Phil and Alex: Struggling With Maternity After Laboring For Eternity | Part 10

[sondraK]

I feel like P&A are missing the point. The BEST thing for Cassidy isn’t breastfeeding. The BEST thing for her is going in to heart surgery at the ideal weight.


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I agree.She could give C the bm after surg.
Also,why is she pumping so much,if C isn't taking much,if any of it? It not necessary;bf works by supply n demand.I guess she wants to look like the dairy Queen of bf

[IVFwarrior]

I really hope Phil steps up and does the right thing for his child. If he doesn’t she will die. It’s not just about weight gain. If Cassidy doesn’t have adequate nutrition, her tissues will be even more delicate, there is a much higher chance she’ll die on the operating table. All so Alex can fulfil her dream. WAKE UP PHIL

About 5% of babies die from this condition. Not necessarily straight after surgery, but in the months that follow. This might sound like a small number, but it's huge, because the 5% isn't spread evenly around. Out of 20 parents going through the same thing, 19 families get to take their baby home, but 1 family has to arrange a funeral. Every decision Alex makes, increases the likelihood that they will be the one. Someone has to be it...Sadly, I don't think Phil has the balls - even if he can see it - to stand up to Alex. He'll do a whole lot of mental gymnastics to convince himself that everything will work out fine because it's easier than confronting Alex.

Yes,if Phil confronted Alex,a bomb would go off! Never question a narc.But he needs to now.C's life is at stake.He nees to step up n do the right thing

Agreed. He needs to step up.

I know so many people like Phil who don't realise their spouse was a narcissist when they married them, because at that stage they were the golden child and the spouse treated them like a king. Until, just like narcs do, they start to despise you bc you no longer meet their needs and you've outlived their usefulness.

I imagine he's spent many years - particularly since Alex found out his sperm was dodgy - being belittled, made to feel worthless, and being told that he's lucky to have a wife at all and that no one else would want him. It would be feeding his meek mouse personality. But at the end of the day, he's still enabling her and her mental health issue. We're complete strangers and we can see what she's like through a tiny snapshot of videos which undoubtably show off the best of Alex. Yet he sees all of it - there is no way he can't see that she is emotionally abusing them all, and that this has flow on effects in regards to medical neglect. If he chooses to continue to enable Alex in harming their daughter, then he is equally complicit.

These people were given a 4-6 month lifeline to get their daughter big and strong for surgery. And handed the biggest dose of good fortune ever with not needing the coarc surgery. Yet here we are, nearly 3 months in, and it's still the crunchy granola NPD Alex clown show, with the emotionally abused enabler husband standing on the sidelines.

[IVFwarrior]

I just want to echo the sentiments that a number of other people have already expressed.

I watch a few youtube channels mostly because I find the pathetic attention seeking behaviour entertaining to watch.

But the Phil and Alex channel is not entertaining. Not even one bit. This is distressing medical neglect on display before our eyes.

[Elliecat]

I just want to echo the sentiments that a number of other people have already expressed.

I watch a few youtube channels mostly because I find the pathetic attention seeking behaviour entertaining to watch.

But the Phil and Alex channel is not entertaining. Not even one bit. This is distressing medical neglect on display before our eyes.

I haven’t watched one of their vlogs since the birth one. Initially because I can’t watch NICU things due to our own experience, but then because I found their instagrams and stories so disturbing that I couldn’t bear to see it drawn out.


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[JeasicaA71184]

Which one of you savages reached out to Katie (without a crystal ball) on her live chat to investigate Phil and Alex?

Y’all get brownie points lol

[theshamanisright1]

I just want to echo the sentiments that a number of other people have already expressed.

I watch a few youtube channels mostly because I find the pathetic attention seeking behaviour entertaining to watch.

But the Phil and Alex channel is not entertaining. Not even one bit. This is distressing medical neglect on display before our eyes.

I haven’t watched one of their vlogs since the birth one. Initially because I can’t watch NICU things due to our own experience, but then because I found their instagrams and stories so disturbing that I couldn’t bear to see it drawn out.


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I'm the same. Couldn't do it

[Haulnarse]

Which one of you savages reached out to Katie (without a crystal ball) on her live chat to investigate Phil and Alex?

Y’all get brownie points lol

Urgggg. Shes awful. So freaken cringy. Definitely not the best person to give this attention - she will fuck it up like everything else she has covered and make poor phil and alex look like the victims in this shit show.

[JeasicaA71184]

Which one of you savages reached out to Katie (without a crystal ball) on her live chat to investigate Phil and Alex?

Y’all get brownie points lol

Urgggg. Shes awful. So freaken cringy. Definitely not the best person to give this attention - she will fuck it up like everything else she has covered and make poor phil and alex look like the victims in this shit show.

She likes the clout for sure however I’m absolutely open to any tea channel opening up the conversation to how unethical these 2 are. Considering us in the adoption world have been wanting to blow the cab open on these 2 for years and not one single person has wanted to listen - this May very well get people talking

Same with myka. Has there been one gossip outlet (besides here) that has opened up the conversation about Phil and Alex? Because if not than I absolutely think this would be a great opportunity.

[IVFwarrior]

Which one of you savages reached out to Katie (without a crystal ball) on her live chat to investigate Phil and Alex?

Y’all get brownie points lol

Urgggg. Shes awful. So freaken cringy. Definitely not the best person to give this attention - she will fuck it up like everything else she has covered and make poor phil and alex look like the victims in this shit show.

She likes the clout for sure however I’m absolutely open to any tea channel opening up the conversation to how unethical these 2 are. Considering us in the adoption world have been wanting to blow the cab open on these 2 for years and not one single person has wanted to listen - this May very well get people talking

Same with myka. Has there been one gossip outlet (besides here) that has opened up the conversation about Phil and Alex? Because if not than I absolutely think this would be a great opportunity.

I don't know who Katie without a crystal ball is, but Phil and Alex are some of the smartest influencers out there - they have literally created an army of believers that do their dirty work for them and protect them. For instance, they have remained silent about Myka Stauffer, still have the Huxley videos up, plus videos where Alex describes Myka as her best friend. This has been raised a few times over in the cancel the Stauffer FB group, and the dogpiling that followed those comments was intense. There seems to be hundreds of people that will call Myka despicable, but defend Alex as the most loving and beautiful soul and amazing adoptee mom, and who is allowed a free pass in her continued friendship with Myka bc she has a critically ill newborn to look after...

The fact that they have even gotten away with their fraudulent not-for-profit for this long amazes me.

[In the middle]

I can’t even with this bitch. ‘First year with a different experience’ on national rainbow day?? Omfg she is DISGUSTING and Kinsley and Callie should be removed from her ‘care’. She is a fucking terrible mother and has failed all three of those girls. Far out she makes me angry!!!

[Maite5]

I can’t even with this bitch. ‘First year with a different experience’ on national rainbow day?? Omfg she is DISGUSTING and Kinsley and Callie should be removed from her ‘care’. She is a fucking terrible mother and has failed all three of those girls. Far out she makes me angry!!!

Ohhh is that you on the comments ? If yes well done !! There is another comment about feeding her baby and stop being obsessed with breastfeeding haha Finally


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[Maite5]

Feed your babt comments have now been deleted but Alex is addressing the one above


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[In the middle]

Feed your babt comments have now been deleted but Alex is addressing the one above


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Yeah she deleted the ‘feed your baby’ comments (which were great!!) but replied to mine. She’s such a fucking fool and so are all her fan girls. If she blocks me now we’ll know she reads here

[FlowersTar 68]

I'm still not sure why she's calling Cassidy a rainbow baby, as far as I remember she's never had a baby that's stuck.
Above poster, well done for the comments on her IG. I wish I'd read the feed your baby comments too

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[In the middle]

It was more the ‘8 years ago’ comment that bothered me. 3 babies in 8 years sounds like something to be extremely grateful for to me

[Beebee405]

Which one of you savages reached out to Katie (without a crystal ball) on her live chat to investigate Phil and Alex?

Y’all get brownie points lol

It was me!!! I wish there was more outlets to talk crap about them. Ha


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[HashtagBlessed]

How is Cassidy a "rainbow baby" after numerous failed transfers, but Kinsley and Callie are somehow not "rainbow babies" after years of infertility? I didn't realize rainbow baby only refers to baby after miscarriage, but not baby after infertility? As a lay person, I assumed that Kinsley would be her first rainbow baby if she wanted to use that term.

The people who defend Alex are just as sick as she is. Good grief.

It could not be more clear that she values her biological child above her adopted children. She makes that more obvious every day with dumb inatagram posts, like the one proclaiming that Cassidy is her first rainbow baby. She royally messed up with that post, and now she's trying to defend herself by insisting the term is only used after miscarriage.

[honeynlemon]

Not defending them, because even her followers are trying to say this child is more special because she got to experience pregnancy and breastfeeding, but rainbow baby (as far as I know) is specific to a child born after a pregnancy or infant loss. I assume she’s counting her “twin boys” as the miscarriage. however, the post still implies that Cassidy’s newborn experience is somehow more meaningful than the girls’.

[HashtagBlessed]

And she edited her caption. She's still implying it, but the caption no longer states that this is their first year with a rainbow baby.

Not a member of that community, but my understanding was that a rainbow baby refers to having a child after a "storm," whether that's the loss of a child or infertility. Considering it's a term coined in 2008 in a collection of short stories about medically necessary abortions, that then became popular on internet forums where the "storm" refers to miscarriage, a stillbirth, or other loss of a child (but not necessarily a medically needed abortion), I think it's a fairly fluid term that people can choose to identify with or not. But very telling in my opinion to identify with it for your biological child born during infertility, but not your adopted children.

[IVFwarrior]

And she edited her caption. She's still implying it, but the caption no longer states that this is their first year with a rainbow baby.

Not a member of that community, but my understanding was that a rainbow baby refers to having a child after a "storm," whether that's the loss of a child or infertility. Considering it's a term coined in 2008 in a collection of short stories about medically necessary abortions, that then became popular on internet forums where the "storm" refers to miscarriage, a stillbirth, or other loss of a child (but not necessarily a medically needed abortion), I think it's a fairly fluid term that people can choose to identify with or not. But very telling in my opinion to identify with it for your biological child born during infertility, but not your adopted children.

Interesting history.

I agree it's very telling. Even more so because Alex tried to justify over on IG that Kinsley and Callie came before her miscarriage and therefore can't be considered rainbow babies. But they did come AFTER she was already suffering from infertility. If the definition is fluid, she could have chosen to identify her loss as her infertility and many years of trying, and her rainbow baby as Kinsley. Instead, she has defined her loss as the miscarriage of her 11-12 week "twins" that we all know was actually a 6 week gestation singleton that never developed a heartbeat. And not to say that a 6 week loss is not incredibly heartbreaking. I guess I'm just trying to articulate that her feelings of loss and subsequent fulfilment are very much centred on her bio loss and bio live birth. Her two adopted babies don't fulfil her.