E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by lmmomSD »

Lillyy8657 wrote:Also I totally feel like Jared is using this situation as an oppurtunity to catch back up to 8 passengers in view counts and its horrible.
I was looking at the tags for the current vlogs and just checked Social Blade. Their subscribers are up _186%_ over last month. And last week, most of their vlogs were getting 75K-150K views, and the one announcing the miscarriage has 500K and the rest of the ones from this past week have all had lots of views.

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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by spooky »

Y'all know how controlling Ellie is; I'm sure she discussed with Jared what he would film before they went it. Jared would have hell to pay if Ellie saw the footage in the vlog she didn't approve of. Remember the "don't call it a babysitter" blurb that was re-recorded to call it a "play-date" instead? These two are the producers of their own "reality" show, no way she didn't okay keeping in the emotional scenes.
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by eab424 »

jillvstheworld wrote:I know very little about miscarriage and D&C's, so can someone explain what Ellie was so upset about after the operation? She kept saying "I'm so mad they didn't let you come. They made me do it all by myself." Like, as far as I know, the only people who EVER are allowed in the OR are the patient, the surgeon, and the medical team. Is there something I'm missing? Would Jared normally have been allowed to go in there, or was that just the anesthesia talking?

Sorry if that's a dumb question. It just confused me haha.
I personally was dumbfounded when I saw this vlog. Seriously she was not that far along and this was plain silly how she acted at the hospital. Both my kids were stillborn and for whatever reason each time part of my placenta got stuck (sorry to gross you out) So two days after my son was born sleeping and I was still in the hospital they took me down to the operating room. I was alone, but that was the last thing on my mind. I didn't act like a 4 year old. She wasn't under anesthesia until she went into the operating room that was her nutjob personality talking.

With C sections they allow for someone to accompany you but this is if you are not under general anesthesia. Usually D & Cs are done under general. My first one I was given an epidural and something to make me sleepy. Her weird drama and theatrics are why I stopped watching them regularly. This video though I watched. I wish I hadn't wasted my time.

I don't believe it was the drugs talking. When I came out of it I didn't act that way. It's not the same as if you got your wisdom teeth removed. I think she really was upset she didn't get her way
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by Bethypooh51 »

I rewatched the portion when Ellie was in the recovery room and it was heavily edited. We don't know what Jared was saying to her to get the reaction out of her he wanted. Jared had a plan from the very start. He knew how he wanted this entire scene to come down, otherwise the camera would not have been in the position it was in during recovery. He knew he needed to look like the dotting husband and I guarantee you he was elated that she was in tears. Drama sells...even on YouTube. I honestly wonder what her siblings think of this video.


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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by Tiger27 »

eab424 wrote:
jillvstheworld wrote:I know very little about miscarriage and D&C's, so can someone explain what Ellie was so upset about after the operation? She kept saying "I'm so mad they didn't let you come. They made me do it all by myself." Like, as far as I know, the only people who EVER are allowed in the OR are the patient, the surgeon, and the medical team. Is there something I'm missing? Would Jared normally have been allowed to go in there, or was that just the anesthesia talking?

Sorry if that's a dumb question. It just confused me haha.
I personally was dumbfounded when I saw this vlog. Seriously she was not that far along and this was plain silly how she acted at the hospital. Both my kids were stillborn and for whatever reason each time part of my placenta got stuck (sorry to gross you out) So two days after my son was born sleeping and I was still in the hospital they took me down to the operating room. I was alone, but that was the last thing on my mind. I didn't act like a 4 year old. She wasn't under anesthesia until she went into the operating room that was her nutjob personality talking.

With C sections they allow for someone to accompany you but this is if you are not under general anesthesia. Usually D & Cs are done under general. My first one I was given an epidural and something to make me sleepy. Her weird drama and theatrics are why I stopped watching them regularly. This video though I watched. I wish I hadn't wasted my time.

I don't believe it was the drugs talking. When I came out of it I didn't act that way. It's not the same as if you got your wisdom teeth removed. I think she really was upset she didn't get her way
I don't think this is a fair assessment at all. Just because you had a different experience and were effected by the drugs in a different way doesn't mean Ellie couldn't have possibly had an emotional reaction after it. And how many times are we going to have to have this "not that far along" debate? Yes this is different than a still birth but that doesn't mean its not a hard and emotional time. We've seen multiple instances of her family reacting poorly to anesthesia, totally within the realm of possibilities that Ellie experienced this too. It seemed like they were trying to keep things lighthearted beforehand. She said right before she left, in a totally normal tone, "I wish they would have put me to sleep with him in the room"...it was clearly what was on her mind before so I think it's normal that it was what was on her mind when she woke up, it just came out in a drugged up way. Maybe she had heard/read someone can be with you and was expecting/ hoping for that...she didn't throw a fit when she left. The drugs plus the emotional weight of situation seemed to all be hitting her. You're right, its not the same as getting wisdom teeth out..more drugs are typically used and everyone reacts different to them. I don't think she acted like a 4 year old at all (maybe with the camera throwing, but at the hospital, no)..I actually liked seeing some appropriate human emotions from Ellie for once. I'm all for snarking and think Jared took things way over the top, but I don't think comparing your situations and saying her reaction was plain silly is fair.
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by Cgl33 »

I don't blame her for crying and being angry. What bothered me about the vlog was that Jared made it more dramatic than it needed to be. It's already emotional. There's no need to add acting to it, like setting up the camera and constantly changing positions.

By the way, are these vlogg
ers ever just in the moment? Was Jared thinking more about how the vlog was going to turn out and what he needed to film in the waiting room then what was happening with Ellie?
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by HashtagBlessed »

I think Jared in particular seems to care more about producing this TV show than living his actual life. I think he'd rather be the camera man at times rather than Ellie's fully present husband, probably because of the issues in their marriage and Ellie's abusive personality. I think Ellie liked the attention of vlogging at first, but at this point I think she hates the feedback and scrutiny (narcissists can not handle any sort of criticism) and she would gladly stop vlogging if they could, but they don't have the earning potential to do anything else and still afford the lifestyle they've become accustomed to. Her throwing a very expensive camera against the wall might be a small insight into how she actually feels about vlogging.
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by amyfalafal »

Well they certainly sold their souls to the devil...
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by lmmomSD »

Cgl33 wrote:I don't blame her for crying and being angry. What bothered me about the vlog was that Jared made it more dramatic than it needed to be. It's already emotional. There's no need to add acting to it, like setting up the camera and constantly changing positions.

By the way, are these vlogg
ers ever just in the moment? Was Jared thinking more about how the vlog was going to turn out and what he needed to film in the waiting room then what was happening with Ellie?
You just crystallized what a few of us have been trying to say. I know I came off insensitive and cynical (yeah, it's all about me) but this is exactly what I was thinking. It's sad and dramatic all by itself. We didn't need the added music, Ellie sobbing in recovery and a waiting room montage. I know we get in them for telling instead of showing, but this was one time when telling at least some of it would have been better. It just left a bad taste in my mouth, and I do really feel bad for them. Miscarriages suck, no matter how far along you are. They are sad all by themselves. Ellie and Jared didn't need to embellish it. And I agree that she's 100% on board with this. If she didn't want the "dramatic" footage, Jared wouldn't have included it.

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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by dw30 »

lmmomSD wrote:
twinnotwo71 wrote:I feel so bad for Ellie and Jared.

When she woke up from anesthesia, her reaction was a lot like Bonnie's when she had her tonsillectomy, although not as drawn out. Their brother, Beau, had a terrible reaction to anesthesia with knee surgery. I think it's a family thing. Some people can't handle the drugs as well as others.

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Exactly. I think that what a lot of people are seeing as Ellie being upset and "raw and real", is actually her reaction to the anesthesia. Bonnie was bawling after her tonsillectomy. Beau had an emotional reaction as well.
NOT saying she wasn't actually upset, or didn't have a reason to be. Just that _some_ of the crying and wanting Penny of all creatures, was anesthesia, not so much her actual emotions. Yes, she has every reason to be sad and cry. But having a camera shoved in her face the minute she got to the recovery room, was likely to have her crying no matter what.
I am sounding like a really mean bitch, so I will stop now. I made my point. No need to keep repeating it.

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What was Beau's reaction? I never could find that vid.

Also, the overtop drama was so overdone. I can appreciate that they are showing more of a glimpse into their journey. And I'm glad they're not censoring because "kids might be watching". But they could share their story without the drama - it just comes across as disingenuous. All I can see are dollar sign's in front of Jared's eye's. Also, while watching the waiting room scene all I could imagine was the behind the scenes for all those shots and how absolutely ridiculous that would look.




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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by WTFoxtrot »

Alot of you have touched upon Bonnie & Beau's reactions to/coming out of anesthesia being bad, & how it's probably "genetic" & led to Ellie's crying as she came out of it. Some of you have hit the nail on the head that the reason Jared set up all the cameras WAS in hopes that Ellie would have a similar reaction as Bonnie did after she had her tonsils out!

That video had well over a million views & helped grow Bonnie's channel exponentially. Jared was hoping for a similar reaction from Ellie, hands down! He was so upset he missed getting Ellie saying she wanted Penny, because that was probably the "funniest" thing Ellie said or did.

& those who have said there's been an almost jovial feel to the tragic end to this journey are right. They're seeing dollar signs, hoping it'll help grow their channel & increase their views.

So disgusting!!

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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by ja14 »

Can you imagine thinking, "wow, we just lost a child, this is terrible. But, at least we are making a lot of money from it."

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E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by HelloSweetie »

dw30 wrote:
lmmomSD wrote:
twinnotwo71 wrote:I feel so bad for Ellie and Jared.

When she woke up from anesthesia, her reaction was a lot like Bonnie's when she had her tonsillectomy, although not as drawn out. Their brother, Beau, had a terrible reaction to anesthesia with knee surgery. I think it's a family thing. Some people can't handle the drugs as well as others.

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Exactly. I think that what a lot of people are seeing as Ellie being upset and "raw and real", is actually her reaction to the anesthesia. Bonnie was bawling after her tonsillectomy. Beau had an emotional reaction as well.
NOT saying she wasn't actually upset, or didn't have a reason to be. Just that _some_ of the crying and wanting Penny of all creatures, was anesthesia, not so much her actual emotions. Yes, she has every reason to be sad and cry. But having a camera shoved in her face the minute she got to the recovery room, was likely to have her crying no matter what.
I am sounding like a really mean bitch, so I will stop now. I made my point. No need to keep repeating it.

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What was Beau's reaction? I never could find that vid.

Also, the overtop drama was so overdone. I can appreciate that they are showing more of a glimpse into their journey. And I'm glad they're not censoring because "kids might be watching". But they could share their story without the drama - it just comes across as disingenuous. All I can see are dollar sign's in front of Jared's eye's. Also, while watching the waiting room scene all I could imagine was the behind the scenes for all those shots and how absolutely ridiculous that would look.




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I think Beau's video is no longer up. I can't find it where it belongs. Pretty sure it was Sept 2015.

He was very agitated and manic and jumped out of the car on the way home. Not even a moment that should have been filmed, but I don't think Emily knew what was going on. He acted so out of character that he really scared Em and the kids. I'm not surprised they pulled it.

ETA; I just found the description I did of it back when it happened and I guess Beau filmed and security had to intervene.

This is the post I made at the time since we can't go back and watch:

Spoilers from Beau's video below....


He had knee surgery and was super high after the anaesthetic. He was erratic, and manic but they still discharged him.

I think they were still in the parking lot when he suddenly became agitated and got out of the car at a stop and started walking. Emily was visibly shaken and couldn't get control of him enough to get him back to the car. Security (police?) even had to intervene.

He vlogged the WHOLE TIME
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by Nini12 »

lmmomSD wrote:
Cgl33 wrote:I don't blame her for crying and being angry. What bothered me about the vlog was that Jared made it more dramatic than it needed to be. It's already emotional. There's no need to add acting to it, like setting up the camera and constantly changing positions.

By the way, are these vlogg
ers ever just in the moment? Was Jared thinking more about how the vlog was going to turn out and what he needed to film in the waiting room then what was happening with Ellie?
You just crystallized what a few of us have been trying to say. I know I came off insensitive and cynical (yeah, it's all about me) but this is exactly what I was thinking. It's sad and dramatic all by itself. We didn't need the added music, Ellie sobbing in recovery and a waiting room montage. I know we get in them for telling instead of showing, but this was one time when telling at least some of it would have been better. It just left a bad taste in my mouth, and I do really feel bad for them. Miscarriages suck, no matter how far along you are. They are sad all by themselves. Ellie and Jared didn't need to embellish it. And I agree that she's 100% on board with this. If she didn't want the "dramatic" footage, Jared wouldn't have included it.

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The thing is, when there isn't love and companionship between the couple, you NEED all that set up. I can get teary eyed watching Bonnie telling Joel about her pre-cancer or watching Cullen and Katie talking about TTC pre-Gaines, but it's not because their videos are produced like a tv show, it's because they're real people with feelings and they care about each other.
On the other hand, neither Ellie or Jared care about anyone but themselves and money.
^^^ Sorry if there are any mistakes guys, english is not my first language
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by menehune »

Ok, I just watched today's vlog and have a few thoughts.

Why can't E&J talk normal? Everything they say sounds fake because they phrase it like a sermon.

I knew Joel would have to come help hang that painting.

Ellie says she was told to hang all her pictures lower than you'd expect. I wondered why they all seemed a few inches too low!

I really dislike the new painting (and think it's an inch or two off centre).

I feel like Jackson has caught onto the fact that he's supposed to cater to his mom.

Ellie acts like she's pleased with Jared when the camera is on her, but when it's not or she walk away from him she seems annoyed.

When they tried the fire pit out Calvin came out with Jared and he had shoes on. Ellie brought Jackson out so he did not (bare feet). It would have been around 50 degrees outside and the pavement would have been cold! They made the marshmallows and Calvin was free to run around the yard and play, but Ellie had Jackson on her lap most of the time and he was squirming and looking like he wanted down to play... only he didn't have shoes and it was too cold. I could be wrong, but my gut tells me this was intentional.

Ellie is really into Penny and Jackson at the moment because the are both giving her more attention than Calvin is.
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by HelloSweetie »

menehune wrote:Ok, I just watched today's vlog and have a few thoughts.

Why can't E&J talk normal? Everything they say sounds fake because they phrase it like a sermon.

I knew Joel would have to come help hang that painting.

Ellie says she was told to hang all her pictures lower than you'd expect. I wondered why they all seemed a few inches too low!

I really dislike the new painting (and think it's an inch or two off centre).

I feel like Jackson has caught onto the fact that he's supposed to cater to his mom.

Ellie acts like she's pleased with Jared when the camera is on her, but when it's not or she walk away from him she seems annoyed.

When they tried the fire pit out Calvin came out with Jared and he had shoes on. Ellie brought Jackson out so he did not (bare feet). It would have been around 50 degrees outside and the pavement would have been cold! They made the marshmallows and Calvin was free to run around the yard and play, but Ellie had Jackson on her lap most of the time and he was squirming and looking like he wanted down to play... only he didn't have shoes and it was too cold. I could be wrong, but my gut tells me this was intentional.

Ellie is really into Penny and Jackson at the moment because the are both giving her more attention than Calvin is.
I noticed that about the shoe thing too.

Were they waiting all this time for a monumental moment to come so they could use the fire pit? It's strange they've never used it.

It wasn't at all what I expected either.
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by MommaLindsey2 »

menehune wrote:Ok, I just watched today's vlog and have a few thoughts.

Why can't E&J talk normal? Everything they say sounds fake because they phrase it like a sermon.

I knew Joel would have to come help hang that painting.

Ellie says she was told to hang all her pictures lower than you'd expect. I wondered why they all seemed a few inches too low!

I really dislike the new painting (and think it's an inch or two off centre).

I feel like Jackson has caught onto the fact that he's supposed to cater to his mom.

Ellie acts like she's pleased with Jared when the camera is on her, but when it's not or she walk away from him she seems annoyed.

When they tried the fire pit out Calvin came out with Jared and he had shoes on. Ellie brought Jackson out so he did not (bare feet). It would have been around 50 degrees outside and the pavement would have been cold! They made the marshmallows and Calvin was free to run around the yard and play, but Ellie had Jackson on her lap most of the time and he was squirming and looking like he wanted down to play... only he didn't have shoes and it was too cold. I could be wrong, but my gut tells me this was intentional.

Ellie is really into Penny and Jackson at the moment because the are both giving her more attention than Calvin is.
I just came here to say the same thing. I feel like Jackson has turned into Ellie's favorite overnight. She was really into cuddling him and even took a nap with him and let him drool on her.


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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by BadWolf »

Does Jared not realize that we've seen him nap multiple times in vlogs? Nice try.

His whole talk about how he told Ellie not to lift a finger the whole day annoyed me. Did it ever occur to him to just leave her alone? Maybe she wants to do laundry? There is absolutely no reason she can't. Some people do better to keep busy when they are grieving. Last time Ellie miscarried we saw the Mechams over hanging out at the house, and this time they are giving Ellie space. Definitely just another thing that makes me suspect the last one was a false positive.

They really should just be taking time off, but if they didn't do it now, I bet they never will.
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by BadWolf »

Jackson is the favourite right now because the is fulfilling Ellie's emotional needs. This is a classic sign of Narcissism. Narcissists will neglect their children's emotional needs, but will expect the child to fulfill their own needs to the extent that a partner would. This is not normal and healthy support, and is abusive. I know there are plenty of people here that may not agree, so I'll link one of the many articles that mentions this tendency...

http://www.okfreud.com/how-exactly-narc ... -children/

Below is the excerpt that I feel touches on this:

3. They parentify their children
In an article from www.psychcentral.com called ‘Harming your child by making him your parent’, parentification is explained as the process of turning a child into a parent.

In other words, the needs of the child are sacrificed in order for the parent to fulfill his own needs.

‘In parentification the parent gives up what they are supposed to do as a parent and transfers that responsibility to one or more of their children. Hence the child becomes parentified’. (Minuchin, Montalvo, Guerney, Rosman, & Schumer, 1967).

Examples of parentification:

-the child needs to listen to his mother’s emotional problems or struggles as a mother or wife;

-the child needs to encourage the mother when she is in a low point in her life, thinking it is his responsibility to do so;

-the child takes over the duties of the adults in the parental home and starts cleaning, cooking or taking care of his younger siblings.
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Re: E+J: The Lessons of Karma - Part # 31

Unread post by whys0seri0us »

Don't shoot me but I love that painting. I actually enjoy Ellie's simplistic style in their home, although it does feel very empty. But that painting is gorgeous.



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