HelloSweetie wrote:Not saying the midwife wasn't crappy at all, just that Missy knew the Castor oil was a sketchy idea and was all for it. She even went for that walk around Disneyland hoping dehydration and heat would cause cramps and kick her into labour. She gets little sympathy fdom me for what happened with Finn at 30+ hrs because she agreed to all the poor choices and was clearly driving the bus before that. I don't believe for a second that Bryan pushed her to go that far and just failed to step in for her. Missy had to ask Mimi to help her figure out how she felt about things, and I completely think Mimi failed to step in for Missy because she was following her plan.
I work in surgical bookings and a doctor isn't going to perform a csection without a surgical consent from the mother. 30+ hrs is irrelevant. Bryan, Mimi, Papa, couldn't have made that call for Missy, and maybe they tried to tell her and she wouldn't hear it? We just don't know. I just don't think someone can knowingly be all for doing something the wrong way, but then cry foul when it bites them in the ass. Don't hire someone sketchy because you like their "off the cuff" ideas, but then act surprised when they give substandard care.
Just my opinion.
Wow, if this is all true that is real shit. I'm a midwife in Australia. We have to go to university and get our Bachelor of Midwifery which is taught parallel to the Nursing degree. The clinicals are just different towards the end of the degree, and some requirements like following pregnancies, etc. Midwives here work with the woman, take responsibility for the birth WITH the woman. They make decisions together not for each other. Midwives deliver babies in public hospitals here, and OBs are around but not necessary unless the mother or bub is considered high risk. This wouldn't have happened in Australia. Im from California originally, and moved to Australia and I associated midwives to hippies and uneducated witches lol. Then with my first pregnancy I saw a midwife as per public medicare system. That pregnancy ended in our first son who was stillborn at 40w9d. It was for "medically unknown" reasons as we didn't want an autopsy, though blood tests were done and clear of genetic issues. I know that in the US, t be a certified midwife, you dont need a degree, but you need to pass a few tests. Which it's completely amature in my opinion. Tests are hard, but nothing like a 3-4 year university education. My friends and family in the US see me as that kind of midwife unfortunately, they dont understand that Canadian, GB and AU midwives are far more professional and educated than in the US.
Anyway, caster oil would NEVER be advised professionally. I had one mother ask about it, and I advised nipple stimulation and walking. Missy sounded desperate to have a VBAC and that's such a huge decision, and at the hospital I work at, women are supported with that decision, but are advised every-single-appointment- that a VBAC may not happen, and that they should be aware that if the bubba is in distress or in labour for an unsafe period of time (like Finn!) an OB would do an emergency c-section. Hospital policy is to prepare women with the idea that VBAC may not work. We support them through the decision, do what we can, if it works out thats great if it doesn't they are at least prepared. Missy was in complete denial and I have never said it about anyone but she was completely selfish in the last moments of labor with Finn. She would have definitely had PPD afterwards, maybe still, as she was devastated with the outcome of her desired labour. I get it, I see it all the time. It's a natural feeling that is separate from the love you have for the child you birthed. (thats a separate topic which we know through how she treats Finn).
