Hayleeandfamily: Messy Divorce, New Baby Daddy Remorse | Part #5

[jellybean]

She went live on instagram and wasn't super specific but basically said that she and Dann are working on their relationship and both have a lot to work on. She just kinda gave bits and pieces on that but would stop or trail off. He blames himself for her suicide attempt which is natural. She also said her parents were the ones who found her after the attempt and that she had sent the kids to their house a few days before because she was feeling so depressed. From what I could understand she sent them there then tried to overdose on pills but "didn't take enough", was out of it all the next day and then the third day overdosed on even more pills and alcohol to try to be successful at it. She walked around a park after the second overdose to try and die there so nobody she knew would have the trauma of finding her but then eventually went back home. Dann was at work but became worried and asked her parents to check on her. Hazzel thinks that Haylee was "at the doctor for panic attacks".


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[storeynyx]

She went live on instagram and wasn't super specific but basically said that she and Dann are working on their relationship and both have a lot to work on. She just kinda gave bits and pieces on that but would stop or trail off. He blames himself for her suicide attempt which is natural. She also said her parents were the ones who found her after the attempt and that she had sent the kids to their house a few days before because she was feeling so depressed. From what I could understand she sent them there then tried to overdose on pills but "didn't take enough", was out of it all the next day and then the third day overdosed on even more pills and alcohol to try to be successful at it. She walked around a park after the second overdose to try and die there so nobody she knew would have the trauma of finding her but then eventually went back home. Dann was at work but became worried and asked her parents to check on her. Hazzel thinks that Haylee was "at the doctor for panic attacks".


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Jesus, that’s sad. The girl is so damaged, and seemingly has no support for her mental health. She knows first hand how a parent killing themself can fuck you up, but she still thinks repeating the cycle is a better option than living. Poor Hazzel, she’s also going to grow up with serious issues - her dad and replacement dad both just disappearing out of her life, and her mum’s poor mental health - I hope the child is in therapy.


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[Maxxinsta96]

I’m sure her dad is fed up with her. I remember in the life update or whatever the vlog was that she said he couldn’t even look at her. I can see her stepmom wanting haylee to move back in and her dad saying no. I do think she’s stupid for trying to work things out with dann. She’s clearly dependent on a man. Just the face he ignores and does not treat hazzel the same as his own kid is enough reason not to put up with him. I think she said he even treats sterling different. Maybe he really liked dustins mom and that’s why? Idk what the reasoning is. Maybe haylee was just a booty call that was never meant to go any further than that and now he resents her

[GimmedoughnitsIneed]

I really hope Haylee does not get back with Dann. I personally liked him when she first introduced him. But him and his family not treating Hazzel right is unacceptable. Maybe right now he feels guilty about the suicide attempt but did he not see how depressed she was before? They live in the same house! I know we don't know Dann's side but he could have been more supportive. Even before she opened up about Dann's baised treatment towards Hazzel and even the baby, it was clear that he didn't have a warm relationship with Dann.
I hope Haylee understands that even if he feels guilty now, it won't turn him into a new leaf overnight.

[NigheanDonn]

I'm not sure how Haylee's family is when it comes to mental health. Obviously we on the outside can't fully know. But I keep wondering if they aren't aware of how to handle it. With everything that was going on in Haylee's life in such a short amount of time, both they and Dann should have been more aware of how this could affect her. Maybe they don't know the signs because sometimes it's not as obvious as people think. But I really think they should have been supporting her more through all of it, asking how she was doing with each new change that happened. And maybe they did. But her dad sounds like he does the opposite (when she said he can't even look at her right now, he's making it about it him, that it makes him uncomfortable, but really it should be about Haylee's healing). Maybe I just feel too strongly about this because of my own experience with family members who try to say "oh you're fine, you shouldn't feel that way," or even "mental health doesn't affect you physically." Ugh.

Anyway, I hope she's getting the help that she needs and I know that process is not easy.

[storeynyx]

but she still thinks repeating the cycle is a better option than living.

Yes, that's how depression works. I don't think you fully understand how some mental illness, especially such severe mental illness, works. People with depression often feel that people would be better off without them. This includes even parents of small children who know they're dependent on them. They may feel that they're not a good enough parent anyway and that someone else would take better care of them even if the parent themselves is financially stable, involved, and loving.

Also, mental illness is absolutely hereditary. It's possible she unfortunately inherited some of her mothers. It's also very likely that, understandably, the trauma of losing a parent to suicide and the following events after (dad remarrying, new siblings) has been both devastating and overwhelming and has severely effected her mentally, emotionally, and her ability to cope with life.

People often call suicide selfish because of kids/family, but they don't realise the head space a lot of people are actually in when deciding to do such a severe thing. She literally went somewhere else so her family wouldn't have the trauma of finding her. Mental illness is an incredibly complex thing that not even experts fully understand yet.

If you’re going to make a habit of lecturing people, it may serve you well not to assume the basis of knowledge of random strangers on the internet. Don’t tell me what I do or do not understand about mental illness. I was born to two parents with severe mental health issues, and the only reason I wasn’t aborted was because my family thought I’d be of use to care for my mother. I have also studied mental health at a university level, but I’m here in my free time to talk nonsense, and not in a professional capacity.

What I said was it’s sad that she feels the cycle is worth repeating. I didn’t say she doesn’t have any reason to be depressed, or that she should snap out of it, or anything of the sort. I said it’s sad how messed up she is, and that my heart breaks for her child, who will likely face the same issues.


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[Lolislol26]

but she still thinks repeating the cycle is a better option than living.

Yes, that's how depression works. I don't think you fully understand how some mental illness, especially such severe mental illness, works. People with depression often feel that people would be better off without them. This includes even parents of small children who know they're dependent on them. They may feel that they're not a good enough parent anyway and that someone else would take better care of them even if the parent themselves is financially stable, involved, and loving.

Also, mental illness is absolutely hereditary. It's possible she unfortunately inherited some of her mothers. It's also very likely that, understandably, the trauma of losing a parent to suicide and the following events after (dad remarrying, new siblings) has been both devastating and overwhelming and has severely effected her mentally, emotionally, and her ability to cope with life.

People often call suicide selfish because of kids/family, but they don't realise the head space a lot of people are actually in when deciding to do such a severe thing. She literally went somewhere else so her family wouldn't have the trauma of finding her. Mental illness is an incredibly complex thing that not even experts fully understand yet.

If you’re going to make a habit of lecturing people, it may serve you well not to assume the basis of knowledge of random strangers on the internet. Don’t tell me what I do or do not understand about mental illness. I was born to two parents with severe mental health issues, and the only reason I wasn’t aborted was because my family thought I’d be of use to care for my mother. I have also studied mental health at a university level, but I’m here in my free time to talk nonsense, and not in a professional capacity.

What I said was it’s sad that she feels the cycle is worth repeating. I didn’t say she doesn’t have any reason to be depressed, or that she should snap out of it, or anything of the sort. I said it’s sad how messed up she is, and that my heart breaks for her child, who will likely face the same issues.


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No. What is said is “but she still thinks repeating the cycle is a better option than living” indicating that you don’t understand.

[FueledByIcedCoffee]

I’m not quoting anyone cause I don’t want to start anything (nor do I want the emails that I’ve been getting every time someone quotes me lmao) but depression is different for everyone. Everyone reacts different.

Hers sounds like it was so bad that she didn’t have a choice. Yes, I’m aware. People always have a choice. But it’s something that can get the better of you. When my episodes hit, I claw/scratch the crap out of my thighs to rip away skin. I know it’s bad, and I know it’s not something I should be doing but it happens anyways.

If haylee was in her right mind, she wouldn’t have done it. Bad decisions or not, we see how much she loves Hazzel.

So people need to stop BLAMING her for this when the only thing she needs is help and support.


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[ThisIsMeCeej]

I’m not quoting anyone cause I don’t want to start anything (nor do I want the emails that I’ve been getting every time someone quotes me lmao) but depression is different for everyone. Everyone reacts different.

Hers sounds like it was so bad that she didn’t have a choice. Yes, I’m aware. People always have a choice. But it’s something that can get the better of you. When my episodes hit, I claw/scratch the crap out of my thighs to rip away skin. I know it’s bad, and I know it’s not something I should be doing but it happens anyways.

If haylee was in her right mind, she wouldn’t have done it. Bad decisions or not, we see how much she loves Hazzel.

So people need to stop BLAMING her for this when the only thing she needs is help and support.


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(you can change in your preferences to not get emails I believe? I don't receive any)

I agree with everything you've said!

[GimmedoughnitsIneed]

Not going to quote but I completely agree with the previous poster. Depression hits everyone differently and I understand how down Haylee must have felt in that moment. I hope she is getting support from her family and with the help she is seeking I think she will come out of this stronger

[strikeaposie]

She's camping now, I wonder if the kids are with her, if she's with Dann or if this is a friends trip.

I do hope she's getting proper help, a friend of mind tried to kill himself and he got out of therapy fairly early by stating he regretted his decision to try to kill himself...and I just, I love him dearly and he is doing much better now, but I just think it was wrong to let him out of therapy early.

[FueledByIcedCoffee]

I’m not quoting anyone cause I don’t want to start anything (nor do I want the emails that I’ve been getting every time someone quotes me lmao) but depression is different for everyone. Everyone reacts different.

Hers sounds like it was so bad that she didn’t have a choice. Yes, I’m aware. People always have a choice. But it’s something that can get the better of you. When my episodes hit, I claw/scratch the crap out of my thighs to rip away skin. I know it’s bad, and I know it’s not something I should be doing but it happens anyways.

If haylee was in her right mind, she wouldn’t have done it. Bad decisions or not, we see how much she loves Hazzel.

So people need to stop BLAMING her for this when the only thing she needs is help and support.


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This is basically what I was going to reply to Storey so thank you. I just found it incredibly distasteful that people are blaming Haylee for her mental illness and attempt, especially when we know her enough of her family's history. Haylee's mum had kids too and it doesn't mean for a second that she loved them any less because she chose to end her life. I wasn't trying to lecture anyone. There's a difference between understanding the science of psychology and having empathy for people have experienced similar situations to you.

The thing is people look at Haylee and think ‘well I suffer from depression and I don’t react how she does’ cause they only know their experiences, which I get. But I’m not going to pretend to know everything about every single persons case of depression lol I know how mine works and mine only. People need to remember that depression is like snowflakes - every single one is different

But some of those people also like to act like know it alls, that they know every little thing that others are thinking.

I’m hoping Haylee does what she needs to get better for her and her kids. I won’t judge her for her mental health cause she can’t control that. But I’m gonna hella judge her for deciding to stay with a man who doesn’t value her daughter or even own son as an equal to his other kid.
(If anyone is curious, she stated that Dann ignores Hazzel and Sterling when dustin is around)


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[strikeaposie]

The video of Hazzel meeting Sterling for the first time played through, and my heart! That kid is so sweet. She was talking to gently and sweetly as to not wake Sterling.

[sleep84]

What were her sex kinks, besides some bdsm and anal? did she say? she sounded so tame a few years ago, now she is all sexed up.

[ThisIsMeCeej]

Haylee posted on IG that Dann sent Hazzel a cute Unicorn flower arrangement. I know Haylee said that Dann treats Hazzel well when it's just Hazzel and Sterling, but I wonder if he's working on how he treats Hazzel and Sterling when Dustin is there as well? I know that would help a lot with how Haylee is feeling, cause that has to wear on her.

I also wanna say I am glad that she's having Hazzel do distance learning, for right now. I know some may disagree... but, with how Hazzel's health was with her (was it her liver or kidney?? I think kidney but, I may be wrong).. I would personally feel best to have her home if I was Haylee, with what's going on. I wonder if at some point they would have Dustin do his schooling from Dann and Haylee's, since she's home? (Sorry if my thoughts are rambled... I have a bad headache atm).

[strikeaposie]

Haylee posted on IG that Dann sent Hazzel a cute Unicorn flower arrangement. I know Haylee said that Dann treats Hazzel well when it's just Hazzel and Sterling, but I wonder if he's working on how he treats Hazzel and Sterling when Dustin is there as well? I know that would help a lot with how Haylee is feeling, cause that has to wear on her.

I also wanna say I am glad that she's having Hazzel do distance learning, for right now. I know some may disagree... but, with how Hazzel's health was with her (was it her liver or kidney?? I think kidney but, I may be wrong).. I would personally feel best to have her home if I was Haylee, with what's going on. I wonder if at some point they would have Dustin do his schooling from Dann and Haylee's, since she's home? (Sorry if my thoughts are rambled... I have a bad headache atm).

That was a really, really cute bouquet of flowers too. I wonder if the horn and ears are actually a headband, because if it is then kudos to the flower shop because that would be awesome for little unicorn loving kids.

[aly]

Haylee re-admitted herself to the hospital. Poor Hazzel must be so confused right now

[nutbagmcgee]

She just posted a ton on Instagram yesterday. How strange.

[strikeaposie]

Damn, I was hoping they were getting into a good routine. I hope she's okay. I do feel for her going through all this. I work in a law office and we've had a lot of issues and cases with domestic cases due to people not receiving their medication for a variety of reasons. It's not a good time. I feel bad for the children.

[PissedOutDQ]

I feel so bad for her and her kids. Everything medical is a mess with COVID backing everything up. At least I hope that's what she means by not taking her meds for two weeks.

Sometimes people feel fine again and stop taking their meds. Hope that wasn't the case.