E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

[HelloSweetie]

Jared included he clip of Ellie coming out of anesthesia for dramatic effect. I walk through recovery everyday and most people cry or are agitated post-surgery. Yesterday a woman was upset because she thought we stole her shoes.

Ellie was crying because she couldn't have Penny. She said so much as she was crying and Jared commented on it again later. Of course she was also upset about the situation, but people aren't being hard on her for pointing out that the grief we saw wasn't necessarily shown to help others see what it's like. It feels misleading to me as someone that sees a similar response to the most minor procedures.

[HelloSweetie]

Jared included he clip of Ellie coming out of anesthesia for dramatic effect. I walk through recovery everyday and most people cry or are agitated post-surgery. Yesterday a woman was upset because she thought we stole her shoes.

Ellie was crying because she couldn't have Penny. She said so much as she was crying and Jared commented on it again later. Of course she was also upset about the situation, but people aren't being hard on her for pointing out that the grief we saw wasn't necessarily shown to help others see what it's like. It feels misleading to me as someone that sees a similar response to the most minor procedures.

[whys0seri0us]

This is insensitive. Everyone reacts differently.


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agreed

Insensitive... no.... throwing a camera and denting a wall is nonsense... But hey they seem to have money to waste since they are the ones making money off the misscarriage...

again. Some. People. React. Differently.

I've thrown my own phone that I paid my own money with before. You aren't thinking about money in the moment.


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[whys0seri0us]

I hate how insensitive this thread has gotten I understand Ellie isn’t the best person but judging her character in the recent vlogs is awful. Claiming it’s “karma” for lying about the miscarriage on Mother’s Day. Come on guys! I personally don’t think she intentionally lied. I really think she thought she was pregnant.


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I tend to agree with this. These are real people, no matter how fake it feels to us.


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[lyddiebug]

I haven't been watching Ellie+Jared for awhile, because I generally think their videos are boring and full of enthusiasm for literally the most boring things. But, I saw the title for their miscarriage video and have watched all the videos since then. I absolutely ache for Ellie and Jared and the grieving process they are going through (not to mention Jackson, who was excited about a little brother or sister, and who probably doesn't fully understand what is happening). However, it really upsets me when they talk about how "tender" Jackson and Calvin are being to Ellie. Jackson and Calvin are toddlers. Of course, I think that they should be good to Ellie and treat her well during her grieving process, but constantly talking about how sweet they are being makes it sound like it is the job of these small children to take care of their parents. Also, Jackson probably needs some support from his parents at this juncture too; of course, they won't realize this, because they continue to treat Jackson as an infant who cannot do or understand anything.

Where have you seen them treat Jackson like an infant. She made him grow up when she was pregnant with Calvin. She treats him like her best friend and takes him to the dr with her(last time she was pregnant too). They certainly dont treat him like an infant but share too much with him.

I gave a really long explanation as to why I said that they treated Jackson as an infant, so I'm just going to quote it here. (TL;DR: I misspoke by saying that they treated him like an infant. I felt that they treated him as if he would not be able to figure out that Ellie was pregnant when they talked about the pregnancy in front of him constantly.)

I agree that they expect him to take on very adult roles; what I meant to convey is that they expect him to comfort Ellie, etc. while also acting as if he wouldn't figure out that she was pregnant when they constantly talked about the baby and her stomach in front of him. I understand how they would've gotten excited and told him so early, but it's just ridiculous to expect that you can constantly allude to being pregnant in front of your very perceptive toddler and expect him not to figure it out. My mom got pregnant with my little sister when I was four, and I was probably more involved in the pregnancy than most young kids are; my mom explained the basic concept of reproduction to me, took me to ultrasounds and doctors appointments, and had me present for the birth. So, I totally understand wanting your kid to be involved in every step of the process, but I feel like you have to be really conscious about waiting until the appropriate time and explaining the pregnancy to your children directly. It feels weird to me that they would expect to be able to talk about the pregnancy in front of Jackson, who has a younger brother and has seen the pregnancy process before, and not anticipate him guessing what was happening.

[gopedjane]

Can someone explain why they went to meds then D&C right away? I don't know much about it. My friend had a similar thing where at 12 weeks they found out just the placenta was growing and she miscarried a week later. How did they find out so fast that she wasn't going to miscarry on her own?

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[onbreak]

I can't watch.. Like when the bens folds five song comes on the radio i have to turn it.. Brings up too many sad memories.
They money is a driving force of their life now.
A few months back we were lectured that they chose what 10 minutes we get to see.

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[Kay91_]

Crazy how people have said some pretty "bad" things about an innocent child (Calvin... myself included) but no one really said much but now everyone is calling this board insensitive. Yes I feel terrible that anyone has to go through something like this & you can call me insensitive but I personally believe Ellie lives for this kind of attention & Jared loves it because $$$$. All the theatrics & production going into these vlogs this week is worse than anything that has been said on this board because it's all true.


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[onbreak]

Ive never been on a kind and sensitive gossip board or met a sweet & innocent gossip loving person.


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[Bethypooh51]

So sad that all I see when I watch this video is $$$.


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[HelloSweetie]

Honest question for those that didn't think this was too far...As far as vlogging goes, how far is too far? Is it ok to film after a child dies? That would be a true depiction as well. As long as is an experience that's happening directly to the vlogger, is there anything that wouldn't just be a true experience and that you would consider too far?

[whys0seri0us]

Honest question for those that didn't think this was too far...As far as vlogging goes, how far is too far? Is it ok to film after a child dies? That would be a true depiction as well. As long as is an experience that's happening directly to the vlogger, is there anything that wouldn't just be a true experience and that you would consider too far?

I think whatever they are comfortable with. They could have filmed this whole thing without all the dramatic camera set ups and crap. It was filmed to feel like a movie, when it's not! It's real life. Leave out the fancy music and dumb camera set ups.




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[lmmomSD]

I know I sounded really, really insensitive. I personally just want to clarify-- I am not happy this happened to them. I don't think it's because they're bad people (although I do think they're greedy and self centered). I don't necessarily think that filming in the hospital is bad or wrong, and neither is talking about the miscarriage and how they feel.
Setting up shots of Jared dramatically waiting and making it seem like a long time when it was probably closer to a half hour max, is too much. Filming Ellie crying as she was coming out of anesthesia (which a lot of people, her own sister included do) was OTT. FFS, Bonnie cried after her tonsillectomy! I'm sure she's sad, but a lot of that crying at the time and asking for Penny (???) was anesthesia, not real feeling. They crossed the line between sharing and milking it a few days ago. Maybe someone should have told Ellie she would have to be alone in the OR-- alone meaning without family members. I guarantee that they didn't leave her completely alone. And OR nurses and anesthesiologists are generally pretty nice.
I agree with HS-- the people who think we're terrible-- where's your line? Was the Bratayley family live streaming Caleb's funeral "transparent" or over sharing? I respect their sorrow and their right to grieve. But these thumbnails and vlog titles and staged scenes have an almost giddy aura. Like Nia saying that their miscarriage was almost a blessing because it "brought so many people" to them. It's also weird because they have been courting the kid audience, and this is way over the heads of so many of their regular viewers. I am afraid to read the comments. I am sure there are lots of questions from kids about things they shouldn't be learning from YouTube. Like when Missy was pregnant and there were people asking what contractions are.
Has anyone checked the tags on this week's vlogs? Very interested.


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[chatty]

I just love Bonnie and Joel. It kind of made me laugh how Bonnie got all embarrassed about asking if Ellie needed her. Jared laughed it off but he seemed a bit put out, like ha ha ha back off I'm her husband ha ha ha. I personally see nothing wrong with Bonnie's concern, I am extremely close with my sisters and find it comforting when they are around, Bonnie just wanted to be there for Ellie. P.s. Joel is a sweetie!


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[canmom2]

I hate how insensitive this thread has gotten I understand Ellie isn’t the best person but judging her character in the recent vlogs is awful. Claiming it’s “karma” for lying about the miscarriage on Mother’s Day. Come on guys! I personally don’t think she intentionally lied. I really think she thought she was pregnant.


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I dont know why people say she wasnt pregnant the dr office said she was but the numbers were low and then within a day or 2 she started her miscarriage.

[canmom2]

Jared waited so long he had time to drink a Coke? I schedule surgeries and the procedure from the time they go into the OR to the time they are out is 15-30 minutes.

HelloSweetie, can you explain ur post in special snowflake language so I can understand? Ur posts always hit a home run to a thought I have after watching a vlog, so I'd like to know what u mean.....do u schedule d&c's or other fields of medicine procedures?thank u!
Things must be done different here. My son had a small surgery.. dr was out in 15 mins but my son was gone for over 2 and 1/2 hours.


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I schedule all the surgical procedures we have at our hospital and D&C's are unfortunately a very common Gyne procedure.

[rachelmomma3]

I can't even watch. Turn the camera off! It makes me sick that they set up the camera to film this stuff to make it even more dramatic. They are gross.


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[start-the-fire]

I'm surprised no one has commented on Ellie saying repeatedly how "cute" the nurse telling her that she had done this 3 times herself was. Sweet, maybe? But Ellie says cute. Someone should really get her a thesaurus for Christmas.

It was so awkward when they were all laughing about Bonnie's phone call being silly, and Ellie practically interrupted the laughing to Segway into her bloody pad story. Like, that seemed so out of place and left everyone like "uhh.. ok..." I think Ellie just wanted to get in more of that story so viewers can feel sorry for her and how dramatic it was.

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[lmmomSD]

I hate how insensitive this thread has gotten I understand Ellie isn’t the best person but judging her character in the recent vlogs is awful. Claiming it’s “karma” for lying about the miscarriage on Mother’s Day. Come on guys! I personally don’t think she intentionally lied. I really think she thought she was pregnant.


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I dont know why people say she wasnt pregnant the dr office said she was but the numbers were low and then within a day or 2 she started her miscarriage.

Doctor doesn't actually say she's pregnant. They say her numbers are low, or not where they should be, or something along those lines. Haven't watched it in a few months. And Ellie says "But it's there, right?". And the rest of the conversation isn't clear. You never actually hear the nurse say "yes you are pregnant".
Even men can have a positive HCG. It's not a good thing, but they can. Having HCG in your system doesn't mean you are pregnant. It's the levels that matter.
I think Ellie, again is clueless about that. I really, really wish that before she tries again, she would take some time to learn about her body. I don't understand her refusal.
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[ApplePie]

I don't know, not defending Ellie, but I thought the part about Bonnie calling Jared was a good change from the dramatics of the rest of the vlog. It was lighthearted and you could tell Bonnie was really embarrassed. I actually laughed out loud at that part.