Phil and Alex: Struggling With Maternity After Laboring For Eternity | Part 10

[citbcitw]

alexpostaboutcassidy.jpg

Not only is this cringey AF, but it's a clear example parentification (the process of role reversal whereby a child is obliged to act as parent to their own parent or sibling, wikipedia, reference link below). Cassidy is ALREADY being used to soothe Alex's emotions and feelings, even before she has the ability to talk!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parentification

[citbcitw]

It makes me so sad that the girls have to grow up with a mother like this. The silver lining of all of this is that they'll have the videos and posts to go back to when they're older (and in therapy), trying to make sense of it all. As someone who grew up with a narcissistic mother who shared similar characteristics to Alex, it would be a lot easier having actual footage of what occurred when I was younger. Again, the ideal situation would be for this to not happen at all, but I hope it will be easier for them to quickly identify patterns and process their feelings when they're on their own.

[IVFwarrior]

Is it’s just me or is her instagram post that she just posted completely deranged?!?

Nope, not just you. That post was a really great example of how loopy and narcissistic Alex is.

[LucyLucyAppleJuicy]

Is it’s just me or is her instagram post that she just posted completely deranged?!?

Definitely not just you. I just came here to say the same thing. Then old Captain Puffy pops up to say ‘what a way with words’. Ok then Phil!

As someone married to a chd baby, now 32yo, I struggle to find anything good about this post. My husband still feels self conscious about his scars.

Exactly. Just the most peculiar thing to write.

[DarthMama]

It was so fake that I’m now inside out from having cringed so much

I agree, definitely fake. Classic narc behaviour, put on a show! Let the outside world see how fun, carefree and cool you are, especially with your kids. That way there's less general doubt about you and your parenting. You couldn't possibly be nasty, cold and manipulative, look at you dancing in the kitchen! She was being so over the top, and too rough with Cassidy (she's not important here obviously).

And the other commenter is right, look at the kids. That's how you know. You can usually spot narcissistic parents by looking at the kids and how they behave, with and without that parent around. Obviously we have a limited (and curated) view of the family. But you still get a glimpse, and sometimes that's enough to see what's going on. In that dancing bit you can see how uncomfortable and confused the kids are. That kind of behaviour from Alex definitely isn't natural for them.

As a child of a narc parent, I recognise this thing which is kinda hard to explain. But when you are a child and victim of narcissistic abuse, the outbursts you're subjected to stick with you. While the narc parent swings between moods, you remain really cautious. It's hard to let loose or enjoy yourself even in the good moments, because you're either still stuck in the trauma of the last outburst or anticipating the next one, or both. It's survival mode. You still participate enough so as to not attract too much attention ("why are you in a mood! We're having fun! Oh come on...") and just go along with it. Narcs are easily offended and get defensive, situations can go south real quick. So it's important to appease them and just co-operate.

You can see in those girls eyes sometimes that they really are quite unstable and just trying to figure out what's going on. Like they're scared of Alex. That story video where Alex was "playing", chasing one girl into a closet, she looked genuinely freaked out and couldn't tell if Alex was playing or actually mad. To be fair, Alex was sounding real mad.

Idk, the more I see the more I'm convinced that Alex is the bad type of narcissist. I feel awful for those kids, being raised by a narcissistic parent can be very very hard. There's definitely a side to Alex that she doesn't want us to see, it pops out occasionally though.

I came here to say exactly this. Alex's over-the-top theatrics are what make this uncomfortable to watch. Dance parties in the kitchen should be about the girls, but then here comes Alex with a baby strapped to her chest making a huge spectacle out of herself, because it was about her all along.

Oh I realize how fake it was and put on for the camera. That's why I said mixed feelings, because this can be one of the few happy memories the girls have with her.

[In the middle]

What in the fuck? She’s lost her mind

[DarthMama]

Definitely not just you. I just came here to say the same thing. Then old Captain Puffy pops up to say ‘what a way with words’. Ok then Phil!

As someone married to a chd baby, now 32yo, I struggle to find anything good about this post. My husband still feels self conscious about his scars.

Exactly. Just the most peculiar thing to write.

It's beyond odd. She seems to feel it's some sort of badge she'll get not Cass.

[RottieMama]

Hey guys! It’s almost time for a new thread! Please comment your title suggestions down below, and the one with the most “likes/thanks” by tomorrow afternoon, will be selected!

[IVFwarrior]

New title suggestion:

Boob juice infatuation and heart defect exploitation.

[GGF1987]

Is it’s just me or is her instagram post that she just posted completely deranged?!?

Yeah that post was really really disturbing! I read it 3 times trying to make it now so insane but...it's completely insane. That baby is about go through something super rough and painful and scary even if she won't remember it. It's not about you Alex! Stop making everything about you!

[In the middle]

Is it’s just me or is her instagram post that she just posted completely deranged?!?

Yeah that post was really really disturbing! I read it 3 times trying to make it now so insane but...it's completely insane. That baby is about go through something super rough and painful and scary even if she won't remember it. It's not about you Alex! Stop making everything about you!

100% this! Having your child go under anaesthetic for any reason is scary as hell, but Cassidy is having MAJOR surgery, she’s going into it underweight and weak, and even in the best of circumstances there is no guarantee that she will survive the surgery. I’m not saying that Alex should be losing her shit, but her being so nonchalant about OHS really irks me. The scar is the least of her worries right now.
Wake the fuck up Alex!!

[LucyLucyAppleJuicy]

Hey guys! It’s almost time for a new thread! Please comment your title suggestions down below, and the one with the most “likes/thanks” by tomorrow afternoon, will be selected!

My baby’s having open heart surgery, I’ll still find a way to make it all about me

[LucyLucyAppleJuicy]

Is it’s just me or is her instagram post that she just posted completely deranged?!?

Yeah that post was really really disturbing! I read it 3 times trying to make it now so insane but...it's completely insane. That baby is about go through something super rough and painful and scary even if she won't remember it. It's not about you Alex! Stop making everything about you!

100% this! Having your child go under anaesthetic for any reason is scary as hell, but Cassidy is having MAJOR surgery, she’s going into it underweight and weak, and even in the best of circumstances there is no guarantee that she will survive the surgery. I’m not saying that Alex should be losing her shit, but her being so nonchalant about OHS really irks me. The scar is the least of her worries right now.
Wake the fuck up Alex!!

It’s so fucked up. There’s 10 sentences in that post, 7 of them relate directly to Alex

[goshiper]

Is it’s just me or is her instagram post that she just posted completely deranged?!?

Don’t worry, it’s not just you. She’s completely lost her mind. The secondhand cringe is awful.

[Haulnarse]

Phil & Alex: Re-writing History, Alex’s Pity Me & Heart Repair for Cassidy

[PinkMoscato]

Phil and Alex: The Godly Tits & Fake Crying Fits

[isthisnormal]

TITLE

Woah is me, couldn't care less about baby C

[Dani_465]

She’s a whackadoodle! Recording your daughter so you can hear her struggling to breathe (along with other noises) so you can listen to them while she’s intubated. I don’t know maybe it’ll help with her pumping.

Side note: Cassie has some color on today.

[LucyLucyAppleJuicy]

She’s a whackadoodle! Recording your daughter so you can hear her struggling to breathe (along with other noises) so you can listen to them while she’s intubated. I don’t know maybe it’ll help with her pumping.

Side note: Cassie has some color on today.

I understand stress can make you do odd things, but this takes the biscuit!

[Beebee405]

Phil and Alex: Mother Knows Breast

Phil and Alex: Breast is best