BumpsAlongTheWay Part 2

[Katieg2009]

For some people they don't want to remember their child that way, so they don't look. I think it's a situation where you need to feel what's right for you, and I feel she shouldn't be judged on that. I personally probably would have held my baby and had pictures if god forbid that happened to me, but some people just can't.

[kat427]

She opens a box they have for their stillborn in this video:

at the end around 2:49

[Katieg2009]

I do wish they would talk about it more, since that was the sole purpose of their channel. Like I've said before, I really like them and I'm happy they have Oliver, if just like to know more about Gabriel. I have suffered a miscarriage and I know when I had my first child after the miscarriage I sort of feeled guilty in away. Almost as if I replaced my child I miscarried. I was only around 8 weeks along when it happened but I still have many questions about it and would like to talk to someone who can relate, because not many people I know personally are open about it.

[Katieg2009]

Sorry for the typos, I'm on my phone and it keeps autocorrecting lol

[YumiYoko]

I don't judge anyone's grief.

If you are talking about the family tree from the nursery tour or whatever I thought that was weird too but then I remembered that a subscriber sent that too them so I figured that was probably why he wasn't included.

[pantiesinawad2]

Definitely not judging how they grieve the loss if their pregnancy/baby. I know that all grief comes and goes differently. But since their channel is "based" on their losses (they mention early on that the "bumps along he way" are in reference to their difficulty staying pregnant/losses) you would think that they would have talked about it more. And especially since they are documenting a subsequent pregnancy after loss. You would have thought she would have focused some videos in her thoughts and feelings about pregnancy after loss. It's like they forgot WHY they started their channel in the first place. Although I know most channels grow and evolve over time and usually stray from their main focus ( well in the ttc/mom community).

Anyways like I said I'm more if a lurker and not much of a poster. So in gonna leave it at that and get back to my lurking.

[Heartbreakcoverupxo]

I definitely don't judge how a person griefs either, my sister died of SIDS around 2 months of age and my parents won't even hang her photos on the wall or nothing. I can't even talk to my mom about it without her freaking out. Everybody's different and I will never question why they don't talk about it.

[ohaudrey]

What pisses me off, is that she still isn't owning up to the fact that she copied the intro. I'll give her credit for being polite in her messages, but until she owns up to the blatant copying, I'm standing firmly with Tweedle.

I agree. She was sweetly, politely dancing around he point.

[MichaelScarn]

about the grieving thing...
I actually found her videos at the beginning of her videos because I too had been going through what she had just gone through at the time. I remember that there was a link in the description of one of her talking about her losses video to a written blog that she had. I read through the whole thing and she was much more emotional there. She explained that she wasn't going to hold back what she really felt there like she would in person. It's very personal and was very touching. The link is probably still there on one of the videos from the beginning when they talked about losses. When she found out she was pregnant with Oliver she said that she was going to start a "project" and then bam she had a youtube channel and said she wouldn't be writing on there anymore. So I do think she grievs but just not openly.
But I do agree with what someone said, she's not really helping people anymore. She made a few videos about loss in the beginning but it's now a mommy and baby vlog channel. There's nothing wrong with that but it did kind of strike me as odd that they still claim to be a channel "helping" people when now it's mostly entertainment.
But that's just the kind of people they are I guess

[Amelia322]

He was 16 weeks when he passed away, she was induced at 20 weeks. I always thought stillbirths were 20weeks and up. And a baby passing away before that was a miscarriage..?

[sansasnark]

This whole thing is making me laugh because it reminds me so much of middle school when girls would literally end friendships over someone "stealing" their AIM profile or myspace song. Nothing better than people fighting over someone "copying" something they didn't really create in the first place. Shaking your hips and pointing to your video title is nobody's "intellectual property" and to try and report Missy's videos for copyright infringement is absurd. Cutesy belly shots are something that mommy bloggers have been doing long before youtube mommy vlogging was even a thing. Missy and Bryan get on my nerves a lot but that other vlogger sounds legit insane.

As far as them no longer helping other grieving parents, I actually think showing that there can be real happiness after such a loss is a hugely helpful thing.

[ladybug]

Yeah, 16 weeks IS a miscarriage, not a "stillbirth" like she loves to claim. Happens all the time unfortunately.

And I don't care about the messages that either sent to each other. You look at the facts and it's plain as day: Missy STOLE Tina's intro. I think if the shoes were on the other foot Missy would be quite pissed also.

[FLOSSY77]

Maybe she was confused because she delivered the baby? IDK. I don't trust them. And whoever said Missy's was different because she danced different and wrote her measurements..Uh not really different.

[loopdeloop]

He was 16 weeks when he passed away, she was induced at 20 weeks. I always thought stillbirths were 20weeks and up. And a baby passing away before that was a miscarriage..?

That's technically right, but her body obviously did not recognize that the baby had died until the technician discovered it at 20 weeks. Considering her emotional and physical pain, I understand why it would be called a stillbirth.

[staceymj]

He was 16 weeks when he passed away, she was induced at 20 weeks. I always thought stillbirths were 20weeks and up. And a baby passing away before that was a miscarriage..?

That's technically right, but her body obviously did not recognize that the baby had died until the technician discovered it at 20 weeks. Considering her emotional and physical pain, I understand why it would be called a stillbirth.

She did have to give birth so I would count it as a stillborn not a miscarriage

[ladybug]

Umm, I had a completely natural miscarriage at 12 weeks at home, contractions and everything. Is that a stillbirth also? No..

[surferbunny]

Yeah, 16 weeks IS a miscarriage, not a "stillbirth" like she loves to claim. Happens all the time unfortunately.

And I don't care about the messages that either sent to each other. You look at the facts and it's plain as day: Missy STOLE Tina's intro. I think if the shoes were on the other foot Missy would be quite pissed also.

Okay see I was umm uncomfortable to ask how far along she was when she had her stillborn baby... I heard she was less than 20 weeks multiple times, that is a miscarriage

I have been confused about this and like wth, if you are not pass viability it is not a stillborn! really curious why she claims she had a stillborn a fetus before 23 weeks has NO WAY of surviving out of the womb

of course as a pregnant woman I feel for her, she had a late miscarriage which must have been terrible to deal with but she really creeps me out now.. I thought for the longest she had a baby born sleeping full term

[Snarklover]

If you look up the definition of stillbirth from various sources, you'll see that the meaning varies quite a bit from site to site. Some say a loss before 20 weeks gestation, some say before 24 weeks gestation, and some just say "a baby born dead". It does seem kind of sneaky that they would call her loss a stillbirth when the baby died before 20 weeks gestation.

[ohgoodness]

Yeah, 16 weeks IS a miscarriage, not a "stillbirth" like she loves to claim. Happens all the time unfortunately.

And I don't care about the messages that either sent to each other. You look at the facts and it's plain as day: Missy STOLE Tina's intro. I think if the shoes were on the other foot Missy would be quite pissed also.

Okay see I was umm uncomfortable to ask how far along she was when she had her stillborn baby... I heard she was less than 20 weeks multiple times, that is a miscarriage

I have been confused about this and like wth, if you are not pass viability it is not a stillborn! really curious why she claims she had a stillborn a fetus before 23 weeks has NO WAY of surviving out of the womb

of course as a pregnant woman I feel for her, she had a late miscarriage which must have been terrible to deal with but she really creeps me out now.. I thought for the longest she had a baby born sleeping full term

Can you better explain what you're talking about because it sounds like you've got your information mixed up a little bit or I may have read wrong. Stillbirth is considered after more than twenty weeks not after viability. Viability is at 24 weeks when the baby has a chance of surviving out of the womb but there are some cases where babies were born before
that and survived. If her baby died at 16 weeks then maybe it wasn't a stillbirth but maybe her doctors called it that since was still was 20 weeks when she gave birth. Either way, it's still a sad thing to go through no matter how many far along you are. I've been there. I lost my daughter at 22 + 6 pregnant.

[ohgoodness]

Maybe she was confused because she delivered the baby? IDK. I don't trust them. And whoever said Missy's was different because she danced different and wrote her measurements..Uh not really different.

People need to look up the word similar. It doesn't mean she had the exact same thing but she was damn sure very close.