Bonnie and Joel: Kidses Family Vacation (Part 10)

Unread post by **natalka81** » Fri Apr 28, 2017 4:05 pm

I actually really liked the way they handled Cody's birthday. I'm probably in the minority here but I don't think getting him a present was completely necessary. He got something from his grandparents, he had a cake, and he got a trip to water world or whatever it was called. I think it's really nice to show kids that presents come in many forms. There's way too much stuff in this world- in my opinion.

In response to Bonnie's comment, I do think it sounds very self-absorbed and problematic, but I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest that possibly it's worded poorly because she really doesn't have a good handle on sentence structure and writing in general. It may sound ridiculous, but I somehow think she might mean something more along the lines of how much joy/love Cody has brought into her life. Yes, I could be stretching it, yes, I'm kind of defending her, and no, I wouldn't do the same if it were Ellie because even though she too has poor writing skills I think if she said this she'd probably mean it (and tbh I just don't think she's a very nice person). So while there are things about Bonnie that isn't perfect, I may be inclined to give her the benefit of the doubt on this one...

Unread post by **natalka81** » Fri Apr 28, 2017 4:06 pm

natalka81 wrote:I actually really liked the way they handled Cody's birthday. I'm probably in the minority here but I don't think getting him a present was completely necessary. He got something from his grandparents, he had a cake, and he got a trip to water world or whatever it was called. I think it's really nice to show kids that presents come in many forms. There's way too much stuff in this world- in my opinion.

In response to Bonnie's comment, I do think it sounds very self-absorbed and problematic, but I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest that possibly it's worded poorly because she really doesn't have a good handle on sentence structure and writing in general. It may sound ridiculous, but I somehow think she might mean something more along the lines of how much joy/love Cody has brought into her life. Yes, I could be stretching it, yes, I'm kind of defending her, and no, I wouldn't do the same if it were Ellie because even though she too has poor writing skills I think if she said this she'd probably mean it (and tbh I just don't think she's a very nice person). So while there are things about Bonnie that aren't perfect, I may be inclined to give her the benefit of the doubt on this one...

Unread post by **tratra58** » Fri Apr 28, 2017 4:17 pm

alym0326 wrote:My issue with the birthday situation is that Joel didn't want to get him a present (let's be real here, this ones on Joel - getting him a present was Bonnie's idea, she ran it by Joel and he said no - that the water park was his present). It seems that doing fun stuff and adventures was the priority(which is still great, I'm so glad they aren't just sitting around watching movies like they do at home) and codys birthday was an afterthought - hence Bonnie saying "oh shoot, we don't have a present - should we go get him a present" not that they forgot his birthday obviously just that with all the adventures, celebrating HIM wasn't the priority.

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You are right about Joel being the deciding factor for a present. You can't have a fun day adventure and a birthday present? I guess it is just something we've always done is plan a party (with their friends) and we gave a gift at this age. They are generous at Christmas with gifts and shown other birthday vlogs with gifts so this was a surprise to see this.

Unread post by **HelloSweetie** » Fri Apr 28, 2017 4:28 pm

If he had a present at home I really don't see what the big deal is. We've travelled on our son's birthday before, and didn't give him a card (kids don't care abut cards

) or a gift right then. We gave him gifts before or after at home. It's really not that big of a deal. Cody picked an activity that it sounds like they otherwise weren't going to do. It would have been over $250 for he family, and that's a pretty good gift! I could see not wanting to spend additional money on something else just to have something to give him that day, especially if his gift at home is something that's also big.

I've seen a lot of other vlogger birthdays where the kids get tons of gifts, but otherwise are more or less ignored on their birthday. They asked if Cody had felt special that day, and that's really all that matters.

Fri Apr 28, 2017 5:16 pm

HelloSweetie wrote:If he had a present at home I really don't see what the big deal is. We've travelled on our son's birthday before, and didn't give him a card (kids don't care abut cards ) or a gift right then. We gave him gifts before or after at home. It's really not that big of a deal. Cody picked an activity that it sounds like they otherwise weren't going to do. It would have been over $250 for he family, and that's a pretty good gift! I could see not wanting to spend additional money on something else just to have something to give him that day, especially if his gift at home is something that's also big.

I've seen a lot of other vlogger birthdays where the kids get tons of gifts, but otherwise are more or less ignored on their birthday. They asked if Cody had felt special that day, and that's really all that matters.

Seriously lol. He has a gift at home! I'm confused why it matters that it wasn't on the day.

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Unread post by **alym0326** » Fri Apr 28, 2017 5:49 pm

PostyMcPosterston wrote:
HelloSweetie wrote:If he had a present at home I really don't see what the big deal is. We've travelled on our son's birthday before, and didn't give him a card (kids don't care abut cards ) or a gift right then. We gave him gifts before or after at home. It's really not that big of a deal. Cody picked an activity that it sounds like they otherwise weren't going to do. It would have been over $250 for he family, and that's a pretty good gift! I could see not wanting to spend additional money on something else just to have something to give him that day, especially if his gift at home is something that's also big.

I've seen a lot of other vlogger birthdays where the kids get tons of gifts, but otherwise are more or less ignored on their birthday. They asked if Cody had felt special that day, and that's really all that matters.
Seriously lol. He has a gift at home! I'm confused why it matters that it wasn't on the day.

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My problem has zero to do with him not getting a gift and more how they handled it.

KWIM?

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Fri Apr 28, 2017 5:53 pm

alym0326 wrote:
PostyMcPosterston wrote:
HelloSweetie wrote:If he had a present at home I really don't see what the big deal is. We've travelled on our son's birthday before, and didn't give him a card (kids don't care abut cards ) or a gift right then. We gave him gifts before or after at home. It's really not that big of a deal. Cody picked an activity that it sounds like they otherwise weren't going to do. It would have been over $250 for he family, and that's a pretty good gift! I could see not wanting to spend additional money on something else just to have something to give him that day, especially if his gift at home is something that's also big.

I've seen a lot of other vlogger birthdays where the kids get tons of gifts, but otherwise are more or less ignored on their birthday. They asked if Cody had felt special that day, and that's really all that matters.
Seriously lol. He has a gift at home! I'm confused why it matters that it wasn't on the day.

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My problem has zero to do with him not getting a gift and more how they handled it.

KWIM?

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I guess. I'm going to have to just accept that I don't understand, but that doesn't mean you guys are all wrong, because obviously a lot of people are not cool with the situation, so there must be something to it.

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Unread post by **IceCreamCone** » Fri Apr 28, 2017 6:58 pm

What is the big deal about the way they handled Cody's birthday? They had a day all about him, and made sure to do an activity that HE wanted to do. If they were at home, he would have had a day at school, and would probably wait to do his birthday on Saturday anyway. It's really not that big of a deal if they have a gift for him at home. I mean, it's not like they put his birthday on hold until they got back.

Unread post by **menehune** » Fri Apr 28, 2017 7:02 pm

PostyMcPosterston wrote:
HelloSweetie wrote:If he had a present at home I really don't see what the big deal is. We've travelled on our son's birthday before, and didn't give him a card (kids don't care abut cards ) or a gift right then. We gave him gifts before or after at home. It's really not that big of a deal. Cody picked an activity that it sounds like they otherwise weren't going to do. It would have been over $250 for he family, and that's a pretty good gift! I could see not wanting to spend additional money on something else just to have something to give him that day, especially if his gift at home is something that's also big.

I've seen a lot of other vlogger birthdays where the kids get tons of gifts, but otherwise are more or less ignored on their birthday. They asked if Cody had felt special that day, and that's really all that matters.
Seriously lol. He has a gift at home! I'm confused why it matters that it wasn't on the day.

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Glad I'm not the only one that was confused! The best I could figure was that the OP missed the part where Bonnie said they had a gift at home, and the rest of the people were going off the description that he hadn't got one.

I just don't see what the big deal is.

Unread post by **alym0326** » Fri Apr 28, 2017 9:02 pm

IceCreamCone wrote:What is the big deal about the way they handled Cody's birthday? They had a day all about him, and made sure to do an activity that HE wanted to do. If they were at home, he would have had a day at school, and would probably wait to do his birthday on Saturday anyway. It's really not that big of a deal if they have a gift for him at home. I mean, it's not like they put his birthday on hold until they got back.

I meant like talking in front of Cody about whether or not he was getting a present from him and that there originally talk about getting him something but Joel shut it down. Cody didn't seem upset about it at all, which is great. It was just odd. My negative feeling about it may also be pushed more because of her ridiculously self centred instagram post. That makes me the most mad and what I think should be discussed over the whole gift thing.

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Unread post by **lmmomSD** » Fri Apr 28, 2017 10:15 pm

I think Cody felt celebrated, and since he had a present from his grandfather to open, I think he was pretty happy. She did make a point of NOT saying she w was disappointed in the water park in front of Cody, which was good. She may have some self-centered tendencies, but she definitely loves her kids and I think that out of the sisters we see regularly, her kids have the best chance of growing up well adjusted. I don't see Julie, so I don't know how she treats her kids. That IG post was absolutely worded weird. I don't know if it was really self centered or if Bonnie just can't write a simple declarative sentence and express her feelings coherently.

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Unread post by **Scar2016** » Sat Apr 29, 2017 4:36 am

lmmomSD wrote:I think Cody felt celebrated, and since he had a present from his grandfather to open, I think he was pretty happy. She did make a point of NOT saying she w was disappointed in the water park in front of Cody, which was good. She may have some self-centered tendencies, but she definitely loves her kids and I think that out of the sisters we see regularly, her kids have the best chance of growing up well adjusted. I don't see Julie, so I don't know how she treats her kids. That IG post was absolutely worded weird. I don't know if it was really self centered or if Bonnie just can't write a simple declarative sentence and express her feelings coherently.

I would wager it's a combination of bth. In the windmill vlog hike when Olivia was remarking on something Bonnie said ''I like where your mind thinks,'' which is like saying ''I like the way your mind goes'' Essentially mixing up and transposing two separate statements.

Unread post by **tratra58** » Sat Apr 29, 2017 4:55 am

lmmomSD wrote:I think Cody felt celebrated, and since he had a present from his grandfather to open, I think he was pretty happy. She did make a point of NOT saying she w was disappointed in the water park in front of Cody, which was good. She may have some self-centered tendencies, but she definitely loves her kids and I think that out of the sisters we see regularly, her kids have the best chance of growing up well adjusted. I don't see Julie, so I don't know how she treats her kids. That IG post was absolutely worded weird. I don't know if it was really self centered or if Bonnie just can't write a simple declarative sentence and express her feelings coherently.

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I think you are right Bonnie loves her children and this is true with moms. However, over time I have question if she puts herself in front of her kids or if this is the culture of their area. But Bonnie does and has change from earlier vlogs with where she films (in bathrooms) and even discipline she backtrack with the influence of viewer comments. Lately, I just see a more in your face type comments by Bonnie on the vlogs regarding pulling them out of school for this trip, their breakfast choices and teasing the kids. Did she or Joel need to include the clip with the teacher's disapproval of their vacation, or the breakfast with pop and a kid eating sea weed. It just brings more attention to herself and questionable parental decisions where many wouldn't agree with her. I keep wondering if she is playing a game with the viewers or why does she do this? I am seeing more similarities with the Griffith sisters than differences and that is what I expect growing up with a family. I actually think Bonnie acts the best with her parents around her, especially her dad.

Unread post by **HelloSweetie** » Sat Apr 29, 2017 7:30 am

tratra58 wrote:
lmmomSD wrote:I think Cody felt celebrated, and since he had a present from his grandfather to open, I think he was pretty happy. She did make a point of NOT saying she w was disappointed in the water park in front of Cody, which was good. She may have some self-centered tendencies, but she definitely loves her kids and I think that out of the sisters we see regularly, her kids have the best chance of growing up well adjusted. I don't see Julie, so I don't know how she treats her kids. That IG post was absolutely worded weird. I don't know if it was really self centered or if Bonnie just can't write a simple declarative sentence and express her feelings coherently.

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I think you are right Bonnie loves her children and this is true with moms. However, over time I have question if she puts herself in front of her kids or if this is the culture of their area. But Bonnie does and has change from earlier vlogs with where she films (in bathrooms) and even discipline she backtrack with the influence of viewer comments. Lately, I just see a more in your face type comments by Bonnie on the vlogs regarding pulling them out of school for this trip, their breakfast choices and teasing the kids. Did she or Joel need to include the clip with the teacher's disapproval of their vacation, or the breakfast with pop and a kid eating sea weed. It just brings more attention to herself and questionable parental decisions where many wouldn't agree with her. I keep wondering if she is playing a game with the viewers or why does she do this? I am seeing more similarities with the Griffith sisters than differences and that is what I expect growing up with a family. I actually think Bonnie acts the best with her parents around her, especially her dad.

I disagree. I like that Bonnie isn't hiding things, because it's REALLY annoys when vloggers lie or hide things. Think about the moment people started to turn on E&J.... Playdate vs Babysitter! Or when Ellie started formula feeding but continued to carry on about breastfeeding. Hiding things just doesn't work.

Daily Bumps is the worst for this, and there comes a point where you know a vlogger so well anyway, that they can't hide things. For example, Daily Bumps hired a house cleaner about two years ago and never mentioned it. Still though, we figured it out and knew. It was really annoying, and only made people start wondering just what else they are hiding. It's at the point now, that when they talk about something, they have zero credibility. At least Bonnie owns who she is.

Unread post by **kathpt** » Sat Apr 29, 2017 7:42 am

IceCreamCone wrote:What is the big deal about the way they handled Cody's birthday? They had a day all about him, and made sure to do an activity that HE wanted to do. If they were at home, he would have had a day at school, and would probably wait to do his birthday on Saturday anyway. It's really not that big of a deal if they have a gift for him at home. I mean, it's not like they put his birthday on hold until they got back.

Plus they're in freaking Hawaii! I think the kids are all appreciative of that as well, including Cody who is 6 and I'm sure understands isn't a normal thing for everybody to do. It's pretty special to spend a birthday in Hawaii.
I don't see the big deal about this either, he has a present at home which I'm sure is ginormous. Got to play, had a cake - the cake he wanted - a gift from his grandparents. If they had given him something else 'ah that's just a card! They could have put more effort into it!' or 'that's too big to fit into the suitcase! how did they not think of this?'. They can't win.

Unread post by **AutumnLane** » Sat Apr 29, 2017 8:02 am

I don't necessarily think the gift should've been brought from home in the suitcase or even a toy at that. Memento/souvenir from a Hawaiian gift shop would've been neat. Not every year you have a birthday in Hawaii.

Obviously the kid isn't deprived I just think it would've been nice if they put a little more thought into something specifically just for Cody.

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Unread post by **tratra58** » Sat Apr 29, 2017 8:11 am

HelloSweetie wrote:
I disagree. I like that Bonnie isn't hiding things, because it's REALLY annoys when vloggers lie or hide things. Think about the moment people started to turn on E&J.... Playdate vs Babysitter! Or when Ellie started formula feeding but continued to carry on about breastfeeding. Hiding things just doesn't work.

Daily Bumps is the worst for this, and there comes a point where you know a vlogger so well anyway, that they can't hide things. For example, Daily Bumps hired a house cleaner about two years ago and never mentioned it. Still though, we figured it out and knew. It was really annoying, and only made people start wondering just what else they are hiding. It's at the point now, that when they talk about something, they have zero credibility. At least Bonnie owns who she is.

I don't see it as hiding things, it is editing. Too much information about their lives isn't necessary and discipline/controversial areas of raising children is very subjective topic. It has nothing to do with babysitters or hiring a housekeeper.

An example is Joel putting Lincoln down for a nap with a bottle. He acknowledge this was wrong, but didn't care and all parents are aware of the teeth issues with doing this. Fine if you want to do this, but this truthfulness isn't necessary so don't film it or edited it out. Also, not everyone thought the sea weed incident was in good fun and I would't temp fate either with a comment by her viewer in regards to saying you can report this to YT.

Why is it annoying if a family channel who is doing well hires a house cleaner? (Don't follow DB). I don't want to go down the Ellie road since after the past week with their vlogs (POD), there is something wrong with E+J and they really need to edit! I am kinda of mad at myself since I want to see what happens lol.

HS I really do point out their positive with their vlogs too. They have well behaved children and they have changed for the positive in many areas. So they are doing something right with parenting.

Unread post by **lmmomSD** » Sat Apr 29, 2017 8:27 am

It's not having the housekeeper that's the problem. It's hiding it by being out of the house, or making sure they film in the bedroom, and then "Oh, we're SO exhausted! We work so hard!" When every Wednesday there's beautiful vacuum lines in the rug, and we know they're slobs. I don't care if they have a housekeeper. I would have one too if I could afford it. I hate to clean. But don't hide it. Like HS said, makes me wonder what else they're hiding.

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Unread post by **HelloSweetie** » Sat Apr 29, 2017 8:31 am

lmmomSD wrote:It's not having the housekeeper that's the problem. It's hiding it by being out of the house, or making sure they film in the bedroom, and then "Oh, we're SO exhausted! We work so hard!" When every Wednesday there's beautiful vacuum lines in the rug, and we know they're slobs. I don't care if they have a housekeeper. I would have one too if I could afford it. I hate to clean. But don't hide it.

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And don't take credit for the work! The whole reason we picked up on it was because Missy showed off her bed that she "just HAD to make a different way that day." The bed was never made that way again because we knew it wasn't Missy that did it. If they had said they got a housekeeper, then it would probably have been omen if those debates where opinion is split between those that think units NBD and those that are annoyed. I think a lot of the debates here are like that, so Bonnie censoring would be a tricky thing anyway.

Watch a couple DB vlogs Tratra, you'll see what they are like.

Unread post by **thenightowl** » Sat Apr 29, 2017 4:21 pm

OH my gosh, Boston "I'm still standin" and Lincoln "yeah yeah yeah" was freaking adorable!