E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by HelloSweetie »

Having a miscarriage isn't the same thing as gender disappointment. Not for a second. It's the genuine loss of a child, not the figurative loss of dream or expectation.
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by staceymj »

lmmomSD wrote:Maybe I shouldn't say anything because I have a boy and a girl. But serious gender disappointment baffles me. I am close to my sister, and I wish my daughter had a sister. But I also know sisters who don't get along, so I know there's no guarantee. I can understand a fleeting "I was hoping for a boy/girl". But really getting bummed about it implies to me that there's some fantasy child that the person has in mind, and that isn't fair to the child even if you get the gender you want. I just don't understand putting a greater value on one gender or another to the point that it affects how a person bonds with the child they have, or lets it affect them a lot.
Like I said, not judging fleeting disappointment like, say Bonnie's. She was disappointed that Lincoln was a boy. At first. But she obviously adores him. And I am not really judging people who feel it worse. I know I sound like I am, but I'm not-- except for people like Missy and Carlie Butler, who treat their boys like they blew it and committed a personal affront by not being girls. I just don't understand it.

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I think it’s different with Bonnie because she wasn’t really disappointed she was having a boy, she was sad FOR olivia because she will never have a sister. Olivia desperately wanted a sister and Bonnie’s disappointment was for olivia not for herself. And I think the difference with Bonnie and Ellie is that Bonnie wouldn’t change Lincoln for anything in the world but Ellie will forever be disappointed his baby isn’t a girl.


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by HashtagBlessed »

firefox wrote:Did anyone notice the pink confetti on Bonnie after Julie’s reveal? She’s having a girl. How did Jared not see that in editing?!? Kind of rude to spoil it for them.
I saw the pink confetti in Bonnie's hair too. Looks like Julie is having a girl.
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by Kaylor1 »

Especially if their daughter took after the Mecham's or Bonnie. I in no way think those women are over weight or ugly but we all know Ellie doesn't see their body types as ideal. No girl deserves to feel less than by their own mother!!!

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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by 3BoysandaLilMiss »

I know with my 3rd boy I was disappointed I think because I was so sure he was a girl
and the fact I ad got it wrong?
the 1st 2 I had guessed they where boys and we never even had girl names as an opinion
then I started wondering if my miscarriage before him and his twin I lost where girls

I think the expectation others but on you for the boy /girl combination does'nt help
"do you hope its a girl, when are you going to have a girl" (like we have a choice?) while pregnant

funny enough my 4th I didn't really care (after having 3 in under 4yrs then a 6 1/2yr gap) their baby stage was a blur
I was happy enough to enjoy those baby snuggles again and just to be able to sit and take it all in (while the others where at school)
we also didn't tell people until after 20wks so we already knew the gender so that saved the 50 million questions about the gender
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by littlebaby »

I don’t think they’ll name him Mason because it would make for an anticlimactic name reveal later on since they already mentioned the name in the gender reveal. That’s not the youtube way! I love the name Mason though and have considered it for future kids of mine, but I know it’s very popular right now and that’s throwing me off. I would name a girl Mason too though probably.


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by gopedjane »

This is seriously why I think gender should be a surprise at birth. I thought I was having a girl then had a boy. I was sooooo surprised but it was a great surprise. Now I would prefer to have a another boy because I feel single gender would be easier but who really cares these days; you get what you get if you are lucky to have a child. I so wanted her to have a boy because I can’t stand her smug entitled attitude she gets. I am happy Julie is having a girl.

I just thought that the coats could be real because Jared would think it would look better than spending a fortune on the real thing not knowing the reality of the situation. They are definitely not as worldly as they think. I could see them seeing the knock offs then buying the real ones. However that could just be far fetched and they are just knock offs like he said.


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by ewokfan11 »

The thing about "bullet journaling"...isn't that just called being organized to most people??? Is it a Mormon thing?? I guess I've been bullet journaling my ENTIRE LIFE and never knew. LOL! These people are inane with their bogus terms for NORMAL things. :-o :-o
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by onbreak »

Bullet journaling was encouraged when l was in high school for note taking, in the 90s

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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by lmmomSD »

3BoysandaLilMiss wrote:I know with my 3rd boy I was disappointed I think because I was so sure he was a girl
and the fact I ad got it wrong?
the 1st 2 I had guessed they where boys and we never even had girl names as an opinion
then I started wondering if my miscarriage before him and his twin I lost where girls

I think the expectation others but on you for the boy /girl combination does'nt help
"do you hope its a girl, when are you going to have a girl" (like we have a choice?) while pregnant

funny enough my 4th I didn't really care (after having 3 in under 4yrs then a 6 1/2yr gap) their baby stage was a blur
I was happy enough to enjoy those baby snuggles again and just to be able to sit and take it all in (while the others where at school)
we also didn't tell people until after 20wks so we already knew the gender so that saved the 50 million questions about the gender
We actually didn't find out with my daughter. They asked, and we didn't want to know. We did with my son because we wanted to know "do we donate the obviously girly stuff or keep it?"

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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by ewokfan11 »

onbreak wrote:Bullet journaling was encouraged when l was in high school for note taking, in the 90s
That's odd! Maybe it's a regional thing?? Never heard of it. Bullet points, yes. Bullet journaling, no.
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by Mk1 »

3BoysandaLilMiss wrote:and Ruby was like OMG no way... a few times

unless it s a super light blue it looks pink?
I think it’s gonna be a girl. Looking forward to seeing!
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by Mk1 »

gymchick43 wrote:Probably an unpopular opinion but I actually love the name Calvin, love how old fashion it is. I’m not a fan of Jackson, but I like jack. I wish they would pick something like George, Henry, Charlie, Thomas. Obviously this is all so subjective lol I can’t actually judge their name choices because I’m sure there are people who hate old fashion names and judge mine lol but it’s fun!


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I hope they don’t choose Charlie because I love that name and I think that would for sure ruin it for me! Haha
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by booboo2017 »

I vote it’s going to be mason or something short with a 3-4 letters


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by soul_in_a_earthsuit »

lmmomSD wrote:Maybe I shouldn't say anything because I have a boy and a girl. But serious gender disappointment baffles me. I am close to my sister, and I wish my daughter had a sister. But I also know sisters who don't get along, so I know there's no guarantee. I can understand a fleeting "I was hoping for a boy/girl". But really getting bummed about it implies to me that there's some fantasy child that the person has in mind, and that isn't fair to the child even if you get the gender you want. I just don't understand putting a greater value on one gender or another to the point that it affects how a person bonds with the child they have, or lets it affect them a lot.
Like I said, not judging fleeting disappointment like, say Bonnie's. She was disappointed that Lincoln was a boy. At first. But she obviously adores him. And I am not really judging people who feel it worse. I know I sound like I am, but I'm not-- except for people like Missy and Carlie Butler, who treat their boys like they blew it and committed a personal affront by not being girls. I just don't understand it.

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I knew a woman who would tell her daughter she so wished she was a boy and called her “my little disappointment”. Like wtffffff


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by Pency »

gymchick43 wrote:
Pency wrote:Can somebody explain the exchange that happened about the coats before Jared deleted?
Few pages back I posted screen shots and what happened


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Thanks, found it. This thread is moving so fast now. It’s funny to me that he was so quick to call it a “knock off” if he had never heard of the brand. The photo in question is pretty great, and it’s funny to me that not only the logo on the sleeve is spot on AND the logo on the zipper pull is there. It just makes me wonder if they weren’t prepared with this response and they are actually real. They probably don’t want people to know they bought $900 coats from a company that uses real animal fur. OR they are just super good counterfeits, which is also disgusting.

I can’t even with these people.
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by ewokfan11 »

AHA! I called a friend of mine who is really into these daily planners and she said "bullet journaling" is basically a new term for having a day planner.

Then I Googled and this came up: https://www.tamingdata.com/2013/12/18/t ... cled-idea/

Jeez, it's AMAZING how people try to cash in on basic and old ideas. Did Ellie just never know how to make a to-do list before the term bullet journaling came along?? :(
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by amyfalafal »

amyfalafal wrote:My guesses for names..

For Boy: Brody Clark, Brody separately, Clark Separately, Beckette (And they wont care that it is their "friend" Aimee Waters' stillborn son's name because we know how "sensitive" Ellie is and wont care because she gets what she wants), Dallen, Darren, or Wyatt.

For Girl: I hope not Sonya( because Aunt Sonya deserves to be remembered by someone more loveable than Ellie), Abigail, Hannah, Ivy, or Zoe.
I still am thinking these boys for E&J's boy. Is there an "Ellie"-male equivalent name she'd use? ;)
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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by staceymj »

amyfalafal wrote:
amyfalafal wrote:My guesses for names..

For Boy: Brody Clark, Brody separately, Clark Separately, Beckette (And they wont care that it is their "friend" Aimee Waters' stillborn son's name because we know how "sensitive" Ellie is and wont care because she gets what she wants), Dallen, Darren, or Wyatt.

For Girl: I hope not Sonya( because Aunt Sonya deserves to be remembered by someone more loveable than Ellie), Abigail, Hannah, Ivy, or Zoe.
I still am thinking these boys for E&J's boy. Is there an "Ellie"-male equivalent name she'd use? ;)
Elliot? Elliot mecham. I can see them using that.


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Re: E+J: No Longer Infertile, Just Insensitive | Part 34

Unread post by ja14 »

Bullet journaling is huge right now. There's a ton on YouTube & Pinterest about it.


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