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E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby lovingthisforum » Sun Dec 17, 2017 3:51 pm

lmmomSD wrote:Ugh. Katie just posted an instastory telling Ellie to make sure she takes time for herself.
At least, that seemed to be the gist of it before I couldn't cope anymore and turned it off.
"As moms, sometimes it's hard to take time for ourselves". Not for Ellie, it isn't.

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And not for Katie it is either!

Also I just watched the Birthday vlog from Bennett on the JK channel, and _Gaines_ was the trouble maker. Not Brooks! Aww sweetie, walking after the two. Did you watch? Gaines was angrily crying and screaming, because she wasn't allowed something. I was glad to get a real glimpse. Anyway, I was telling you in my mind just 10 minutes ago lol!
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby Nothankyou » Sun Dec 17, 2017 4:34 pm

3BoysandaLilMiss wrote:Unless you have experienced gender disappointment it does seem like its silly
but its real and you can experience even if you have both genders
it has nothing to do with not wanting another boy/girl and everything to do with mourning the daughter/son we don't have


This topic always gets me raged, so I’ll start by saying that . But I lost a baby at 23 weeks, she had a fatal heart defect. That is actually mourning a baby. Not the idea of a son/daughter. People really need to have perspective when it comes to gender disappointment. I went one to have a rainbow daughter and people have the nerve to ask me if I wished we had a boy, o, I’m just grateful she’s healthy. I didn’t have the luxury of only being concerned with what genitals my child had. I was too concerned that she’d have a viable heart.


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby jillvstheworld » Sun Dec 17, 2017 4:42 pm

Alright y'all, any name predictions?
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby FakingIt_MakingIt » Sun Dec 17, 2017 4:59 pm

Nothankyou wrote:
3BoysandaLilMiss wrote:Unless you have experienced gender disappointment it does seem like its silly
but its real and you can experience even if you have both genders
it has nothing to do with not wanting another boy/girl and everything to do with mourning the daughter/son we don't have


This topic always gets me raged, so I’ll start by saying that . But I lost a baby at 23 weeks, she had a fatal heart defect. That is actually mourning a baby. Not the idea of a son/daughter. People really need to have perspective when it comes to gender disappointment. I went one to have a rainbow daughter and people have the nerve to ask me if I wished we had a boy, o, I’m just grateful she’s healthy. I didn’t have the luxury of only being concerned with what genitals my child had. I was too concerned that she’d have a viable heart.


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That's crap. You don't get to play pain Olympics.
My husband I can't have children and you can bet your ass I mourned the children I miscarried and the children I won't ever have!
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby priestess » Sun Dec 17, 2017 5:00 pm

jillvstheworld wrote:Alright y'all, any name predictions?

it'll be a top 100 baby name. so really white and basic for utah.
i think it'll end in "n", like Calvin and Jackson.
it won't run in the family and it won't be the same as any of the other kids the know through youtube (i.e. Oliver is #1 in utah, though he's DB)

I think it will be Benjamin, Grayson, Hudson, Logan, or Mason. i personally love Grayson/Greyson so it will probably be that.
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby GymChick » Sun Dec 17, 2017 5:07 pm

Probably an unpopular opinion but I actually love the name Calvin, love how old fashion it is. I’m not a fan of Jackson, but I like jack. I wish they would pick something like George, Henry, Charlie, Thomas. Obviously this is all so subjective lol I can’t actually judge their name choices because I’m sure there are people who hate old fashion names and judge mine lol but it’s fun!


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby GymChick » Sun Dec 17, 2017 5:08 pm

gymchick43 wrote:Probably an unpopular opinion but I actually love the name Calvin, love how old fashion it is. I’m not a fan of Jackson, but I like jack. I wish they would pick something like George, Henry, Charlie, Thomas. Obviously this is all so subjective lol I can’t actually judge their name choices because I’m sure there are people who hate old fashion names and judge mine lol but it’s fun!

If my little girl due in April was a boy she would have been 100% a Henry. (I know it’s getting popular but I love it)


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby GymChick » Sun Dec 17, 2017 5:09 pm

Ok not sure what happened there when I edited it, I didn’t think I pressed quote but won’t let me delete sorry! ^


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby lmmomSD » Sun Dec 17, 2017 5:31 pm

Maybe I shouldn't say anything because I have a boy and a girl. But serious gender disappointment baffles me. I am close to my sister, and I wish my daughter had a sister. But I also know sisters who don't get along, so I know there's no guarantee. I can understand a fleeting "I was hoping for a boy/girl". But really getting bummed about it implies to me that there's some fantasy child that the person has in mind, and that isn't fair to the child even if you get the gender you want. I just don't understand putting a greater value on one gender or another to the point that it affects how a person bonds with the child they have, or lets it affect them a lot.
Like I said, not judging fleeting disappointment like, say Bonnie's. She was disappointed that Lincoln was a boy. At first. But she obviously adores him. And I am not really judging people who feel it worse. I know I sound like I am, but I'm not-- except for people like Missy and Carlie Butler, who treat their boys like they blew it and committed a personal affront by not being girls. I just don't understand it.

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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby formerctfxcer » Sun Dec 17, 2017 5:37 pm

Agreed. I had gender disappointment for one split second just because I “felt” like it was a girl and it was actually a boy. I got over it. I would love to have at least one of each gender but ultimately I don’t give two sh*ts. I just want healthy and happy babies. That’s it.


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby HelloSweetie » Sun Dec 17, 2017 5:55 pm

Having a miscarriage isn't the same thing as gender disappointment. Not for a second. It's the genuine loss of a child, not the figurative loss of dream or expectation.
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby staceybrax » Sun Dec 17, 2017 6:07 pm

lmmomSD wrote:Maybe I shouldn't say anything because I have a boy and a girl. But serious gender disappointment baffles me. I am close to my sister, and I wish my daughter had a sister. But I also know sisters who don't get along, so I know there's no guarantee. I can understand a fleeting "I was hoping for a boy/girl". But really getting bummed about it implies to me that there's some fantasy child that the person has in mind, and that isn't fair to the child even if you get the gender you want. I just don't understand putting a greater value on one gender or another to the point that it affects how a person bonds with the child they have, or lets it affect them a lot.
Like I said, not judging fleeting disappointment like, say Bonnie's. She was disappointed that Lincoln was a boy. At first. But she obviously adores him. And I am not really judging people who feel it worse. I know I sound like I am, but I'm not-- except for people like Missy and Carlie Butler, who treat their boys like they blew it and committed a personal affront by not being girls. I just don't understand it.

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I think it’s different with Bonnie because she wasn’t really disappointed she was having a boy, she was sad FOR olivia because she will never have a sister. Olivia desperately wanted a sister and Bonnie’s disappointment was for olivia not for herself. And I think the difference with Bonnie and Ellie is that Bonnie wouldn’t change Lincoln for anything in the world but Ellie will forever be disappointed his baby isn’t a girl.


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby HashtagBlessed » Sun Dec 17, 2017 6:41 pm

firefox wrote:Did anyone notice the pink confetti on Bonnie after Julie’s reveal? She’s having a girl. How did Jared not see that in editing?!? Kind of rude to spoil it for them.


I saw the pink confetti in Bonnie's hair too. Looks like Julie is having a girl.
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby Kaylor1 » Sun Dec 17, 2017 6:43 pm

Especially if their daughter took after the Mecham's or Bonnie. I in no way think those women are over weight or ugly but we all know Ellie doesn't see their body types as ideal. No girl deserves to feel less than by their own mother!!!

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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby 3BoysandaLilMiss » Sun Dec 17, 2017 6:53 pm

I know with my 3rd boy I was disappointed I think because I was so sure he was a girl
and the fact I ad got it wrong?
the 1st 2 I had guessed they where boys and we never even had girl names as an opinion
then I started wondering if my miscarriage before him and his twin I lost where girls

I think the expectation others but on you for the boy /girl combination does'nt help
"do you hope its a girl, when are you going to have a girl" (like we have a choice?) while pregnant

funny enough my 4th I didn't really care (after having 3 in under 4yrs then a 6 1/2yr gap) their baby stage was a blur
I was happy enough to enjoy those baby snuggles again and just to be able to sit and take it all in (while the others where at school)
we also didn't tell people until after 20wks so we already knew the gender so that saved the 50 million questions about the gender
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby littlebaby » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:00 pm

I don’t think they’ll name him Mason because it would make for an anticlimactic name reveal later on since they already mentioned the name in the gender reveal. That’s not the youtube way! I love the name Mason though and have considered it for future kids of mine, but I know it’s very popular right now and that’s throwing me off. I would name a girl Mason too though probably.


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby gopedjane » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:19 pm

This is seriously why I think gender should be a surprise at birth. I thought I was having a girl then had a boy. I was sooooo surprised but it was a great surprise. Now I would prefer to have a another boy because I feel single gender would be easier but who really cares these days; you get what you get if you are lucky to have a child. I so wanted her to have a boy because I can’t stand her smug entitled attitude she gets. I am happy Julie is having a girl.

I just thought that the coats could be real because Jared would think it would look better than spending a fortune on the real thing not knowing the reality of the situation. They are definitely not as worldly as they think. I could see them seeing the knock offs then buying the real ones. However that could just be far fetched and they are just knock offs like he said.


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby ewokfan11 » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:31 pm

The thing about "bullet journaling"...isn't that just called being organized to most people??? Is it a Mormon thing?? I guess I've been bullet journaling my ENTIRE LIFE and never knew. LOL! These people are inane with their bogus terms for NORMAL things. :-o :-o
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby onbreak » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:35 pm

Bullet journaling was encouraged when l was in high school for note taking, in the 90s

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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby lmmomSD » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:35 pm

3BoysandaLilMiss wrote:I know with my 3rd boy I was disappointed I think because I was so sure he was a girl
and the fact I ad got it wrong?
the 1st 2 I had guessed they where boys and we never even had girl names as an opinion
then I started wondering if my miscarriage before him and his twin I lost where girls

I think the expectation others but on you for the boy /girl combination does'nt help
"do you hope its a girl, when are you going to have a girl" (like we have a choice?) while pregnant

funny enough my 4th I didn't really care (after having 3 in under 4yrs then a 6 1/2yr gap) their baby stage was a blur
I was happy enough to enjoy those baby snuggles again and just to be able to sit and take it all in (while the others where at school)
we also didn't tell people until after 20wks so we already knew the gender so that saved the 50 million questions about the gender
We actually didn't find out with my daughter. They asked, and we didn't want to know. We did with my son because we wanted to know "do we donate the obviously girly stuff or keep it?"

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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby ewokfan11 » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:37 pm

onbreak wrote:Bullet journaling was encouraged when l was in high school for note taking, in the 90s


That's odd! Maybe it's a regional thing?? Never heard of it. Bullet points, yes. Bullet journaling, no.
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby Mk1 » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:45 pm

3BoysandaLilMiss wrote:and Ruby was like OMG no way... a few times

unless it s a super light blue it looks pink?


I think it’s gonna be a girl. Looking forward to seeing!
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby Mk1 » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:50 pm

gymchick43 wrote:Probably an unpopular opinion but I actually love the name Calvin, love how old fashion it is. I’m not a fan of Jackson, but I like jack. I wish they would pick something like George, Henry, Charlie, Thomas. Obviously this is all so subjective lol I can’t actually judge their name choices because I’m sure there are people who hate old fashion names and judge mine lol but it’s fun!


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I hope they don’t choose Charlie because I love that name and I think that would for sure ruin it for me! Haha
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby booboo2017 » Sun Dec 17, 2017 8:06 pm

I vote it’s going to be mason or something short with a 3-4 letters


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Postby soul_in_a_earthsuit » Sun Dec 17, 2017 8:26 pm

lmmomSD wrote:Maybe I shouldn't say anything because I have a boy and a girl. But serious gender disappointment baffles me. I am close to my sister, and I wish my daughter had a sister. But I also know sisters who don't get along, so I know there's no guarantee. I can understand a fleeting "I was hoping for a boy/girl". But really getting bummed about it implies to me that there's some fantasy child that the person has in mind, and that isn't fair to the child even if you get the gender you want. I just don't understand putting a greater value on one gender or another to the point that it affects how a person bonds with the child they have, or lets it affect them a lot.
Like I said, not judging fleeting disappointment like, say Bonnie's. She was disappointed that Lincoln was a boy. At first. But she obviously adores him. And I am not really judging people who feel it worse. I know I sound like I am, but I'm not-- except for people like Missy and Carlie Butler, who treat their boys like they blew it and committed a personal affront by not being girls. I just don't understand it.

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I knew a woman who would tell her daughter she so wished she was a boy and called her “my little disappointment”. Like wtffffff


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