Lucy Eades: Part 11

[ohaudrey]

You should be ashamed, crazycactus.

CIO is probably one of, if not the most, harmful and cruel thing you can do to an innocent baby. You may think your kids are fine but in 20 years when they present with depression, anxiety, and other issues you are the one to blame. You might want to do some research before saying you're "not ashamed."

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... ing-it-out

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... e-so-wrong

Might wanna bookmark this one for the future:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... ting-adult

That shit is so biased, it's hard to read. It's ridiculous. And that's coming from someone who refuses to allow her kid to CIO, nurses til 2+, etc.

[Knockout]

No good parent will allow their child to CIO, thinking from an evolutionary perspective, crying is bad. Crying alerts predators. Humans have not evolved allowing for excessive crying; crying is an infant's only way of expressing themselves, and it should be viewed as only happening under dire circumstances. When your baby stops crying after hours, it means they gave up. In their mind, they have been abandoned, as their caretaker has not answered them, so they shut down.

I have 0 respect for any parent who makes their baby CIO.

[crazycrazy]

Ok Lucy Eades, Crying is not bad. Babies have to cry. Have to. They have to cry to tell you there needs, wants, and after a certain age they will cry to manipulate you . As a mother, I could distinguish cries of hunger, needing a change, and the fake cries or I just want to play cries at 2 AM. Well my kids will have structure and know that it is unacceptable to get everything you want and run this household. Giving into every single wine and whimper is not a good thing. It teaches them they are in charge. Good luck with this mentality when your kids are teenagers because they will run you like crazy. Yes you should never let a newborn cry but as I said there does come an age where they will whine to their advantage. Also my baby has never cried for hours. There are effective ways to CIO that dont involve letting your child cry by their self for hours at a time.

[Justoneofthosedays]

I have 100% been against crying it out...I have three kids two boys & a girl. So anyways always hated crying it out...until I had my daughter. She went from needing to be rocked to sleep to throwing the biggest fit ever...I was getting aggravated one night so I set her in her bed to have 5 min to breathe...she cried for 5 to 10mins & she was out for the rest of the night. I do not let her cry for more than 30min but that's happened maybe twice. She's 10mons & this started at 6ish months. Some kids just like it better. My mom said I did.

[Knockout]

And these are perfect examples of how Western society has fucked up raising babies. Parents who get THIS defensive over CIO get defensive for one reason.

[crazycrazy]

Im not defensive over the CIO vs not CIO I am offended by YOU saying "shame on you" to someone who has just stated their opinion, and YOU saying you have 0 respect for moms who differ from you.You would obviously know this if you knew how to gather context clues.

[LizLee30]

I don't see an issue with people who choose CIO method or who choose not to do CIO, what I DO see an issue with is people attacking others for their parenting methods (yes, knockout, I'm talking about you) and saying that they should be ashamed of themselves. Providing biased "evidence" (not peer reviewed, not academic, just pure bias opinion really) doesn't do anything but make you look naive and foolish. If you don't agree with CIO, that's fine, but don't use half-assed, biased sources to back up your obviously limited argument.

[Knockout]

This isn't a forum for debates so if you want to continue feel free to PM me for info. I won't clutter up Eades board, as I know how quickly things get derailed.

[kiwi]

I didn't practice CIO. I co-slept for a long time. I did pick up my baby when she was fussy. However, I never would've allowed a 15 min car ride to turn into a 2 hr car ride. I think most moms don't have that luxury even if they wanted to. I had 2 other children who needed to get to school, extra curricular activities and play dates. I needed to get my grocery shopping done. I could not pull the car over, drop everything, and nurse instead of letting my baby fuss until I got to where I was going. Luckily it hardly ever came to that, she liked the car. I always held her and nursed her once I got to where I was going. Now, of course if it was going to be a longer car ride, I'd pull over. But letting a baby fuss for 5 mins so you can drop your kids off at gymnastics, or get to the grocery store, will not hurt them.

I'm a super AP parent for the most part, but I think there's a fine line between that and obsessing. Obsessing to the point where baby takes over, and the rest of the family is left to fend for themselves. I also don't like mommy wars. They aren't my style. Lucy Eades thrives on posting that shit.

[wasteoftime]

Lucy obviously took on more than she can handle with 4 kids. If she went half way, took a break to nurse and then finished the ride then that's respectful of all the kids.. but to make them wait for 3 hours is unfair whatever the kind of parent you are. She's so obsessed with proving her AP style with the baby that she forgets AP goes beyond babyhood and she has 3 other kids. Saying she nurses for 10 hours straight and then making fun of her other children for being emotional, that was smart Lucy.

[crazycactus]

You should be ashamed, crazycactus.

CIO is probably one of, if not the most, harmful and cruel thing you can do to an innocent baby. You may think your kids are fine but in 20 years when they present with depression, anxiety, and other issues you are the one to blame. You might want to do some research before saying you're "not ashamed."

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... ing-it-out

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... e-so-wrong

Might wanna bookmark this one for the future:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... ting-adult

Ok Lucy! LOL Im raising adults here not kids that will never leave the tit....I was raised in the late 80s/90s so im almost sure I cried it out and Im pretty well adjusted, hold a steady job and have a beautiful home and family. We as a nation are raising kids that are UNABLE to cope in day to day situations because we baby them too much. Everyone gets a trophy, mom and dad are always there to save them,we dont discipline and now we have a generation of spoiled children who are entitled lazy and think the whole world revolves around them. NEWSFLASH it doesnt when and if your kids ever get off the tit they will be unable to function in a society that will chew them up and spit them out. As much as we would all love for kids to stay kids forever they dont you are not raising a child you are trying to raise good upstanding citizens of the world who work hard and are able to give something back to this world not just take. By the way its not like I was letting my child scream bloody murder until they were red faced and choking....I usually laid them down while they were still awake and most nights they just went to sleep no crying involved. If they did cry I didnt freak out and run to them its ok for babies to cry usually 5-10 mins they were out and all was well with the world. I can also look up links to things that support my opinion so its really just a personal preference as to your parenting style. I cant imagine that with as many people in this world that we have people who are suffering from anxiety because they cried it out....You do realize some people dont have enough to eat so alittle bit of crying they did as children is like the least of there worries..............

http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/h ... -1.1232468

http://psycnet.apa.org/?&fa=main.doiLan ... 7/a0027680

http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/ ... ining.html

[crazycactus]

You should be ashamed, crazycactus.

CIO is probably one of, if not the most, harmful and cruel thing you can do to an innocent baby. You may think your kids are fine but in 20 years when they present with depression, anxiety, and other issues you are the one to blame. You might want to do some research before saying you're "not ashamed."

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... ing-it-out

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... e-so-wrong

Might wanna bookmark this one for the future:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... ting-adult

Ok Lucy! LOL Im raising adults here not kids that will never leave the tit....I was raised in the late 80s/90s so im almost sure I cried it out and Im pretty well adjusted, hold a steady job and have a beautiful home and family. We as a nation are raising kids that are UNABLE to cope in day to day situations because we baby them too much. Everyone gets a trophy, mom and dad are always there to save them,we dont discipline and now we have a generation of spoiled children who are entitled lazy and think the whole world revolves around them. NEWSFLASH it doesnt when and if your kids ever get off the tit they will be unable to function in a society that will chew them up and spit them out. As much as we would all love for kids to stay kids forever they dont you are not raising a child you are trying to raise good upstanding citizens of the world who work hard and are able to give something back to this world not just take. By the way its not like I was letting my child scream bloody murder until they were red faced and choking....I usually laid them down while they were still awake and most nights they just went to sleep no crying involved. If they did cry I didnt freak out and run to them its ok for babies to cry usually 5-10 mins they were out and all was well with the world. I can also look up links to things that support my opinion so its really just a personal preference as to your parenting style. I cant imagine that with as many people in this world that we have people who are suffering from anxiety because they cried it out....You do realize some people dont have enough to eat so alittle bit of crying they did as children is like the least of there worries.............. Also I want to say one last thing you chose to use 3 psychology today articles dont you know that psychology today was criticized for doing a study on attractiveness and was called out because it said black women were less attractive based on a study they did.......Suffice it to say that the study was flawed and they quickly retracted not someone I would be trusting to put on well thought out unbiased studies.

http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/h ... -1.1232468

http://psycnet.apa.org/?&fa=main.doiLan ... 7/a0027680

http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/ ... ining.html

[Knockout]

Take it to PMs.

[flippityflop]

Jeez knockout you're kind of a bitch.

[LizLee30]

You should be ashamed, crazycactus.

CIO is probably one of, if not the most, harmful and cruel thing you can do to an innocent baby. You may think your kids are fine but in 20 years when they present with depression, anxiety, and other issues you are the one to blame. You might want to do some research before saying you're "not ashamed."

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... ing-it-out

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... e-so-wrong

Might wanna bookmark this one for the future:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/mor ... ting-adult

Ok Lucy! LOL Im raising adults here not kids that will never leave the tit....I was raised in the late 80s/90s so im almost sure I cried it out and Im pretty well adjusted, hold a steady job and have a beautiful home and family. We as a nation are raising kids that are UNABLE to cope in day to day situations because we baby them too much. Everyone gets a trophy, mom and dad are always there to save them,we dont discipline and now we have a generation of spoiled children who are entitled lazy and think the whole world revolves around them. NEWSFLASH it doesnt when and if your kids ever get off the tit they will be unable to function in a society that will chew them up and spit them out. As much as we would all love for kids to stay kids forever they dont you are not raising a child you are trying to raise good upstanding citizens of the world who work hard and are able to give something back to this world not just take. By the way its not like I was letting my child scream bloody murder until they were red faced and choking....I usually laid them down while they were still awake and most nights they just went to sleep no crying involved. If they did cry I didnt freak out and run to them its ok for babies to cry usually 5-10 mins they were out and all was well with the world. I can also look up links to things that support my opinion so its really just a personal preference as to your parenting style. I cant imagine that with as many people in this world that we have people who are suffering from anxiety because they cried it out....You do realize some people dont have enough to eat so alittle bit of crying they did as children is like the least of there worries.............. Also I want to say one last thing you chose to use 3 psychology today articles dont you know that psychology today was criticized for doing a study on attractiveness and was called out because it said black women were less attractive based on a study they did.......Suffice it to say that the study was flawed and they quickly retracted not someone I would be trusting to put on well thought out unbiased studies.

http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/h ... -1.1232468

http://psycnet.apa.org/?&fa=main.doiLan ... 7/a0027680

http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/ ... ining.html

Crazycactus, I love you! That was perfect.

[ohaudrey]

Jeez knockout you're kind of a bitch.

Lol right? I'm going to insult everyone who disagrees with me, post that I have zero respect for them, and then try to shut them down when they defend themselves. "Take it to PMs" seems pretty lame.

[ihateleaf]

We did cry it out....using the book "Seven nights to a perfect nights sleep."
My kids are okay :/ Everyone will parent how they want to. Top each their own

[ihateleaf]

Correction, the book is called"five days to a perfect nights sleep for your child" three kids and all sleep perfectly....

[FLOSSY77]

I never let my kids CIO. I BF. I also enjoy sex with my husband. I don't do for them what they can do themselves. I ignore whining. They are great kids. My children are who they are, not because of how I put them to bed. It's a ton of things. My style is different with each child. I am not a commander in the ARMY. Both of you sound ignorant! Each parent needs to find a style. One day you will miss those long nights and cuddles. This is a small part of being a parent. So if you need 50 books to help you get a baby to sleep...hehe, good luck!

[whatsername_]

Jeez knockout you're kind of a bitch.

...seriously?

I don't agree with knockout on CIO, but this is completely unnecessary.
Please hear me out...
You all got angry at her for telling someone to be "ashamed" and insulting people, and you turn right around and blatantly call her a bitch.
You guys are going in circles.

If cry it out works for you, own it.
If you don't want to use that method, then DON'T.
Stop shaming each other for the parenting choices you all choose to make.
Honestly, it's no ones fucking business and it should stay that way.

This thread is so off topic, I can't.