Bonnie and Joel: Not Every Day Is A Rational Day (Part 9)

[RootBeerFloatie]

I came to say that I thought the funeral footage was done tastefully and respectfully, but then I thought about it more and realized that I do have a problem with it. Instead of being in the moment, Bonnie was walking around trying to film perfect shots for her montage, and zooming in on the kids grieving was a little much.

All in all, though I think she did the best job I've seen at keeping the footage tasteful, the camera needs to be put away. We don't know if the other family members were comfortable with their grief being broadcasted like that. I think that she should have been focusing more on her family and remembering her aunt, and less on what was happening in her viewfinder.

[tratra58]

I came to say that I thought the funeral footage was done tastefully and respectfully, but then I thought about it more and realized that I do have a problem with it. Instead of being in the moment, Bonnie was walking around trying to film perfect shots for her montage, and zooming in on the kids grieving was a little much.

All in all, though I think she did the best job I've seen at keeping the footage tasteful, the camera needs to be put away. We don't know if the other family members were comfortable with their grief being broadcasted like that. I think that she should have been focusing more on her family and remembering her aunt, and less on what was happening in her viewfinder.

They all looked very comfortable in front of the camera. I think they did their grieving off camera since the vlogs are showing families memories of their aunt and visiting with each other. The clips of their children were short and nonintrusive.

[HashtagBlessed]

I think Bonnie handled her aunt's passing and the funeral tastefully. However, the fact that they vlogged and used the footage of Olivia having a meltdown at Claire's has to be some of the worst judgement they've ever exhibited at vloggers. That is completely unfair to their daughter to post that on the internet. What a betrayal of her privacy. She's obviously a sensitive little girl who was having a moment, like we all have had at that age, and now it's on YouTube. It's gross and exploitative. I was shocked that Bonnie's mom was the voice of reason and was the one who had to tell Bonnie that Olivia is a little girl who got scared. Bonnie thought Olivia was being "naughty" to the employees and seemed peeved that they paid for two sets of earrings. They make a fortune off of exploiting their kids on YouTube, so two cheap pairs of Claire's earrings isn't breaking the bank. Wouldn't a normal person leave after 5 minutes of watching their kid cry like that and try again when she's older? I was 13 when I got my ears pierced. If she's not old enough to sit still and understand and accept the process, she's not old enough to get her ears pierced. Letting her go back and forth on it and trying to hold her down just seems like a bad idea. Wait until she's mature enough to handle it.

[HelloSweetie]

I came to say that I thought the funeral footage was done tastefully and respectfully, but then I thought about it more and realized that I do have a problem with it. Instead of being in the moment, Bonnie was walking around trying to film perfect shots for her montage, and zooming in on the kids grieving was a little much.

All in all, though I think she did the best job I've seen at keeping the footage tasteful, the camera needs to be put away. We don't know if the other family members were comfortable with their grief being broadcasted like that. I think that she should have been focusing more on her family and remembering her aunt, and less on what was happening in her viewfinder.

I agree. Filming takes you out of the moment, even if it's just a parent filming their child's first time riding a bike, or a dance performance. I think this disconnect can be seen in a lot of family vlogs.

I often wonder if this is why some YTers don't see behavioural issues. Like when Calvin kept knocking over Jackson's Legos and Jared thought it was funny. Maybe he would have seen it differently had he been focusing on his child's sad face and not the "money-making shot" of a cute toddler as much?

[lmmomSD]

I came to say that I thought the funeral footage was done tastefully and respectfully, but then I thought about it more and realized that I do have a problem with it. Instead of being in the moment, Bonnie was walking around trying to film perfect shots for her montage, and zooming in on the kids grieving was a little much.

All in all, though I think she did the best job I've seen at keeping the footage tasteful, the camera needs to be put away. We don't know if the other family members were comfortable with their grief being broadcasted like that. I think that she should have been focusing more on her family and remembering her aunt, and less on what was happening in her viewfinder.

I agree. Filming takes you out of the moment, even if it's just a parent filming their child's first time riding a bike, or a dance performance. I think this disconnect can be seen in a lot of family vlogs.

I often wonder if this is why some YTers don't see behavioural issues. Like when Calvin kept knocking over Jackson's Legos and Jared thought it was funny. Maybe he would have seen it differently had he been focusing on his child's sad face and not the "money-making shot" of a cute toddler as much?

This makes me crazy. They really don't live in the moment. Bratayley was just at the Grand Canyon. And they were doing Music.allys. The Grand Canyon! I honestly think that had something to do with the drama over the ear piercing too. Not just that they wanted to get it done, but that they wanted it for the vlog. So not only was Olivia having a public meltdown, and "ruining" their fun night out, she messed up the "Olivia Gets Her Ears Pierced" vlog. But I think the same about vlogging at the funeral itself. She needed to be in the moment for herself and her mom and cousins, not be focused on getting good footage.

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[RecklessDisregard]

I would not like it AT ALL if one of my family members showed up at a funeral with a camera in hand to film some daily footage for their "job." And it does seem like Joel's side of the family put the smackdown on Bonnie's intention to vlog extensively at Joel's grandma's funeral. But generally I accept that both narcissism and exhibitionism run deep in the Griffiths family and they were probably, as a family unit, fine with having the funeral filmed by multiple family members.

I don't think I am explaining myself very well. In a nutshell, I would hate to have sensitive moments of my life posted to YouTube for -someone else- to earn income from. But I also really like seeing the details of how other people live. As a kid/teen this manifested in evening walks around the neighborhood; as a college student, I loved looking in other peoples' dorm rooms; and now as an adult I like to watch YouTubers. I guess my interest in the minutiae of other existences outweighs the sense that they shouldn't film or profit from certain events, and generally I only draw the line at blatant abuse/neglect or material that makes its way into kiddie porn collections.

In this one area, the celebration of life that seems to be a big focus in these Mormon funerals, Bonnie's family seems to be handling it in an altogether healthier way than what I am accustomed to (still alien though). It would never cross my mind to gather around a casket for a photo shoot, and nobody laughs or is at all pleasant at funerals I have been to. It's just interesting to observe.

[Vincere]

Super behind the topic, but I was blocked from her twitter when I called her out for begging Airbnb for free accommodation.

[lmmomSD]

This is absolutely apropos of nothing. I was looking at thumbnails and came across "Joel's Golden Birthday". A golden anniversary is 50 years. Joel turned 31. What is a "golden birthday"? I didn't have time to sit down and watch.

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[Vincere]

This is absolutely apropos of nothing. I was looking at thumbnails and came across "Joel's Golden Birthday". A golden anniversary is 50 years. Joel turned 31. What is a "golden birthday"? I didn't have time to sit down and watch.

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I think it might be related to golden shower+birthday= golden birthday.

[kathpt]

This is absolutely apropos of nothing. I was looking at thumbnails and came across "Joel's Golden Birthday". A golden anniversary is 50 years. Joel turned 31. What is a "golden birthday"? I didn't have time to sit down and watch.

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I think it might be related to golden shower+birthday= golden birthday.

err... that is disgusting.

A golden bday is when someone turns the same age as the day they're celebrating their bday on. Eg: he turned 31 years old on the 31st - golden bday. I turned 3 on the 3rd - golden bday.

[Vincere]

This is absolutely apropos of nothing. I was looking at thumbnails and came across "Joel's Golden Birthday". A golden anniversary is 50 years. Joel turned 31. What is a "golden birthday"? I didn't have time to sit down and watch.

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I think it might be related to golden shower+birthday= golden birthday.

err... that is disgusting.

A golden bday is when someone turns the same age as the day they're celebrating their bday on. Eg: he turned 31 years old on the 31st - golden bday. I turned 3 on the 3rd - golden bday.

Wait until he will celebrate his brown b-day.

[JM16Canada]

Shouldn't Boston (and even Cody) still be in car seats? Especially for over a 3 hour drive?


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[HelloSweetie]

Shouldn't Boston (and even Cody) still be in car seats? Especially for over a 3 hour drive?


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Absolutely. They usually have appropriate seats in the Suburban, but not in the car. They've been pulled over on the highway before though and the officer never said anything about the child seats. UT seems different....

It did look like they were all in boosters in today's vlog though going by the belt paths and the height the boys were at.

[menehune]

Edited: Sorry, wrong board!

[tratra58]

[img]I don't think I am explaining myself very well. In a nutshell, I would hate to have sensitive moments of my life posted to YouTube for -someone else- to earn income from. But I also really like seeing the details of how other people live. As a kid/teen this manifested in evening walks around the neighborhood; as a college student, I loved looking in other peoples' dorm rooms; and now as an adult I like to watch YouTubers. I guess my interest in the minutiae of other existences outweighs the sense that they shouldn't film or profit from certain events, and generally I only draw the line at blatant abuse/neglect or material that makes its way into kiddie porn collections.

In this one area, the celebration of life that seems to be a big focus in these Mormon funerals, Bonnie's family seems to be handling it in an altogether healthier way than what I am accustomed to (still alien though). It would never cross my mind to gather around a casket for a photo shoot, and nobody laughs or is at all pleasant at funerals I have been to. It's just interesting to observe.

I agree entirely with your message. I wrap my opinions by saying it is interesting to see different parts of the United States families and the beautiful scenery in Utah. I have never meet a family like the Griffiths and I think while they are different, really different at times, they are not all together bad. To me this funeral spoke to America with men in their cowboy hats, family catching up in conversation with each other and gathering around a casket on a cold wintery day at a burial site that had an industrial background. The flowers were beautiful and for those who never had to pick out a casket, I am still amazed how you pick them out in a room with many models to choose from which can be very expensive.

The idea woman from their church made hundreds of bag lunches was touching. I see this too in our area where volunteers from a church puts together a meal after a funeral. What has changed today is woman working and with the older generation no longer here, the volunteer help needed is harder to find. I image in Utah where moms stay at home and the strong volunteer nature with the Mormon church, this is not an issue.

I had more trouble with the profit issue and filming with the IVF contest. However, I sat and watched each of their contestants compelling story. A bit hypocritical if you ask me on my part.

[Nini12]

That's the thing about vlogging, while they're trying to capture this moments they're losing their chance of experiencing what is happening, in some cases it can be something that isn't really important (i.e. Lincoln making cute faces) but there are others that just happen on time like the kids taking their first steps or stuff like family holidays. I always think of how many photos or holidays the DBEJCK crew have together and the kids will probably have no contact when they grow up. I get that some things are done because they want to be friendly, like Samika sending valentine cards to other vlogger families but I guess that part of their job, I would imagine a 10 year old Brooks asking why a woman from Utah sent him a Valentine card all the way to Alabama .

And about filming Aunt Sonya's funeral, I wouldn't do it because you never know if someone is feeling uncomfortable, why even film it? But then again, after seeing the Bratayley family keep vlogging themselves after they lost their teenage kid and how they also live streamed his memorial service, nothing surprises me anymore.

[lmmomSD]

This is absolutely apropos of nothing. I was looking at thumbnails and came across "Joel's Golden Birthday". A golden anniversary is 50 years. Joel turned 31. What is a "golden birthday"? I didn't have time to sit down and watch.

Sent from my XT1080 using Tapatalk

I think it might be related to golden shower+birthday= golden birthday.

err... that is disgusting.

A golden bday is when someone turns the same age as the day they're celebrating their bday on. Eg: he turned 31 years old on the 31st - golden bday. I turned 3 on the 3rd - golden bday.

Thanks.

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[tratra58]

That's the thing about vlogging, while they're trying to capture this moments they're losing their chance of experiencing what is happening, in some cases it can be something that isn't really important (i.e. Lincoln making cute faces) but there are others that just happen on time like the kids taking their first steps or stuff like family holidays. I always think of how many photos or holidays the DBEJCK crew have together and the kids will probably have no contact when they grow up. I get that some things are done because they want to be friendly, like Samika sending valentine cards to other vlogger families but I guess that part of their job, I would imagine a 10 year old Brooks asking why a woman from Utah sent him a Valentine card all the way to Alabama .

And about filming Aunt Sonya's funeral, I wouldn't do it because you never know if someone is feeling uncomfortable, why even film it? But then again, after seeing the Bratayley family keep vlogging themselves after they lost their teenage kid and how they also live streamed his memorial service, nothing surprises me anymore.

I image that is the harder parts of vlogging is you are always thinking I should have filmed this moment for their viewers and we've heard them say this. I supposed they've become so desensitized to the daily life with vlogging they don't even noticed or have loose and relaxed boundaries with when/what they vlog that would leave some to question. They have to keep in mind they need vlog fresh and interesting content in order to keep viewers much like the television and entertainment industry. The thing that is changing is the kids are watching more now. It is a weird job.

I believe Bonnie at least ask their family if they are ok with filming parts of this day. The reason I think this is Joel's family opposition to filming his grandmother's funeral after asking.

[RecklessDisregard]

It's not really the same thing, but in my 20s I wrote a daily blog, often scattered with pictures or videos, which detailed the minutiae of my own life through my first adult relationship (which I believed was the love of my life), several jobs and promotions, moving from here to there, meeting my husband and bonding with my stepgirl, etc. Within a few short years, I came to deeply value that record of my life. I can certainly remember the high points without a written reminder, but it was really heartwarming to be able to look back after half a decade to read a description of the first conversation I ever had with my husband, or to see my own thoughts as recorded on 9/11/2001, etc.

I will never in a million years believe any daily vlogger who says they film "for the memories," and I agree to a certain extent with those here who have said that you can't be living 100% in the moment if you are worried about camera angles, "telling a story" to your viewers, etc. But these family vloggers have an unparalleled opportunity in terms of remembering every precious details of their children as infants and toddlers, and being able to generally look back on a life well-lived. They will also have the BEST montages at graduations, wedding, funerals, etc. Between that and the substantial income that can be earned, I understand why it's worthwhile for them to vlog.

[HelloSweetie]

It's not really the same thing, but in my 20s I wrote a daily blog, often scattered with pictures or videos, which detailed the minutiae of my own life through my first adult relationship (which I believed was the love of my life), several jobs and promotions, moving from here to there, meeting my husband and bonding with my stepgirl, etc. Within a few short years, I came to deeply value that record of my life. I can certainly remember the high points without a written reminder, but it was really heartwarming to be able to look back after half a decade to read a description of the first conversation I ever had with my husband, or to see my own thoughts as recorded on 9/11/2001, etc.

I will never in a million years believe any daily vlogger who says they film "for the memories," and I agree to a certain extent with those here who have said that you can't be living 100% in the moment if you are worried about camera angles, "telling a story" to your viewers, etc. But these family vloggers have an unparalleled opportunity in terms of remembering every precious details of their children as infants and toddlers, and being able to generally look back on a life well-lived. They will also have the BEST montages at graduations, wedding, funerals, etc. Between that and the substantial income that can be earned, I understand why it's worthwhile for them to vlog.

I mostly agree, except a lot of vloggers like DB and E&J are focusing on themselves most of the time and not even capturing the cute moments with their kids.

I think this is why Bonnie's vlogs still feel like home movies to me at times, while most others rarely do.