RECAP: minimalist? Nah
“What I’ve put on my registry the third time around” - why is there even a registry at all this time? Oh yeah you’re a greedy hag. Go on.
“You only have one year with your baby..” so treat yourself basically. I thought she was a MiNiMaLiSt?
The most condescending, snide, rude discussion of quality vs quantity ever. Fuck you poor people, JUST WORK HARDER! (Like Elle!)
“Invest so you aren’t buying multiple things multiple times for multiple children” - like Elle, who used the same car seat, bassinet, and rocker for her kids... oh wait, girlfriend NEVER practices what she preaches.
She blows West Coast Kids for a while, gives it to them really good. Like, nice and slow for a LONG time. She just goes on and on and on.
Elle prefers “artisan” thrift stores to “box box” thrift stores
one of my new fav dumb quotes of hers.
Before I list the items, a couple of weird things. 1) She doesn’t actually show the items. A couple she puts pic from their website, but she doesn’t actually have the items herself and show their quality. 2) Some of these items she has never even tried herself, yet she is recommending them.
My prices are lower than hers I think, I just googled the item and she links WCK. WCK website is glitchy and slow for me though.
$130 - peanut changing pad. A “good deal” because you don’t have to buy covers. Makes poop jokes and laughs maniacally at herself.
$? - “breathable” mattress that you then cover in a waterproof sheet, must be organic and free of toxins and sustainably made by faeries. She doesn’t recommend a brand.
$? - rocker, she says she linked one but doesn’t. I did notice ALL of her links are the WCK
$75 - baby ktan wrap. She admits she has many others and just wanted to try this. She also says she doesn’t like the more structured carriers for older babies (ergo) and that’s obvious since she hates older kids. I used my ergo with my toddler, she hates her toddler so why would she carry him?
There’s 26 min left I can’t do this
$250-300 Mamaroo because Elle is a snooty bitch and buying the most expensive swing makes her feel relevant and part of the YouTube elite (reality - she’s a nobody and no amount of overpriced swings will change that)
$14/2 pack Bibs soother because Elle likes the colors they match her outfits.
$18 each Ryan & Rose soother, again the aEsThEtiCs
$25/2 pack como tomo bottles
$30/3 pack nursche bottle
^^ “I like that they are silicone and have good designs”
$20 haakaa pump she’s never even tried is a “MUST HAVE”
$200 Medela pump, I guess she decided to jump on that sponsorship because she’s no longer shit talking them for being bulky and having cords.
$22 soft book
$140 macrame play gym
$70 bead frame toy
^ she recommends wooden toys for the ENVIRONMENT and thinks kids only need a couple of toys to engage in “deep play” (maybe true! But let’s be real, she chooses toys based on aesthetics now how they will be played with)
$1,600 (excuse me?! I just shit myself) bugaboo donkey stroller - she’s had the “privilege” of reviewing a lot of strollers on her channel and this “the best”. IT BETTER FUCKING BE! My first car was less than that! “When all things are considered it’s the best investment” — some of her viewers live in less than $1,600 a month. I don’t get this recommendation at all
$65 dekor diaper pail, again she likes the look better vs diaper genie. Also higher quality plastic so it’s “better for the environment”
$30 love to dream swaddle (“you need a couple”)
$55/3 pack muslin swaddle
^ “I’ll link my slew ebook below!” in case you want to waste MORE money!
$380 pink car seat “MUST HAVE” because the looks and it isn’t as heavy as the boys car seat
any excuse to spoil baby girl.
$1,500 snoo bassinets “we invested in the Cadillac or sleepers” ok Elle I don’t know why you keep repeating this line like it’s hilarious? It isn’t. You look like a snooty bitch. The creator is an actual sleep educator unlike Elle, who wrote her own eBoOk!!! “LIFESAVER” she says about the bassinet she hasn’t even tried. Several minutes of justifying this purchase
$190-250 jujube bff diaper bag, she had one for Cohen and bought another because ???
$30 little unicorn linens, this is the price for just she sheet, other linens are extra. $17 for the burp cloth, $30 for the blanket, etc. “INCREDIBLE QUALITY”
$? White noise machine to block out the sound of your child screaming in their own vomit so that you can enjoy your tea and mommy time
$60 nursing pillow “I’ve tried so many!” We get it you have disposable income congrats.
$300 nanit baby monitor when she already has one and google home and security cameras. Creeper Elle needed a NEW one because she still uses the other ones to watch her older kids? So weird.
$25 milestone blocks because if you aren’t instagramming your baby what is the point of parenthood???
$30-50 diaper caddy when you’re too lazy to walk for diapers. God forbid you use a $5 basket, NOPE but be a $50 light up diaper caddy
$20 wet/dry bag to avoid single use plastic. Except for her single use plastic pampers THOSE are worth it.
$30 travel white noise so you can block your kid out ON THE GO
$200 owlet monitor for baby girl, because as we all know her life is way more valuable than the boys
$250 rose gold baby food maker. Ok, my chef quality cuisnart food processor cost this much? Why? OH BECAUSE ROSE GOLD! And of course the $25 ice cube tray to store food in!
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST that was a long video. High five to any of us who made it through.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
you psychopath your videos don’t even get 10k views. One recent video had 4K views. So all 4 THOUSANDS of people asked you?!! Uhhhh sure 
