LucyLucyAppleJuicy wrote: ↑Thu Oct 15, 2020 4:26 am
DarthMama wrote: ↑Wed Oct 14, 2020 4:58 pm
sondraK wrote: ↑Wed Oct 14, 2020 4:30 pm
I enjoyed seeing the girls dance n have fun as well,although I also thought Alex was being too rough w a heart/gi reflux baby
I have mixed feelings about it. I'm happy she got the silly fun time with the girls and happy memories they can have of her. But on the flip side how much was it her forced on herself to do it on camera because of what she's reading here how she's very cold and distant from the girls. Also why couldn't grammy taken Cass and held her in the chair or couch while Alex bounced around on camera.
It was so fake that I’m now inside out from having cringed so much
I agree, definitely fake. Classic narc behaviour, put on a show! Let the outside world see how fun, carefree and cool you are, especially with your kids. That way there's less general doubt about you and your parenting. You couldn't possibly be nasty, cold and manipulative, look at you dancing in the kitchen! She was being so over the top, and too rough with Cassidy (she's not important here obviously).
And the other commenter is right, look at the kids. That's how you know. You can usually spot narcissistic parents by looking at the kids and how they behave, with and without that parent around. Obviously we have a limited (and curated) view of the family. But you still get a glimpse, and sometimes that's enough to see what's going on. In that dancing bit you can see how uncomfortable and confused the kids are. That kind of behaviour from Alex definitely isn't natural for them.
As a child of a narc parent, I recognise this thing which is kinda hard to explain. But when you are a child and victim of narcissistic abuse, the outbursts you're subjected to stick with you. While the narc parent swings between moods, you remain really cautious. It's hard to let loose or enjoy yourself even in the good moments, because you're either still stuck in the trauma of the last outburst or anticipating the next one, or both. It's survival mode. You still participate enough so as to not attract too much attention ("why are you in a mood! We're having fun! Oh come on...") and just go along with it. Narcs are easily offended and get defensive, situations can go south real quick. So it's important to appease them and just co-operate.
You can see in those girls eyes sometimes that they really are quite unstable and just trying to figure out what's going on. Like they're scared of Alex. That story video where Alex was "playing", chasing one girl into a closet, she looked genuinely freaked out and couldn't tell if Alex was playing or actually mad. To be fair, Alex was sounding real mad.
Idk, the more I see the more I'm convinced that Alex is the bad type of narcissist. I feel awful for those kids, being raised by a narcissistic parent can be very very hard. There's definitely a side to Alex that she doesn't want us to see, it pops out occasionally though.