideal approach, because all kids are different.

And yeah, a painting is an odd gift for a 3 yr old. I get the idea that gifts don't have to be possessions and can understand E+J feeling like they already have enough plastic junk. I know a well-off family that goes on a trip to show their children a different part of the world every year instead of giving their children extravagant Christmas gifts - but their kids are not toddlers.

I bet Ellie doesn't get a painting representing Jared, Jackson, and Calvin for *her* birthday.

I definitely think their "minimalist" nature shown in earlier vlogs had to do with them making the best of limited funds rather than a true desire to live simple lives. I kinda can't fault them for that, though. I would upgrade the hell out of my circumstances if I were to strike it rich by whatever means.

I think the birthdays before and after Christmas, it is hard time to give them more toys after giving them so many toys. I have heard kids state it isn't a fair deal, which is possible.

I thought the three owls was representing Jackson since he is 3? I also think he will get toys on his birthday from E+J, family and their 'friends.' I agree this mural painting is an odd gift since it really isn't a three year old gift. The painter did a wonderful job.

I don't think either of their kids lack material things and have traveled more than many American children and even adults. A YouTube kid birthday party appear to be a production or more elaborate due to being part of a vlog so my guess none of these kids will be disappointed. The questionable part is sharing it with strangers.


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[HelloSweetie]

I think the birthdays before and after Christmas, it is hard time to give them more toys after giving them so many toys. I have heard kids state it isn't a fair deal, which is possible.

I thought the three owls was representing Jackson since he is 3? I also think he will get toys on his birthday from E+J, family and their 'friends.' I agree this mural painting is an odd gift since it really isn't a three year old gift. The painter did a wonderful job.

I don't think either of their kids lack material things and have traveled more than many American children and even adults. A YouTube kid birthday party appear to be a production or more elaborate due to being part of a vlog so my guess none of these kids will be disappointed. The questionable part is sharing it with strangers.


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The Christmas thing might apply to most families, but I hardly think Jackson is running out of toy options for them. Jackson has more toys than he used to, but I still think Ellie's minimalist nature plays into what toys he can have and where he can have them. I think he's getting a play kitchen though, and if they buy him a lot of play food, that will give tons of present options. Melissa and Doug food in particular is not cheap and I think she'll do that.

While I agree that travel can be a blessing for children, they haven't gone on many trips that I would consider enriching for Jackson. Not lately anyway. He's at an age where play and toys are important to his development. They should already be including him in vacations if they are taking one, I don't see that as a justification for less material items.

I agree with you about the YT production though, and I hope you're right and Jackson has a nice little birthday including thoughtful gifts from his parents and brother. Maybe with something small that will be "just his" since the kitchen will obviously be for both of the boys.

[Pency]

Maybe this has been mentioned, but did anybody else think it was odd that the woman who painted the mural spent the night at Ellie and Jared's house two nights in a row and painted non-stop until it was done? When she was first there, Ellie mentioned that she had twins at home. Is she that dedicated to her work, or did Ellie give her an unrealistic deadline?

I just can't imagine a grown woman with a family spending two nights in a row away from her family. Seemed odd.

[Vincere]

The artist had to work for her bread. She can't just upload daily stupid videos and make tons of money, she actually has to produce something.

Is she going to put a kitchen inside covering all the artwork?! Also a kitchen, quite progressive of her??? Is Jackson the girl Ellie wanted?

Travelling: to mommy dearest (grandma) and back.
Plus they are Mormons when they travel they don't assimilate the different culture but they try to impose theirs. Kinda like barbaric people.

[HelloSweetie]

Maybe this has been mentioned, but did anybody else think it was odd that the woman who painted the mural spent the night at Ellie and Jared's house two nights in a row and painted non-stop until it was done? When she was first there, Ellie mentioned that she had twins at home. Is she that dedicated to her work, or did Ellie give her an unrealistic deadline?

I just can't imagine a grown woman with a family spending two nights in a row away from her family. Seemed odd.

Given that she was hired to do the job and E&J likely needed to pay her travel costs, of course they elected to put her up for free and feed her. You wouldn't want them to pay for a hotel and provide a food allowance would you?

When my husband travels for work he will work around the clock if need be to get his job done so he can get home. I don't find it odd that she did this at all. I would find it odd if I actually thought they were friends, but we already assume Ellie has none so when she says a "friend" I know she means the hired help.

[Vincere]

Actually I wish someone would email the artist and be:
OMG I saw your video on Ellie SO FUN. I want something exactly like that. How much does it cost?

But she seemed like a genuinely nice person and I wouldn't want to give her false hopes.
Just curios how much it cost. Anyone did something similar or has knowledge?

[marshmallowfluf]

I don't like the painting all that much. I thought it was just decals. And it looks like something that would be on the wall of a pediatricians office..


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[Pency]

Maybe this has been mentioned, but did anybody else think it was odd that the woman who painted the mural spent the night at Ellie and Jared's house two nights in a row and painted non-stop until it was done? When she was first there, Ellie mentioned that she had twins at home. Is she that dedicated to her work, or did Ellie give her an unrealistic deadline?

I just can't imagine a grown woman with a family spending two nights in a row away from her family. Seemed odd.

Given that she was hired to do the job and E&J likely needed to pay her travel costs, of course they elected to put her up for free and feed her. You wouldn't want them to pay for a hotel and provide a food allowance would you?

When my husband travels for work he will work around the clock if need be to get his job done so he can get home. I don't find it odd that she did this at all. I would find it odd if I actually thought they were friends, but we already assume Ellie has none so when she says a "friend" I know she means the hired help.

Honestly I didn't even consider that she didn't live within driving distance, so that makes sense.