Having just one child? Your thoughts?

[boredmamaneedsdrama]

Before having kids I wasn't sure how many I wanted. While I was pregnant I decided we were one and done. It was just too difficult on my body and I was not willing to do it again. My husband thought I was hormonal and would change my mind .
After my daughter was born I still only wanted one because she's my whole world and I like devoting my time to her. It just seemed perfect. The three of us.
Then one day, I just woke up and decided I needed another baby. Just like that. It was so strange. We obviously took a long time to think about it since I'd been sure for so long, but in the end it still felt right for us to have a second. I'm now pregnant

[wishes]

...Back again, with a 2 year old. I would love another for a sibling for my daughter but I don't think I could handle the infant stage again and the sleep deprivation due to night time feeding. Oh and my daughter was the angel baby; slept through the night, not fussy, etc. If we have another, I guarantee it will be the hellion child. We also would have to go through IUI again, which was successful the first time.. who knows if it'll be just as easy the second? I'm also 33, so time is not on our side especially when I had a difficult pregnancy the first time. Oy.

Hubby says no more because we could provide our daughter with a lot more and he couldn't handle me with an infant again

I'm only fearful of her being an only child when she is the sole person to make arrangements for her father and I when we're old, not having close family by (all her cousins are hours away), etc.

Ugh, so torn.