E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by RecklessDisregard »

Aww, that was a nice birthday. Jackson is such a sweetheart. I'm glad Jared made the effort to assemble some clips for the birthday vlog, and they seemed to make it a special day for him.

Even when it's not overtly apparent, you can tell when Jared is filming (as opposed to Ellie) because he actually catches the other kids' faces instead of glossing over them. I had a chuckle at poor Boston during the Beanboozled challenge... That kid would eat every nasty bean with a thumbs-up and a smile as long as he was included!

Maybe I have just known too many poor kids growing up in difficult circumstances, but I wish all little kids could have a happy birthday like Jackson's. It wasn't a Lanning Present Extravaganza or a Calvin Cuddlefest, but it was nice, and I can see why even older kids watch this stuff and wish they could be part of the family. Hell, I'm in my thirties and sometimes my vlog-watching is aspirational in nature and tinged with some level of vicarious wish-fulfillment.

The anecdote about Calvin towards the end was interesting... Ellie said Calvin cries when they put him down and cries even harder if Jared walks into his room, but stops immediately for Ellie. I guess their preference for each other is mutual. I get that a lot of kids prefer one parent over the other, and some parents are able to connect with one kid more easily than the others, but Ellie + Calvin's relationship seems like a pretty extreme version of that. Honestly, having a kid caught up in that dynamic would be a real strain on my marriage.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by Playsinrain »

IceCreamCone wrote:
Playsinrain wrote:I want to add to the debate on whether Ellie favors Cal more than Jacks.. disclaimer: (lol) I only watch E&J mayyyybe once a week, sometimes less, sometimes more depending on what is being talked about here. So keep in mind that its harder for me to pick up on patterns ect with their behavior.
Just watching as infrequently as I do, the one thing that really disturbs me about Ellie is her lack in ability to praise Jackson when he deserves it. I've seen it several times but the most recent and the one that really scorched my hide is the vlog a few weeks back where they took the boys ice skating. I talked about it then as well, but look back at it if you really don't think she favors Calvin over Jackson. She REFUSES to talk about how well Jackson did and immediately turns it into Calvin being the best. While they are at the rink she gushes about how well Calvin did (the kid was in sneakers walking on the ice with a walker...) and throws in Jackson as an after thought (who was a natural at it like pretty much every physical activity he tries). "I want to come back when Calvin gets older." as in she cant just take Jackson since he is old enough and can really enjoy it, its GOT to be all about Calvin. Later, at the end of the vlog Jared starts talking about how great Jackson did and Ellie immediately turns the conversation on Calvin, he was just amazing bc he loves to talk to and kiss strangers.. She dismisses everything Jackson excels at and throws a freaking party for Calvin if he claps his hands. Maybe i don't watch enough to see her dote and brag on Jackson, but ive never really seen it. He does not get the praise he deserves from his mother, and that WILL be damaging to him as he gets older. Sure kids don't need a trophy for wiping their noses, but give a kid praise when he deserves it! We all know how everything has to be about Ellie.. all the time, and i have wondered if she see's Calvin as an extension of herself. If the attention cant be on her, then it better be on Calvin bc he's an extension of Ellie. Jackson has been pushed away for Calvin. Jackson will be trying to gain his mothers approval his entire life while Calvin won't have to lift a finger and will be the golden child bc Ellie has some weird attachment to him. All mothers should be attached to their children, yes, but when it the attachment is so strong that you start projecting your own issues on the to child it becomes an issue. Not only for the child but for siblings and partners too. I can see Ellie jumping on Jared off camera for giving Jackson too much praise.
Yes, this! 100% Jackson is treated like he's Jared's child, whereas Calvin is hers. His attention is HER attention too. Anytime Jackson gets any sort of recognition, she uses Calvin to steal the limelight away. This is a common tool of Narcissist mothers. Thing is, the Golden Child is easily replaceable, so if she gets her daughter, then Cal is going to find himself hanging out with his brother. At least then, Jackson might not grow up thinking it's just him.

Jared needs to grow a pair of balls and realize they don't need to bring anymore children or pets into that mess. He has his hands full raising his wife-child, two boys and now Penny. If something were to ever happen to him, or if he ever had to return to a 40 hr a week job, they would not be ok. Ellie can't handle life as an adult with two children. Not even close.
YES!! That's exactly how it feels, like Jackson is Jared's and Calvin is Ellie's. I feel like that when Calvin was born Ellie had a rough time (which i'm not shaming her on, I had a rough go with my second and i sympathize with anyone who has PPD. How she handled it is a whole other discussion about Mormon's and mental health) and she pushed Jackson away and on to his dad more. It happens with first kids, and i get it, but i feel like Ellie took it way too far. She forced that baby to grow up, and pushed him away emotionally (and physically) when Calvin was born.. I'm not a child life specialist, i havent taken any early child hood development classes, but maybe someone who has can help me out. At the age Jackson was when Calvin was born, are there emotional and cognitive developments that are being made between parent and child that could be damaged by her actions? Not asking for a diagnosis of course, but could someone with a little more background knowledge elaborate on that (or the lack there of)? It almost seems like that bond she had with Jackson before Calvin was born has been damaged and i wonder if there are some emotional milestones that were not hit or were "messed up" bc she pushed him away?
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by HelloSweetie »

RecklessDisregard wrote: The anecdote about Calvin towards the end was interesting... Ellie said Calvin cries when they put him down and cries even harder if Jared walks into his room, but stops immediately for Ellie. I guess their preference for each other is mutual. I get that a lot of kids prefer one parent over the other, and some parents are able to connect with one kid more easily than the others, but Ellie + Calvin's relationship seems like a pretty extreme version of that. Honestly, having a kid caught up in that dynamic would be a real strain on my marriage.
We have a situation similar to this with our youngest. He was a colicky baby and got used to me as his comfort item. As nice as it is to know he loves me, it also makes me feel a bit like I've failed him. He needs to have a relationship with his dad too. I can't be around all the time, and he needs to know he's ok with daddy. We work really hard at making sure we don't make this clinginess worse, and I think that's what Ellie is lacking. She isn't trying to rectify it because she doesn't see a problem with it. She encourages Calvin to need only her, and I don't think it's good for him, especially if they plan to have another baby and she's going to shut herself away again. It's time for Ellie and Jared to start doing separate "dates" with the boys so she can re-bond with Jackson and Jared can establish a better bond with Calvin.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by larissaledingham »

Utter speculation but are they maybe road tripping to California for bryans album release party since bryan said 'some special guests' are coming and they love the Pacifica so much, can't be long before the next DBEJCK winter vacay

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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by RecklessDisregard »

Sorry to post again so soon... But... Did they really not film Penny at all on Jackson's birthday??!

I mean, there are valid reasons why a puppy could get overwhelmed at a little kid's birthday party, but E+J have never hesitated to trot her out at gatherings.

Is she in the "doghouse" (garage) because of the broken vase?

I am not even particularly a fan of dogs and I found her absence bizarre.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by larissaledingham »

RecklessDisregard wrote:Sorry to post again so soon... But... Did they really not film Penny at all on Jackson's birthday??!

I mean, there are valid reasons why a puppy could get overwhelmed at a little kid's birthday party, but E+J have never hesitated to trot her out at gatherings.

Is she in the "doghouse" (garage) because of the broken vase?

I am not even particularly a fan of dogs and I found her absence bizarre.
She was at the window during the bean boozled bit

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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by MommaLindsey2 »

RecklessDisregard wrote:Sorry to post again so soon... But... Did they really not film Penny at all on Jackson's birthday??!

I mean, there are valid reasons why a puppy could get overwhelmed at a little kid's birthday party, but E+J have never hesitated to trot her out at gatherings.

Is she in the "doghouse" (garage) because of the broken vase?

I am not even particularly a fan of dogs and I found her absence bizarre.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by skyblueandblack »

I'm really not understanding why in the previous vlog so much time was spent on explaining plumbing stuff to us. Snore!

I also love that scene in which Ellie is doing that annoying thing she does where she looks around their McMansion and coos about it- and Jared says, "I love our little home." Little? Okay then.

When they were setting up Jackson's kitchen Ellie said something like "I'm going to be down here every night" and it made me think of the poster here who said Ellie would be sneaking down at night to nibble on the fake food. Too funny.

If I never have to hear the word Frankenstein as a verb again- id still have heard it too much.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by skyblueandblack »

Also- why are the Griffiths so into that half bun hairstyle? Ruby does it a lot as well- and did it for Shari's dance- and I am just not a fan.

It feels like a mainstream LDS take on the FLDS poof.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by workfromhomemom »

phie20 wrote:Seriously though, am I missing something?

Jackson got:
- the painting (which is for everyone)
- the kitchen (which is for everyone)
- a clock... A CLOCK.

Ehm... are they for real?
I hope I missed something.
A clock really? Why didn't anyone get Jackson any play food to go with his kitchen? I know he got Ellie's old crap, but play food is what makes a kitchen fun. I couldn't make it all the way through the video. I just can hardly stand Ellie's voice anymore. They will probably be like DBs to me soon, who I can't stomach but just read about on here.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by skyblueandblack »

workfromhomemom wrote:
phie20 wrote:Seriously though, am I missing something?

Jackson got:
- the painting (which is for everyone)
- the kitchen (which is for everyone)
- a clock... A CLOCK.

Ehm... are they for real?
I hope I missed something.
A clock really? Why didn't anyone get Jackson any play food to go with his kitchen? I know he got Ellie's old crap, but play food is what makes a kitchen fun. I couldn't make it all the way through the video. I just can hardly stand Ellie's voice anymore. They will probably be like DBs to me soon, who I can't stomach but just read about on here.
I believe Bonnie got him a bunch of Melissa and Doug food.

And yeah the clock is great... but just as an everyday purchase. Not as a 3 year olds birthday gift.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by Playsinrain »

workfromhomemom wrote:
phie20 wrote:Seriously though, am I missing something?

Jackson got:
- the painting (which is for everyone)
- the kitchen (which is for everyone)
- a clock... A CLOCK.

Ehm... are they for real?
I hope I missed something.
A clock really? Why didn't anyone get Jackson any play food to go with his kitchen? I know he got Ellie's old crap, but play food is what makes a kitchen fun. I couldn't make it all the way through the video. I just can hardly stand Ellie's voice anymore. They will probably be like DBs to me soon, who I can't stomach but just read about on here.
Bc that play food is Ellie's play food, Jackson doesn't need anything more than his mothers hand me downs. I get that it's sweet and cute, but someone could have added too it. Heaven forbid someone get him some other food and he like it better than Ellie's. Whatever was good enough for mom is good enough for him. Jackson should feel blessed that Ellie allows him to play with it.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by Playsinrain »

That play kitchen was $699 btw...
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by calliepaige »

Playsinrain wrote:That play kitchen was $699 btw...
Holy eff. Whyyyyyyyyy


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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by staceyeileen »

workfromhomemom wrote:
phie20 wrote:Seriously though, am I missing something?

Jackson got:
- the painting (which is for everyone)
- the kitchen (which is for everyone)
- a clock... A CLOCK.

Ehm... are they for real?
I hope I missed something.
A clock really? Why didn't anyone get Jackson any play food to go with his kitchen? I know he got Ellie's old crap, but play food is what makes a kitchen fun. I couldn't make it all the way through the video. I just can hardly stand Ellie's voice anymore. They will probably be like DBs to me soon, who I can't stomach but just read about on here.
They got him the Melissa & Doug pizza party set, pots & pans for the kitchen, and plastic plates/cups/etc. And the clock. Ellie also brought out a box of the old play food that she used as a kid.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by skyblueandblack »

Playsinrain wrote:That play kitchen was $699 btw...
I love the sink oven part of these high end wooden kitchens- but I always end up feeling like the refridgeraters look just like a simple cabinet. I feel like if you are going to go for that simple look- why not consider having someone local make one of the cute painted pinteresty type ones- out of an old piece of furniture. (If you spend a lot of time on pinterest looking at kids stuff- you've seen this DIY style.)

I felt the same way about Ollie's kitchen.

I always feel like why not something like this one and its only 150- and IMO- just as nice as the 700.00 one they got.

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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by Playsinrain »

calliepaige84 wrote:
Playsinrain wrote:That play kitchen was $699 btw...
Holy eff. Whyyyyyyyyy


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yeahhhh thats what i said... Pottery Barn Kids..
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by Playsinrain »

skyblueandblack wrote:
Playsinrain wrote:That play kitchen was $699 btw...
I love the sink oven part of these high end wooden kitchens- but I always end up feeling like the refridgeraters look just like a simple cabinet. I feel like if you are going to go for that simple look- why not consider having someone local make one of the cute painted pinteresty type ones- out of an old piece of furniture. (If you spend a lot of time on pinterest looking at kids stuff- you've seen this DIY style.)

I felt the same way about Ollie's kitchen.

I always feel like why not something like this one and its only 150- and IMO- just as nice as the 700.00 one they got.

Image
I actually like that one better! It has more features and looks like a real kitchen vs the cabinet look you are talking about.
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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by winniewise »

skyblueandblack wrote:Also- why are the Griffiths so into that half bun hairstyle? Ruby does it a lot as well- and did it for Shari's dance- and I am just not a fan.

It feels like a mainstream LDS take on the FLDS poof.
I was wondering the same thing! Especially when Ellie did her neice Anne's hair like that for church! She kept talking about how she was so excited to do a little girl's hair, I thought she was showing the before look, not the after! That is so funny!

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Re: E+E - It's all about ME! Part 20

Unread post by winniewise »

Also why do they think it's cute to line kids up on the floor to eat? No one was at the table when the kids were eating pizza.

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