Off-Topic Banter Part 2

[placebo]

I'm also a former.. well, can't say former, since in a way, it's an addiction like any.. Anyway, I used to cut. Haven't for years. I really wish that you wouldn't do that to yourself Ashley. You are better, you deserve better and you will get better.

It's a hard habit (coping mechanism) to put to rest, I know, but by doing this to yourself, you aren't actually solving anything. Just momentary relief. Try to be surrounded with people who care about you, and buy a rubber wrist band. Snap it against your wrist instead of cutting.

[subject99]

Most days I do it. Not weekends though usually i do not know why. It's always when I've been alone for awhile.. Or when I've had a nightmare about my ex. Basically I'm forced to relive the horrible parts of my past relationship on a nightly basis.

Cutting is like having an obsessive compulsive disorder. Cutting becomes an obsession. All the trama that had happened and taking it out in yourself. Have you thought about seeking some counselling?

[thegooseiscooked]

I'm not ignoring your post Ashley but I just don't know what to say.

I have no experience of this at all and don't want to say anything to upset you further.

I'm glad someone on here is able to relate, not that Im glad placebo did that .....oh.....you know what I mean.

I hope you find some help xx

[thegooseiscooked]

Finnish Santa is the original Santa.

(And finnish drinking culture is actually quite disgusting)

Oh, I know our Santa is fake. My sister once worked as a Santa's Elf in a shop and "Santa" felt her up in the tea room.

[placebo]

I have work to go to, but if you want to, PM me Ashley.

And Goosey, ew! Finnish Santa is better. I promise. No nasty old pervert. Well, nasty, but not a pervert

[thegooseiscooked]

You can join my boyfriend in the corner of not knowing what to say

Well one thing I would suggest is try to find a way that he can help you. He probably feels very shut out, frustrated and confused (wait, he's not the abusive one, right?)

[whatsername_]

You guys can come stay in my beach condo with me. We can surf and drink orange juice straight from the tree.
Just stick a few straws in.
Disneyworld is in my backyard and all.

[subject99]

Most days I do it. Not weekends though usually i do not know why. It's always when I've been alone for awhile.. Or when I've had a nightmare about my ex. Basically I'm forced to relive the horrible parts of my past relationship on a nightly basis.

Cutting is like having an obsessive compulsive disorder. Cutting becomes an obsession. All the trama that had happened and taking it out in yourself. Have you thought about seeking some counselling?

Kind of but I guess sometimes I tell myself that I'm making it worse than it is. That our relationship could have been so much worse, I could be dead for example, and that I should just hurry up and get over it.

Cutting is making the pain worse. You need to confront everything. From my experience from cutting it's just hiding behind a blanket and not confronting the deep issues/issues at hand. To better yourself, your future and future relationships. You must must must stop saying it could have been worse. What he did to you is worse. It shouldn't have been that bad at all! It is not your fault it happened. You do not need to speed it up. That is not your life plan. You are hear to over come this and become a better stronger person. You're correct, having medication is just a temporary solution. I think you should inquire about some counselling. Your school should be offering this for free and under the school insurance they will provide counselling. The only way you can beat thus is seeing a professional. Your boyfriend can support you at this point in time. He should be holding your hand the whole way through and walking beside you while you conquer this.

[whatsername_]

Ashley, from my tumblr it's pretty um... Clear... About my past.
And I'm very sorry, I wish I could help. But in all honesty, these posts are very triggering.
Now that I've said that, I'm going to not respond to anymore.
It's not that I don't care, or that I don't want to help...
I've jus recently gotten to an okay-ish place myself and I'm terrified of relapsing again.

I'm very sorry for sounding selfish.
Night ladies.

[thegooseiscooked]

You're in Fort Meyers? You know you're practically Lora's neighbour, right?

[whatsername_]

You guys can come stay in my beach condo with me. We can surf and drink orange juice straight from the tree.
Just stick a few straws in.
Disneyworld is in my backyard and all.

Didn't we discover you live very near my condo? I'm in fort Meyers where are you?

I'm in north east Florida. very close to southern Georgia.
st. Augustine area.

[thegooseiscooked]

Ashley, from my tumblr it's pretty um... Clear... About my past.
And I'm very sorry, I wish I could help. But in all honesty, these posts are very triggering.
Now that I've said that, I'm going to not respond to anymore.
It's not that I don't care, or that I don't want to help...
I've jus recently gotten to an okay-ish place myself and I'm terrified of relapsing again.

I'm very sorry for sounding selfish.
Night ladies.

Night Ashleigh, go to bed and have sweet dreams

[subject99]

Ashley, from my tumblr it's pretty um... Clear... About my past.
And I'm very sorry, I wish I could help. But in all honesty, these posts are very triggering.
Now that I've said that, I'm going to not respond to anymore.
It's not that I don't care, or that I don't want to help...
I've jus recently gotten to an okay-ish place myself and I'm terrified of relapsing again.

I'm very sorry for sounding selfish.
Night ladies.

You're not being selfish. You are being honest and doing the right thing for yourself. You are being smart and removing yourself from a situation that will trigger you. You're doing great with recovering. Keep up good work.

Have a good night.

[subject99]

I will look into counseling. Baptist schools are just so judgmental you know..? I feel bad talking about it with my current boyfriend because of our history. Basically I previously picked the abusive guy over the one I'm dating now which was obviously the wrong choice. But now we're together. So I feel like when I talk to him about my ex it's just bringing up terrible memories.

They can be judgemental all they want. Screw what they think. They have to provide you with the proper care. They cannot with hold counselling from you. Look into the insurance you receive from school. They should and will provide you with counselling. (In Canada counselling is 100% covered I found out that it's mandatory coverage but people don't know about it). Once you look into the insurance maybe take it off campus to a third party that will take the schools insurance.

It sounds like you have PTSD.

[subject99]

My nurse mother and her nurse friend told me I probably have it too.
I know for certain my school includes counseling in tuition. I saw a therapist at my doctors office twice but she wasn't helpful. And most of the problems landed on me not him. But this was before I admitted any of it. I am going to do myself and everyone around me a favor and see what I can do in that area. It's just up think of PTSD as a war hero or something. Not me.

Don't think of anyone but yourself. You are doing this for you. You are working on yourself and getting yourself better. It's your turn to be all about you. It is going to take time and lots of hard work. Just remember your doing this for you because you want better for yourself.

Find a therapist you are comfortable with, it might take. 2 or 3 but don't give up. Yes it's scary to open up. But that is what they are for. Don't be shy. Just blurt everything out. They are there to help and listen to you. It's all about you in that hour session or how ever long you need. They are not judging you. They are there listening to you.

[TaylorKnows]

My nurse mother and her nurse friend told me I probably have it too.
I know for certain my school includes counseling in tuition. I saw a therapist at my doctors office twice but she wasn't helpful. And most of the problems landed on me not him. But this was before I admitted any of it. I am going to do myself and everyone around me a favor and see what I can do in that area. It's just up think of PTSD as a war hero or something. Not me.

Ashley, I do hope you get help. PTSD can happen to anyone, it happens to children that were abused and neglected. And it does happen to abusive relationship victims. Try to find a counseling somewhere. One of my biggest regrets is never getting help and I had to heal on my own (and I'm still not fully healed). I know we went through two totally different things, but I do wish you the best of luck. I know it's corny, but I am here for you.

[blackbetty]

My nurse mother and her nurse friend told me I probably have it too.
I know for certain my school includes counseling in tuition. I saw a therapist at my doctors office twice but she wasn't helpful. And most of the problems landed on me not him. But this was before I admitted any of it. I am going to do myself and everyone around me a favor and see what I can do in that area. It's just up think of PTSD as a war hero or something. Not me.

I suffer from PTSD from my abusive relationship with my ex husband. Here for ya if you need to talk. PM me if you need to.

[MakeupGirly]

Sending you best wishes Ashley!

[Yue195]

It weird how people who never met each other, live in different parts of the world with different opinions and lifestyles can be a comforting support group.

Does anyone here watch American Horror Story?

[FLOSSY77]

This made me so sad last night cake. I don't have experience to help you. I just want you to be healthy and happy. I know it will take some time. And these things can be with you forever. Just let it make you stronger. Let someone love you. Even if he doesn't have all the answers.
Pm me your ex's info. I got a guy for this stuff. SHH.