Bonnie and Joel: Not Your Average BonBon Part 11

[menehune]

One, we're not talking about you. We're talking about Bonnie.

Two, what you're saying is, we can say whatever we want to our kids as long as we mean it in the best way possible? Right then.

That's not what I said at all. She didn't say it TO them, she said it in their presence.

Can everyone honestly say they've never said something critical about their children in their presence to a friend or relative? I'm not saying Bonnie should be excused for it, but I do think there is a difference between saying something to a person directly, and having them overhear you. One is absolutely bullying, whereas the other is ignorant but not nearly as aggressive.

I will also note the opinion that the word bullying is overused and that this probably add to my judgement. Not all unkind or critical words amount to bullying IMO. In this case, any feedback offered here, where we know vloggers read, is also bullying.

No, that is exactly what you're saying.

In your earlier posts you said it was her way of encouraging him, her kids are anxious, she doesn't want them to miss out.

And now you're saying that she didn't say it to them, she said it in the same room as them and they could overhear it.

ETA: Whatever. Point is she shouldn't have said it. And I don't care what other reasons you can possibly pull out of your ass, it was mean. And how old is Bonnie? Late 20s early 30s? Picking on a kid? Yeah, that's bullying.

I just read the thread and HS didn't say it was Bonnie's way of encouraging them. She actually said in pretty much every post that the words were a problem, but that Bonnie's sentiment, as in her concern, is understandable.

That's how I read it anyway.

[IceCreamCone]

She also held Joel down and tickled him for the vlog around Christmas. The conversation here went back and forth over whether or not Joel was a willing participant. To me, personally, that would be bullying. But maybe to Joel, it's not.
But yeah, calling your kids sissies, especially after just uploading pictures of them dressed as Disney princesses _for views_,, is particularly harsh to me.
And she doesn't _really_ have "tough skin". Just watch when she gets negative comments. Not saying she shouldn't be defensive-- I would be too, likely. Just saying that her reactions are not the reactions of someone who has thick skin.

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You aren't serious are you? Joel clearly was into that, in a way that many people watching were uncomfortable because of the sexual energy. He wasn't being bullied.

People here are so indignant about the word sissy, yet have said some horrible crap about the kids' appearances. You do realize they could also read here one day?

We are all bullies of the worst kind in this case.

[imnottired]

One, we're not talking about you. We're talking about Bonnie.

Two, what you're saying is, we can say whatever we want to our kids as long as we mean it in the best way possible? Right then.

Did you watch the vlog? She didn't look at them and tell them not to be sissies, that would be bullying in my opinion. She talked about her surprise at how willing they were to jump in, and how she sometimes worries they will be sissies. That's an awful word, but if she had said "too fearful" or "anxious" the phrase would be just fine. It is the label that is the problem and yes it can hurt, but she wasn't saying it to them to insult them... she was actually praising them.

People need to pick a side on these boards. I know not everyone contradicts themselves, but a lot of people do. You can't complain about kids like MG or Oliver being too fearful and whiny and how annoying it is, but then pick apart a vlogger the second they try to have a child do something they might be afraid of (Boston's swimming lessons). Sometimes the most confidence comes from facing a fear and conquering it.

My god. As I stated earlier, the kids watch the vlogs. It doesn't matter if she said it right beside them, in another room, or halfway across the damn town. They will see thier mother saying that. Do you think a child will think, "oh well she really meant it as praise. Ok thanks mom."

And I don't watch MG or Ollie much and have not commented on thier whining or whatever.

[menehune]

My god. As I stated earlier, the kids watch the vlogs. It doesn't matter if she said it right beside them, in another room, or halfway across the damn town. They will see thier mother saying that. Do you think a child will think, "oh well she really meant it as praise. Ok thanks mom."

And I don't watch MG or Ollie much and have not commented on thier whining or whatever.

You have NEVER said something stupid within earshot of your children without realizing what a bad idea it is?

Must be nice to be so perfect

But even if she didn't care if they heard it, there is a big difference between saying something to a child to hurt and bully them, and saying something stupid about them. Yes it could still put pressure and expectation on them, but not in a direct and bullying way.

What Bonnie said was stupid and ignorant, but it wasn't bullying. Messing around with Joel and how she treated her siblings are completely different relationships and irrelevant to how she treats her children.

[lmmomSD]

She also held Joel down and tickled him for the vlog around Christmas. The conversation here went back and forth over whether or not Joel was a willing participant. To me, personally, that would be bullying. But maybe to Joel, it's not.
But yeah, calling your kids sissies, especially after just uploading pictures of them dressed as Disney princesses _for views_,, is particularly harsh to me.
And she doesn't _really_ have "tough skin". Just watch when she gets negative comments. Not saying she shouldn't be defensive-- I would be too, likely. Just saying that her reactions are not the reactions of someone who has thick skin.

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You aren't serious are you? Joel clearly was into that, in a way that many people watching were uncomfortable because of the sexual energy. He wasn't being bullied.

People here are so indignant about the word sissy, yet have said some horrible crap about the kids' appearances. You do realize they could also read here one day?

We are all bullies of the worst kind in this case.

We decided see things differently (about the tickling). I didn't see a whole bunch of sexual tension on Joel's side. Definitely don't want to reopen the debate. But it just shows how we see things on the vlogs through our own filters. Because to me, being held down and tickled would be complete torture.

And yeah, we are pretty much bullies here. Yapping about people who aren't here to defend themselves.

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[boredmamaneedsdrama]

My god. As I stated earlier, the kids watch the vlogs. It doesn't matter if she said it right beside them, in another room, or halfway across the damn town. They will see thier mother saying that. Do you think a child will think, "oh well she really meant it as praise. Ok thanks mom."

And I don't watch MG or Ollie much and have not commented on thier whining or whatever.

You have NEVER said something stupid within earshot of your children without realizing what a bad idea it is?

Must be nice to be so perfect

But even if she didn't care if they heard it, there is a big difference between saying something to a child to hurt and bully them, and saying something stupid about them. Yes it could still put pressure and expectation on them, but not in a direct and bullying way.

What Bonnie said was stupid and ignorant, but it wasn't bullying. Messing around with Joel and how she treated her siblings are completely different relationships and irrelevant to how she treats her children.

There's a difference in saying something within the kids earshot and having it on the Internet FOREVER. For thousands of other people to hear, not just one or two.

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[HelloSweetie]

One, we're not talking about you. We're talking about Bonnie.

Two, what you're saying is, we can say whatever we want to our kids as long as we mean it in the best way possible? Right then.

That's not what I said at all. She didn't say it TO them, she said it in their presence.

Can everyone honestly say they've never said something critical about their children in their presence to a friend or relative? I'm not saying Bonnie should be excused for it, but I do think there is a difference between saying something to a person directly, and having them overhear you. One is absolutely bullying, whereas the other is ignorant but not nearly as aggressive.

I will also note the opinion that the word bullying is overused and that this probably add to my judgement. Not all unkind or critical words amount to bullying IMO. In this case, any feedback offered here, where we know vloggers read, is also bullying.

No, that is exactly what you're saying.

In your earlier posts you said it was her way of encouraging him, her kids are anxious, she doesn't want them to miss out.

And now you're saying that she didn't say it to them, she said it in the same room as them and they could overhear it.

ETA: Whatever. Point is she shouldn't have said it. And I don't care what other reasons you can possibly pull out of your ass, it was mean. And how old is Bonnie? Late 20s early 30s? Picking on a kid? Yeah, that's bullying.

Can you not with the vitriol? We can disagree without having to add the "I know you love Bonnie" or "ass-kissing" dismissive comments. If your argument speaks for itself and is the more popular opinion then there you have it. I however just disagree based on my perception of the vlogs and personal experience.

I've definitely been stupid and have said things in front of my kids that they probably took as insults. I can't beat a mother up over one comment.

But I definitely never meant to imply that Bonnie's words were a motivator.... no way. Her words are wrong, I just understand the sentiment she expressed and don't feel that concern was completely wrong, outdated as it may seem.

[imnottired]

My god. As I stated earlier, the kids watch the vlogs. It doesn't matter if she said it right beside them, in another room, or halfway across the damn town. They will see thier mother saying that. Do you think a child will think, "oh well she really meant it as praise. Ok thanks mom."

And I don't watch MG or Ollie much and have not commented on thier whining or whatever.

You have NEVER said something stupid within earshot of your children without realizing what a bad idea it is?

Must be nice to be so perfect

But even if she didn't care if they heard it, there is a big difference between saying something to a child to hurt and bully them, and saying something stupid about them. Yes it could still put pressure and expectation on them, but not in a direct and bullying way.

What Bonnie said was stupid and ignorant, but it wasn't bullying. Messing around with Joel and how she treated her siblings are completely different relationships and irrelevant to how she treats her children.

Get real. I have never alluded to being perfect or acted as such. Just because I disagree and side eye something Bonnie did, doesn't make me a sanctimommy.

[HelloSweetie]

That's not what I said at all. She didn't say it TO them, she said it in their presence.

Can everyone honestly say they've never said something critical about their children in their presence to a friend or relative? I'm not saying Bonnie should be excused for it, but I do think there is a difference between saying something to a person directly, and having them overhear you. One is absolutely bullying, whereas the other is ignorant but not nearly as aggressive.

I will also note the opinion that the word bullying is overused and that this probably add to my judgement. Not all unkind or critical words amount to bullying IMO. In this case, any feedback offered here, where we know vloggers read, is also bullying.

No, that is exactly what you're saying.

In your earlier posts you said it was her way of encouraging him, her kids are anxious, she doesn't want them to miss out.

And now you're saying that she didn't say it to them, she said it in the same room as them and they could overhear it.

ETA: Whatever. Point is she shouldn't have said it. And I don't care what other reasons you can possibly pull out of your ass, it was mean. And how old is Bonnie? Late 20s early 30s? Picking on a kid? Yeah, that's bullying.

I just read the thread and HS didn't say it was Bonnie's way of encouraging them. She actually said in pretty much every post that the words were a problem, but that Bonnie's sentiment, as in her concern, is understandable.

That's how I read it anyway.

Yes, this is what I said... repeatedly.

Thank you.

[HelloSweetie]

My god. As I stated earlier, the kids watch the vlogs. It doesn't matter if she said it right beside them, in another room, or halfway across the damn town. They will see thier mother saying that. Do you think a child will think, "oh well she really meant it as praise. Ok thanks mom."

And I don't watch MG or Ollie much and have not commented on thier whining or whatever.

You have NEVER said something stupid within earshot of your children without realizing what a bad idea it is?

Must be nice to be so perfect

But even if she didn't care if they heard it, there is a big difference between saying something to a child to hurt and bully them, and saying something stupid about them. Yes it could still put pressure and expectation on them, but not in a direct and bullying way.

What Bonnie said was stupid and ignorant, but it wasn't bullying. Messing around with Joel and how she treated her siblings are completely different relationships and irrelevant to how she treats her children.

There's a difference in saying something within the kids earshot and having it on the Internet FOREVER. For thousands of other people to hear, not just one or two.

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Oh I agree with you on this, but this is where I think Bonnie is stupid and ignorant. I don't see it as a move done passive aggressively knowing the kids will watch one day and get the message, and therefore I think it's a separate argument from the one everyone is having about Bonnie being a bully.

[decdu]

Did anyone else get confused in the boat vlog with whos who? I kept getting confused whether ellie was olivia and vice versa! Thought it was weird ! ellie looks as big as an 8 yr old! Crazy!


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[HelloSweetie]

I'm always giving Jared crap about encouraging Ellie to act every like a child, but I just watched Ellie's IG and can't believe Bonnie went out in public with her just wearing socks. It's pretty clear Ellie was acting like a kid to steal attention from the nieces. Bonnie just seemed to laugh and that only encourages her.....she'll never grow up if everyone continues to act like her immaturity is adorable.

[Ducklings4]

Five days of swim lessons does not make a swimmer. Her kids need to swim the whole summer.


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[boredmamaneedsdrama]

Five days of swim lessons does not make a swimmer. Her kids need to swim the whole summer.


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I was really surprised when she said lessons were done. Like, why? I don't get it

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[Ducklings4]

Well she called Olivia a chicken for not jumping off the dock. I guess now when Olivia succumbs to peer pressure they can look back at this video. If your friends jump off a bridge will you. Yes, Mom, because you called me a chicken.


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[CallieT]

Wow, today's vlog really fits into our discussion of Bonnie being a bully! I'm all for pushing your kids to do things, but that doesn't need to involve name calling (I'm glad she didn't call Olivia a sissy but she did call her a chicken and a baby multiple times and I think that's worse enough).

[dw30]

My god. As I stated earlier, the kids watch the vlogs. It doesn't matter if she said it right beside them, in another room, or halfway across the damn town. They will see thier mother saying that. Do you think a child will think, "oh well she really meant it as praise. Ok thanks mom."

And I don't watch MG or Ollie much and have not commented on thier whining or whatever.

You have NEVER said something stupid within earshot of your children without realizing what a bad idea it is?

Must be nice to be so perfect

But even if she didn't care if they heard it, there is a big difference between saying something to a child to hurt and bully them, and saying something stupid about them. Yes it could still put pressure and expectation on them, but not in a direct and bullying way.

What Bonnie said was stupid and ignorant, but it wasn't bullying. Messing around with Joel and how she treated her siblings are completely different relationships and irrelevant to how she treats her children.

Get real. I have never alluded to being perfect or acted as such. Just because I disagree and side eye something Bonnie did, doesn't make me a sanctimommy.

Absolutely one of my pet hates about YouTube comments and sometimes on these gossip sites. If you have a different opinion why does it have to be justified by their own personal actions. That's irrelevant to the actual point.

Also, just because Bonnie is better than even shittier parents doesn't mean we can't side eye her bad parenting decisions.


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[imnottired]

I'm all about encouraging (not pushing) kids to conquer fears and do things that they thought they couldn't, but the name calling, especially coming from a parent, is unnessecary. I felt horrible for Olivia.

[Baconsgirl]

Before I begin let me just state I don't watch Bonnie. I was on the passengers forum and someone made a comment about Bonnie so I checked it out.


I CANNOT believe that she sent one set of clothes each for her kids. It's gross and unhygienic for many reasons. They are kids so thier clothes are just going to get dirty and they won't have a backup.


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[HelloSweetie]

I'm all about encouraging (not pushing) kids to conquer fears and do things that they thought they couldn't, but the name calling, especially coming from a parent, is unnessecary. I felt horrible for Olivia.

I agree. Name calling is always the wrong approach. This is just another reason why you shouldn't start to see yourself as best-friends with your kids. Trash talking Ellie is different than doing it to Olivia.