John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

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GGF1987
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by GGF1987 »

Celia wrote: Fri Jun 14, 2019 1:34 pm
SassySassenach wrote:
FlowersTar 68 wrote:So, Saint Joan has made another small donation in Maeve's name to the charity Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep. She didn't say how much, once again.
Now, I get why, if you make a personal donation to a charity its your perogative to keep the amount silent, that's fair enough.
Being her donation is off things she sells, shouldn't she be announcing to her buyers the amount that they have helped her donate???
If I was doing a fun run, bake sale, sponsored walk etc for a charity and I got my Co workers, friends and family to sponsor me, I'd be expected to announce how much I'd raised, right?
So, why does she feel the need not to reveal?
I would guess because it’s a terribly small percentage of sales off those over priced items and if she posts people will start saying “really? But I bought $$$ worth!” And it will steamroll with people chiming in and someone will be smart enough to do all the math .

Also, didn’t Joan say they were going to do IVF this summer?? It’s June, and in a comment the other day she admits she is still “gently weaning”, and has to be fully done for 3 months before the Dr will start the process. I thought she was desperate to do it again so quickly?? She is lacking in any kind of hustle (not that I think they need another baby right now)

.... sooo technically she could just keep dragging this out, never do IVF again & walk away with all that money.


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Honestly I don’t blame for her gently weaning Vera. It’s entirely possible that Vera is her one and only baby, I say she should enjoy the time and baby she has. Whether or not she IS is something entirely different, but you get my point. I’d much rather her take her time, fundraising or not, and let Vera wean when Vera is ready rather than stopping abruptly just to start having another baby like Rachelle Swannie did.


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The issue isn't gently weaning Vera. The issue is she's taken all of this money from people under the pretense of her having IVF and now she's dragging it out. I don't understand why she didn't just enjoy Vera and let her nurse until she was ready to wean and then re-visit the idea of IVF and funding it. Also as bad as their finances are I can see her using that money now and then fundraising again when she is ready to do IVF. The issue is Joan's been sketchy with money things like this before(or maybe I should say Joan is always sketchy with money things) and there is nothing to stop her from doing it again. I don't think they need another baby at all but if you take money from people under the pretense of using it for something specific, you should do that and you should do it in a timely manner. The longer she sits on that money without doing IVF the worse it makes her look. She should've waited until they were ready to do IVF before taking peoples money for it.
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by FlowersTar 68 »

She should be more transparent with her donations. I seem to recall that when she was selling the mustard seed necklace she did say that all proceeds for that sale will be going towards her IVF. That's fine, and she made enough to cover it.
When it comes to donations it's entirely a different story. Each time she has said that a portion of all sales ( last time it was between certain dates) will be donated. Does she decide herself on the percentage beforehand and not tell us or does she see how much she sells then decide? Say she only sells $200 worth then decides to donate $50. Then makes a fuss about donating.
Why doesn't she do a special again and say all proceeds will go to charity? That would be a noble thing to do.
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by 1000Words »

HelloSweetie wrote: Fri Jun 14, 2019 9:33 am [She is such a storyteller. The midwives went to Maeve’s funeral to show their support and Joan had a shit fit about it. They didn’t desert her, she pushed them away with her hostility and accusations. She needs to own her own choices. She’s the type who is always going to be a victim.

I can’t remember who the poster here is who knew her personally. Was this always the case with her? Was she always a self-centred, entitled and whiny nightmare?




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First of all you are correct!!!! She had them banished from
Funeral. She blames them when it’s clear that Maeve had something wrong with her. Even her look is off.
Joan threatened them too. No one has deserted her- SHE has
Deserted EVERYONE.

She wasn’t this bad but wow. She is mentally ill and I believe the only reason she is catered to by family is so they don’t take Vera out of their lives.
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by MommaLindsey2 »

Joan does have a right to be angry at the midwives. Her daughter had a condition that should have been discovered by them, she could have lived if she were diagnosed and then delivered early. The pain olympics that she still has are way over the top though.


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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by HelloSweetie »

MommaLindsey2 wrote:Joan does have a right to be angry at the midwives. Her daughter had a condition that should have been discovered by them, she could have lived if she were diagnosed and then delivered early. The pain olympics that she still has are way over the top though.


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She absolutely has a right to be critical. She can’t be indignant and outraged by any attempts they make to be supportive however, and then later act victimized because they weren’t there to supporting her enoigh. She needs to own some of her actions for once and stop changing her narrative to whatever suits the image she’s trying to project.


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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by SassySassenach »

So no birthday photos from the weekend. Only butterfly release & and an old photo of Vera, John & the Fox for Father’s Day.

Tomorrow is Vera’s birthday. Should we take guesses on what the party theme was? Will there be foxes everywhere?


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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by aral12 »

SassySassenach wrote:So no birthday photos from the weekend. Only butterfly release & and an old photo of Vera, John & the Fox for Father’s Day.

Tomorrow is Vera’s birthday. Should we take guesses on what the party theme was? Will there be foxes everywhere?


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My guess is rainbow


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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by FlowersTar 68 »

aral12 wrote: Mon Jun 17, 2019 4:39 am
SassySassenach wrote:So no birthday photos from the weekend. Only butterfly release & and an old photo of Vera, John & the Fox for Father’s Day.

Tomorrow is Vera’s birthday. Should we take guesses on what the party theme was? Will there be foxes everywhere?


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My guess is rainbow


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John, I think posted on Insta stories yesterday of Vera in her high chair and it sounded like they'd had a party and Vera's dress looked like a rainbow one.
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by 131618 »

Yup party of a million rainbows lol! Looked cute though and I'm impressed that thus far we haven't seen foxes in the pictures (other than the highchair of course)

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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by FlowersTar 68 »

131618 wrote: Mon Jun 17, 2019 8:29 am Yup party of a million rainbows lol! Looked cute though and I'm impressed that thus far we haven't seen foxes in the pictures (other than the highchair of course)

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Looks like she had a fox backpack as a present🎁🦊🙄🙄
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by GGF1987 »

The party was cute. But I don't love the theme to be honest. It still feels like more about them losing Maeve, than about celebrating Vera. I just feel like at least that one day should've been just about Vera. Not about losing Maeve and their grief over that and their journey and all that crap. Just about Vera. I think she's in for a lifetime of birthdays that aren't about her. It's bad enough to be the replacement child but to also have a birthday so close to Maeve is just going to make things that much worse unless Joan gets some real help. She couldn't even write a post today about weaning Vera without talking about what she missed out on with Maeve. She just can't see the baby in front of her and only see her. And they want to put another child through this....just sad.
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by lmmomSD »

The one good thing about having another baby is that maybe it will take some of the pressure off Vera. Right now she's the "rainbow baby". And Maeve is the perfect child who didn't get to live. And having a sibling might give her someone to bond with and when Joan does stuff like this, someone to look at and go "Mom is being weird about Maeve again"
Because right now, it's all on Vera to live up to Maeve.

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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by FlowersTar 68 »

lmmomSD wrote: Sat Jun 22, 2019 4:47 am The one good thing about having another baby is that maybe it will take some of the pressure off Vera. Right now she's the "rainbow baby". And Maeve is the perfect child who didn't get to live. And having a sibling might give her someone to bond with and when Joan does stuff like this, someone to look at and go "Mom is being weird about Maeve again"
Because right now, it's all on Vera to live up to Maeve.

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Exactly this. I feel so sorry for Vera. Poor little girl deserves to be herself and not be tagged a rainbow baby.
But, thinking about it, if they do have another baby, will Vera be made out to be more special than the new one because she Is the rainbow baby, if that makes sense. Will it be "oh, this is Vera, my rainbow baby and this is (insert name)"
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by fossilfinger »

I really hope if they have another baby it's a boy. I think that might help them shift their focus away from how Maeve-like the new baby is. But I could be wrong.
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by actuallydear »

When parents exhibit any sort of harmful behaviour towards a child, it’s not very healthy for people to think adding another child (and another opportunity for more abuse) is a good idea. It’s the opposite, really.

Emotional abuse of this kind can be just as (if not, more) harmful than physical abuse.

If this behaviour towards Vera continues through out her life, the chances of her becoming a well-adjusted person are pretty slim. She’ll likely encounter a lot of people that will defend the way her parents have acted/treated her, and she will grow to think her feelings don’t matter.

This is extremely damaging, especially as she grows and allows all sorts of behaviour from anyone because “it doesn’t matter” when no one cares enough to believe you anyway.
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by lmmomSD »

actuallydear wrote:When parents exhibit any sort of harmful behaviour towards a child, it’s not very healthy for people to think adding another child (and another opportunity for more abuse) is a good idea. It’s the opposite, really.

Emotional abuse of this kind can be just as (if not, more) harmful than physical abuse.

If this behaviour towards Vera continues through out her life, the chances of her becoming a well-adjusted person are pretty slim. She’ll likely encounter a lot of people that will defend the way her parents have acted/treated her, and she will grow to think her feelings don’t matter.

This is extremely damaging, especially as she grows and allows all sorts of behaviour from anyone because “it doesn’t matter” when no one cares enough to believe you anyway.
I absolutely get your point. I don't think Joan having another baby is a good idea. I just have this Pollyanna fantasy that if she does have another child, rather than a rival for attention, he or she will turn out to be an ally.

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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by GGF1987 »

actuallydear wrote: Sat Jun 22, 2019 1:37 pm When parents exhibit any sort of harmful behaviour towards a child, it’s not very healthy for people to think adding another child (and another opportunity for more abuse) is a good idea. It’s the opposite, really.

Emotional abuse of this kind can be just as (if not, more) harmful than physical abuse.

If this behaviour towards Vera continues through out her life, the chances of her becoming a well-adjusted person are pretty slim. She’ll likely encounter a lot of people that will defend the way her parents have acted/treated her, and she will grow to think her feelings don’t matter.

This is extremely damaging, especially as she grows and allows all sorts of behaviour from anyone because “it doesn’t matter” when no one cares enough to believe you anyway.


Exactly! Babies don't fix problems and it's unfair to expect them to. Vera doesn't need an ally in dealing with her mother's issues, she needs her mother to get the help she needs to get mentally healthy.
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by SassySassenach »

Did anyone watch the Vera is 1 video?? I started to, but fast forwarded because it was just Joan pushing a stroller and talking. I don’t even remember what she was talking about. There were some snippets from the party, but I found the whole thing weird.

The clip of Vera squealing on the bike ride was cute though :)


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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by FlowersTar 68 »

The only bit we saw of the party was everyone singing happy birthday to her!
Have you seen what she's selling now on Etsy? Moon pictures, and look at the price! No thanks Joan, I'll pass.
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Re: John and Joan: 11 Hours of Pushing Lies | Part 3

Unread post by minmouse »

How she can charge that much for her "paintings" is beyond me. If you recall, when she made them she said she got the canvases cheap on line and used finger paints. Finger paints!!! I didn't look at the listing info, does she have it listed that it's finger paint on canvas?
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