Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

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Lolislol26
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by Lolislol26 »

ThisIsMeCeej wrote:
sssabrina wrote: Mon Apr 20, 2020 9:42 am I don't think she censors much for Hazzel's sake. She was not answering certain Randy/Albert questions because Hazzel was in earshot but then also saying things like "I'm like cut me daddy in bed". So as far as Hazzel seeing the video, I'd venture to assume that's she already heard it all and worse.
That's just sad... and she seems to have changed so much. She may say she's always been this way, but... she certainly never acted/talked like this before. She would have never posted about such things previously. So, is Dann a bad influence or is Haylee going through something and needs to get her head on straight?
When Haylee first started talking about sex and the cutting fetish she said that Randy was never comfortable with it and they didn’t explore together. I assume their sex life was very vanilla. Haylee said she was into cutting and stuff prior to Dann and Randy leading me to believe she started as a teen considering she met Randy so young.
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by ThisIsMeCeej »

One positive thing I have to say about Haylee, she's 99% always cooked home cooked meals for Hazzel. And actual home cooked, not from boxes, or frozen pre-made, meals. Whether it was her or Randy or now Dann or her parents, she rarely got Hazzel fast food, at least that she shows. Hazzel always seems genuinely excited to ever go to a fast food place. They would go to sit down dining, but.. I would think of that as more "healthy" than say, McDonald's. She also feeds Hazzel a good amount of food, and doesn't leave her hungry. After watching some of these other family vloggers, and teen moms and ex-teen moms channels... it's something I find positive with her. And the fact she sits down with Hazzel and helps her with her home school right now, and is invested in that.
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by Lolislol26 »

I think the way Haylee parents as far as home cooked meals, homework, and hygiene goes she’s far above any other Youtubers I’ve seen.


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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by karunohana »

Whats with the TV always running? I've seen it with several vloggers. Is this an american thing or a vlogger thing? Especially while doing homeschool.
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by purplemoose »

Lolislol26 wrote: Sat May 02, 2020 11:08 am I think the way Haylee parents as far as home cooked meals, homework, and hygiene goes she’s far above any other Youtubers I’ve seen.


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Sadly I don't think any of that can make up for a highly unstable family unit and being on her third dad by the age of six/seven. Hazzel has an ACE (childhood toxic stress) score of at least 2 or more (1 for loss of a parent or two in her case, 1 for a parent diagnosed with mental illness, and there are also criteria on parental history of substance abuse and domestic violence that may apply) which puts her at increased risk for all kinds of social, emotional and health problems down the line. In the grand scheme of things I don't think she's better off than a kid who ate fast food in a dirtier home but didn't have these types of traumas.
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by NigheanDonn »

karunohana wrote: Sat May 02, 2020 11:39 am Whats with the TV always running? I've seen it with several vloggers. Is this an american thing or a vlogger thing? Especially while doing homeschool.
I think Haylee has mentioned in a past video that she can't stand complete silence in the house and has to always have some kind of background noise. I know a lot of people like that (I'm in the US) but I personally am the opposite lol I value any amount of silence I get in the house
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by Lolislol26 »

purplemoose wrote:
Lolislol26 wrote: Sat May 02, 2020 11:08 am I think the way Haylee parents as far as home cooked meals, homework, and hygiene goes she’s far above any other Youtubers I’ve seen.


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Sadly I don't think any of that can make up for a highly unstable family unit and being on her third dad by the age of six/seven. Hazzel has an ACE (childhood toxic stress) score of at least 2 or more (1 for loss of a parent or two in her case, 1 for a parent diagnosed with mental illness, and there are also criteria on parental history of substance abuse and domestic violence that may apply) which puts her at increased risk for all kinds of social, emotional and health problems down the line. In the grand scheme of things I don't think she's better off than a kid who ate fast food in a dirtier home but didn't have these types of traumas.

I’m not saying Haylee is perfect or that Hazzel has the ideal childhood. I’m just saying that Haylee does deserve credit for staying on top of Hazzel’s hygiene, school work, and being on top of meals.
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by lizpuff2006 »

Yes Haylee can provide Hazzel with food and basic necessities. A lot of really bad parents can also do that. What she has not been providing is stability. Hazzel has seen men in and out of her life, she has moved countless times, her mom has had breakdowns in front of her, and I think meals and schoolwork don't make up at all for what that poor girl has gone through

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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by fossilfinger »

lizpuff2006 wrote: Sun May 03, 2020 12:27 am Yes Haylee can provide Hazzel with food and basic necessities. A lot of really bad parents can also do that. What she has not been providing is stability. Hazzel has seen men in and out of her life, she has moved countless times, her mom has had breakdowns in front of her, and I think meals and schoolwork don't make up at all for what that poor girl has gone through

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Yeah, parents who don't give their kids nourishing food or keep up with their hygiene are not even doing the bare minimum and it sets the bar really low that parents would be recognized for doing these things. I have always thought Haylee was an engaged parent to Hazzel. She gets down on her level to play and seems to be invested in her. However, her hopping from man to man is a huge problem that can't be overlooked. Of course Haylee does many good things parenting-wise, but not every parent can be judged as "good" or "bad," there's a huge gray area. And Haylee definitely falls into the gray area with many of the life choices she's made.
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by purplemoose »

Lolislol26 wrote: Sat May 02, 2020 9:59 pm
purplemoose wrote:
Lolislol26 wrote: Sat May 02, 2020 11:08 am I think the way Haylee parents as far as home cooked meals, homework, and hygiene goes she’s far above any other Youtubers I’ve seen.
Sadly I don't think any of that can make up for a highly unstable family unit and being on her third dad by the age of six/seven. Hazzel has an ACE (childhood toxic stress) score of at least 2 or more (1 for loss of a parent or two in her case, 1 for a parent diagnosed with mental illness, and there are also criteria on parental history of substance abuse and domestic violence that may apply) which puts her at increased risk for all kinds of social, emotional and health problems down the line. In the grand scheme of things I don't think she's better off than a kid who ate fast food in a dirtier home but didn't have these types of traumas.
I’m not saying Haylee is perfect or that Hazzel has the ideal childhood. I’m just saying that Haylee does deserve credit for staying on top of Hazzel’s hygiene, school work, and being on top of meals.
Sorry, I brought it up because in one of her lives recently Haylee said "I'm not worried that I messed Hazzel up because I know I'm a good mom" who does xyz. Like girl no amount of French toast can make up for daddy issues. I know she has always done her best to meet Hazzel's needs as parents should, she's definitely not negligent with that stuff. It's a sad cycle though. Haylee's mom was messed up, Haylee is messed up, Hazzel will be messed up.
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by purplemoose »

Someone posted this on the OKbaby thread, it fits most teen moms I've seen.

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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by ThisIsMeCeej »

purplemoose wrote: Sun May 03, 2020 11:19 am Someone posted this on the OKbaby thread, it fits most teen moms I've seen.

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Honestly. it fits a lot of moms.. not just teen moms, sadly, though I would say moreso happen to be teens. :(
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by GossipPeasant »

Dann’s family are apparently rude as hell 😬
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by pianogossiper »

Yikes.

Someone actually tried to say that it's fine because Hazzel isn't technically their grandkid. While true, Dustin and Sterling are and Hazzel is just as much related to Sterling as Dustin is.

Hazzel is old enough to notice a difference and ask, if Dan's family want to treat Hazzel differently then I fully back Haylee's decision to withhold Sterling from them. I dont usually agree with kids being used as pawns in fights, but Hazel's mental health and wellbeing is valid and important and Haylee needs to take a stance to show them they need to step it up.

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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by lizpuff2006 »

Double post
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by lizpuff2006 »

She says danns ex's kid ( who is also not danns) got a lot of gifts from them. To me it's not something to expect but it's terribly sad that Hazzel is old enough to realize it and be hurt. I'd be so hurt for her. She said they changed when she stopped watching Dustin as much. I assume when sterling was born so if that's the case they are really petty. A phone call costs nothing and a card is cheap.

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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by jellybean »

Apparently she has the same issue with Dann. Yiiikes. It also sounds like it's an issue that stemmed from them feeling like she was treating Dustin differently though. [IMG]//uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/202005 ... 96bd53.jpg[/IMG]
[IMG]//uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/202005 ... ef535c.jpg[/IMG]
[IMG]//uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/202005 ... ea8c45.jpg[/IMG]


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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by nutbagmcgee »

This makes me so sad for Hazel. Where is Haley going to go if she leaves him? Does she even own a car?

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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by fossilfinger »

Why in the world is Haylee staying with Dann when he treats Hazzel and Sterling like they're less important than Dustin? These issues aren't just that he's less bonded with Hazzel because she hasn't grown up with him and that Sterling is still an infant so he's not yet as easy to engage with. Those I could understand. But denying Hazzel a treat when he gives Dustin one and ignoring both children when Dustin is over and unacceptable.

Haylee needs to realize that the best thing for Hazzel is not having a father figure (who is probably eventually going to leave), but having a stable home life. It would be a much better lesson if Haylee left and told Hazzel that she doesn't deserve to be treated that way and they will figure out life with just the three of them. I know she's probably staying with Dann at this point because she needs him financially, but it would be so much better if she found a way to get her own place and stay single for at least several years, if not until Hazzel is in high school and has more of an independent life. She's teaching Hazzel that it's okay to be treated like crap (Haylee says she won't stand for it, but unless she has a serious discussion with Dann and things actually change or she leaves, nothing is going to change), that it's okay to be gaslighted by a partner (Dann telling Haylee she is seeing things that aren't there), and that Hazzel and Sterling have less value than Dustin.

Haylee, get out of that relationship and show Hazzel that her life is actually worth something and that she and Sterling are the focus of your life, not some man that treats all of you terribly!
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Re: Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

Unread post by jellybean »

"He isn't a bad guy" is exactly what she said about Randy before eventually deciding that he actually was a bad guy. Blending families is hard but that wouldn't be acceptable to me, Hazzel already gets the short end of the stick in all of it without being made to feel unloved.


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