JesssFam: Facing Reality w/ Daiquiris & Taco Bell (Part 87)

[WheresMyCoffee]

I am pretty sure if he hadnt paid support in over a year, we would have heard.

[Captain Smooth]

Then he should pay child support instead of buying another ring.

We have no proof of him whether he gives child support now. The pics was screenshot last year. I won't jump on conclusion since neither of us know anything just because of a ring he gave recently, whether he is fully involved in the boys, or how the boys feel about Drake we will have a answer in the future...

I doubt he pays childsupport, if he does, I an imagine it's infrequent. The reason doesn't have to be, that he doesn't want to pay necessarily, but I imagine it's pretty hard to rake up the money to pay for three children, plus another at home and all the rest of the costs. I doubt he ever made enough to make ends meet, after he left Jess.

[notapnutmommy]

Then he should pay child support instead of buying another ring.

We have no proof of him whether he gives child support now. The pics was screenshot last year. I won't jump on conclusion since neither of us know anything just because of a ring he gave recently, whether he is fully involved in the boys, or how the boys feel about Drake we will have a answer in the future...

I doubt he pays childsupport, if he does, I an imagine it's infrequent. The reason doesn't have to be, that he doesn't want to pay necessarily, but I imagine it's pretty hard to rake up the money to pay for three children, plus another at home and all the rest of the costs. I doubt he ever made enough to make ends meet, after he left Jess.

If he can't make enough to make ends meet, he would not have been able to buy a house or a new ring for Natalie.
If he can afford to do those things, he can afford to pay his child support.

[pinkdiamond_3]

How do we know Drake and Natalie bought a house, anyway? Is that just speculation or was it posted somewhere?

[Yogabbagabbat]

How do we know Drake and Natalie bought a house, anyway? Is that just speculation or was it posted somewhere?

It was posted on here within the past 2 years

If I remember correctly it was a weird place...like it looked like an industrial garage lol

[sofreakingnotok]

If Drake has enough money to buy houses and rings but is somehow managing to not pay child support, I kinda want to believe Jess when she says that he is taking under the table jobs and that's how he gets away with it all. It makes sense.

[Captain Smooth]

I doubt he pays childsupport, if he does, I an imagine it's infrequent. The reason doesn't have to be, that he doesn't want to pay necessarily, but I imagine it's pretty hard to rake up the money to pay for three children, plus another at home and all the rest of the costs. I doubt he ever made enough to make ends meet, after he left Jess.

If he can't make enough to make ends meet, he would not have been able to buy a house or a new ring for Natalie.
If he can afford to do those things, he can afford to pay his child support.

Oh, I didn't know they bought a house. Allright, he may have (had?) no intention to pay then, if that's the case however.

[Maisie_Claire]

How do we know Drake and Natalie bought a house, anyway? Is that just speculation or was it posted somewhere?

It was posted on here within the past 2 years

If I remember correctly it was a weird place...like it looked like an industrial garage lol

I think that was where he was living when him and Natalie split I remember her vlogging herself picking up diapers or something.
One of the posters here that's friends with them on Facebook said they bought a house last April. Honestly with Natalie working 2 jobs she probably contributed a lot to the house, but still if you can't afford child support then you can't afford a ring.

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[Chellebailson27]

Bit of a personal post so feel free to skip but I have a son...who's 7 his dad cheated on me when I was pregnant he has never been involved in his sons life..he saw him a handful of times but never in a parent capacity,he has older children from a previous relationship and since I had our son he's been married and his wife's son has taken his last name, now I have never said to him he can't see his son,he chooses this,but I'm also not about to force him to have a relationship with his son,in my opinion it has to come from him,I would like to see him make an effort,I have never bashed him to my son either,it's always been him,his sister and I,our little team, so from Jess's point of view I get it, I truly can't understand why the other person who made those children with you,do not love them as fiercely as you do,I think the long and short of it is some people are just shitty people,I can honestly say if my ex came to me and asked to have a relationship with our son, (mediation required of course) I would still encourage it coz it's coming from him....and can only benefit my son to have both parents there...

Side note....it's taken me a long time to get to this point...I was very bitter for a time,but I had to suck it up coz I got little ones counting on me


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[nadsbliss]

I doubt he pays childsupport, if he does, I an imagine it's infrequent. The reason doesn't have to be, that he doesn't want to pay necessarily, but I imagine it's pretty hard to rake up the money to pay for three children, plus another at home and all the rest of the costs. I doubt he ever made enough to make ends meet, after he left Jess.

If he can't make enough to make ends meet, he would not have been able to buy a house or a new ring for Natalie.
If he can afford to do those things, he can afford to pay his child support.[/quote]

Yes I agreed, if he pays child support he won't give a lot to Jess either. He didn't want the twins and Landen in the first place and YouTube paid her alot he think she should be the one paying most of it. Drake always say she baby traps him.

I can see that Drake purposely plan Bella without Natalie knowing to get back on Jess, who will purposely send a text to his ex telling his current girlfriend is pregnant when Natalie wants to keep it private.

[whattheactual]

I doubt he pays childsupport, if he does, I an imagine it's infrequent. The reason doesn't have to be, that he doesn't want to pay necessarily, but I imagine it's pretty hard to rake up the money to pay for three children, plus another at home and all the rest of the costs. I doubt he ever made enough to make ends meet, after he left Jess.

If he can't make enough to make ends meet, he would not have been able to buy a house or a new ring for Natalie.
If he can afford to do those things, he can afford to pay his child support.

Yes I agreed, if he pays child support he won't give a lot to Jess either. He didn't want the twins and Landen in the first place and YouTube paid her alot he think she should be the one paying most of it. Drake always say she baby traps him.

I can see that Drake purposely plan Bella without Natalie knowing to get back on Jess, who will purposely send a text to his ex telling his current girlfriend is pregnant when Natalie wants to keep it private.[/quote]
If he didn't want kids he should have wrapped it up. I feel no pitty towards him about child support.

[violet-kelsey black]

I wonder how much Chris has to pay for C&T child support.


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[Captain Smooth]

Bit of a personal post so feel free to skip but I have a son...who's 7 his dad cheated on me when I was pregnant he has never been involved in his sons life..he saw him a handful of times but never in a parent capacity,he has older children from a previous relationship and since I had our son he's been married and his wife's son has taken his last name, now I have never said to him he can't see his son,he chooses this,but I'm also not about to force him to have a relationship with his son,in my opinion it has to come from him,I would like to see him make an effort,I have never bashed him to my son either,it's always been him,his sister and I,our little team, so from Jess's point of view I get it, I truly can't understand why the other person who made those children with you,do not love them as fiercely as you do,I think the long and short of it is some people are just shitty people,I can honestly say if my ex came to me and asked to have a relationship with our son, (mediation required of course) I would still encourage it coz it's coming from him....and can only benefit my son to have both parents there...

Side note....it's taken me a long time to get to this point...I was very bitter for a time,but I had to suck it up coz I got little ones counting on me


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I'd also say, if there is an active interest from the fathers side to get to know his child, even after he's been a deadbeat for a long time, try to encourage it as much as possible. It can only be good for the childs developement (provided there is no criminal record of violence, or other odd behaviour of course). I also never understood it. I mean, sure it's difficult splitting your time between work, family and other family, but it's worth the effort. Soon the children will be old enough to decide for themselves where and when they want to see you and they might come to you, when you're too busy to travel anywhere. Until then make the effort to come to them and enable them to know their mother and their father, so they can grow up as healthy as possible.

[Captain Smooth]

Do you guys think Jessica resents her dad for having another child after he left her family the same way she resents Drake for having another child right after he left her?

I don't think she resentes him in that sense, but I think she can relate to her Mother a little more, after also experiencing a life with a cheating husband that leaves while your children are still little.
I think she also carries a lot of subconscious baggage with her, which she doesn't fully realize. Her driven desire for a happy ever after, with a husband that's going to love her forever is one result of that. I could be totally off, but considering that marriage still is a big issue in the US, she might have seen a lot of classmates with both their parents still together, while she always had to explain that her Dad, was actually her stepdad and that her parents are divorced. So she tries to recreate what she missed as a child, by always making her current husband/boyfriend not only a fatherfigure, but a Daddyfigure, as if there is no other Dad, you just have one, like everybody else.

Allright I'm very philosophical today, but I'm sick at the moment and have lots of time to think

[Yue195]

Do you guys think Jessica resents her dad for having another child after he left her family the same way she resents Drake for having another child right after he left her?

I don't think she resentes him in that sense, but I think she can relate to her Mother a little more, after also experiencing a life with a cheating husband that leaves while your children are still little.
I think she also carries a lot of subconscious baggage with her, which she doesn't fully realize. Her driven desire for a happy ever after, with a husband that's going to love her forever is one result of that. I could be totally off, but considering that marriage still is a big issue in the US, she might have seen a lot of classmates with both their parents still together, while she always had to explain that her Dad, was actually her stepdad and that her parents are divorced. So she tries to recreate what she missed as a child, by always making her current husband/boyfriend not only a fatherfigure, but a Daddyfigure, as if there is no other Dad, you just have one, like everybody else.

Allright I'm very philosophical today, but I'm sick at the moment and have lots of time to think

I politely disagree. In both relationships she has brought up Vasectomy. She wanted Drake to get one done after Landen (which he obviously didn't ) and now she's talking about Chris getting one. So personally I believe she does hold some resentment towards her dad having 'another' family especially since she wasn't so hunky dory about her half siblings/blended family until Chris showed up and suddenly it was great. Another example is that her Dad has a J name (Jeffery I think) , Lilia has her and Wendy middle name, Kyson has his paternal grandfathers name, Landen has Jess's step dads, but John is just a name in the family and Kaden has that.

[Midia]

Bit of a personal post so feel free to skip but I have a son...who's 7 his dad cheated on me when I was pregnant he has never been involved in his sons life..he saw him a handful of times but never in a parent capacity,he has older children from a previous relationship and since I had our son he's been married and his wife's son has taken his last name, now I have never said to him he can't see his son,he chooses this,but I'm also not about to force him to have a relationship with his son,in my opinion it has to come from him,I would like to see him make an effort,I have never bashed him to my son either,it's always been him,his sister and I,our little team, so from Jess's point of view I get it, I truly can't understand why the other person who made those children with you,do not love them as fiercely as you do,I think the long and short of it is some people are just shitty people,I can honestly say if my ex came to me and asked to have a relationship with our son, (mediation required of course) I would still encourage it coz it's coming from him....and can only benefit my son to have both parents there...

Side note....it's taken me a long time to get to this point...I was very bitter for a time,but I had to suck it up coz I got little ones counting on me


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I'd also say, if there is an active interest from the fathers side to get to know his child, even after he's been a deadbeat for a long time, try to encourage it as much as possible. It can only be good for the childs developement (provided there is no criminal record of violence, or other odd behaviour of course). I also never understood it. I mean, sure it's difficult splitting your time between work, family and other family, but it's worth the effort. Soon the children will be old enough to decide for themselves where and when they want to see you and they might come to you, when you're too busy to travel anywhere. Until then make the effort to come to them and enable them to know their mother and their father, so they can grow up as healthy as possible.

I don't know how I would feel in this situation to have my child's father not taking care of our child for years, then one day he decides to be part of it and it's ok...? I don't know if I would trust him enough with my child "mental health/balance" if you see what I mean, who knows if he won't change his mind and leave again, then how is my child is going to feel??
I also want to react to the comment that it can only benefit your child (Chellebailson27) to have both his parents, I am saying this from personnal experience as the child I was, yes having two parents is good if they are 2 good and responsible parents, I have one good parent -my mom- and another who cared about me and my sisters when he felt like it and it was horrible (he was doing that even before my parent separated and he is still doing that), I would have prefered to only have one parent who cares the 2 including one who always proved his needs came above his own children, (e were not important enough) I stop every contact with my father when my parents separated but that's the one reproach I had towards my mother, she wanted us to have our father even if emotionnally we would have been better without one (my situation is obviously not the same as yours but I am just advising you to be careful I guess)

Do you guys think Jessica resents her dad for having another child after he left her family the same way she resents Drake for having another child right after he left her?

I don't think she resentes him in that sense, but I think she can relate to her Mother a little more, after also experiencing a life with a cheating husband that leaves while your children are still little.
I think she also carries a lot of subconscious baggage with her, which she doesn't fully realize. Her driven desire for a happy ever after, with a husband that's going to love her forever is one result of that. I could be totally off, but considering that marriage still is a big issue in the US, she might have seen a lot of classmates with both their parents still together, while she always had to explain that her Dad, was actually her stepdad and that her parents are divorced. So she tries to recreate what she missed as a child, by always making her current husband/boyfriend not only a fatherfigure, but a Daddyfigure, as if there is no other Dad, you just have one, like everybody else.

Allright I'm very philosophical today, but I'm sick at the moment and have lots of time to think

Damn, you went deep I don't know if she resents her dads but I think she has this dream of the perfect "mom, dad and happy kids" family which evoluated (because of everything that happened) to "mom, dads, stepdad, stepmoms, happy children" family mess...

[Captain Smooth]

Do you guys think Jessica resents her dad for having another child after he left her family the same way she resents Drake for having another child right after he left her?

I don't think she resentes him in that sense, but I think she can relate to her Mother a little more, after also experiencing a life with a cheating husband that leaves while your children are still little.
I think she also carries a lot of subconscious baggage with her, which she doesn't fully realize. Her driven desire for a happy ever after, with a husband that's going to love her forever is one result of that. I could be totally off, but considering that marriage still is a big issue in the US, she might have seen a lot of classmates with both their parents still together, while she always had to explain that her Dad, was actually her stepdad and that her parents are divorced. So she tries to recreate what she missed as a child, by always making her current husband/boyfriend not only a fatherfigure, but a Daddyfigure, as if there is no other Dad, you just have one, like everybody else.

Allright I'm very philosophical today, but I'm sick at the moment and have lots of time to think

I politely disagree. In both relationships she has brought up Vasectomy. She wanted Drake to get one done after Landen (which he obviously didn't ) and now she's talking about Chris getting one. So personally I believe she does hold some resentment towards her dad having 'another' family especially since she wasn't so hunky dory about her half siblings/blended family until Chris showed up and suddenly it was great. Another example is that her Dad has a J name (Jeffery I think) , Lilia has her and Wendy middle name, Kyson has his paternal grandfathers name, Landen has Jess's step dads, but John is just a name in the family and Kaden has that.

Oh, I didn't make my point very clear, I didn't mean she doesn't resent him. I meant she doesn't know she does, you know what I mean? If you'd ask her, she probably would say no, she loves him and the past is the past, but deep down she's unhappy with her childhood, so she tries to compansate by her actions (vasectomy must-haves included).

[Captain Smooth]

I'd also say, if there is an active interest from the fathers side to get to know his child, even after he's been a deadbeat for a long time, try to encourage it as much as possible. It can only be good for the childs developement (provided there is no criminal record of violence, or other odd behaviour of course). I also never understood it. I mean, sure it's difficult splitting your time between work, family and other family, but it's worth the effort. Soon the children will be old enough to decide for themselves where and when they want to see you and they might come to you, when you're too busy to travel anywhere. Until then make the effort to come to them and enable them to know their mother and their father, so they can grow up as healthy as possible.

I don't know how I would feel in this situation to have my child's father not taking care of our child for years, then one day he decides to be part of it and it's ok...? I don't know if I would trust him enough with my child "mental health/balance" if you see what I mean, who knows if he won't change his mind and leave again, then how is my child is going to feel??
I also want to react to the comment that it can only benefit your child (Chellebailson27) to have both his parents, I am saying this from personnal experience as the child I was, yes having two parents is good if they are 2 good and responsible parents, I have one good parent -my mom- and another who cared about me and my sisters when he felt like it and it was horrible (he was doing that even before my parent separated and he is still doing that), I would have prefered to only have one parent who cares the 2 including one who always proved his needs came above his own children, (e were not important enough) I stop every contact with my father when my parents separated but that's the one reproach I had towards my mother, she wanted us to have our father even if emotionnally we would have been better without one (my situation is obviously not the same as yours but I am just advising you to be careful I guess)

I don't think she resentes him in that sense, but I think she can relate to her Mother a little more, after also experiencing a life with a cheating husband that leaves while your children are still little.
I think she also carries a lot of subconscious baggage with her, which she doesn't fully realize. Her driven desire for a happy ever after, with a husband that's going to love her forever is one result of that. I could be totally off, but considering that marriage still is a big issue in the US, she might have seen a lot of classmates with both their parents still together, while she always had to explain that her Dad, was actually her stepdad and that her parents are divorced. So she tries to recreate what she missed as a child, by always making her current husband/boyfriend not only a fatherfigure, but a Daddyfigure, as if there is no other Dad, you just have one, like everybody else.

Allright I'm very philosophical today, but I'm sick at the moment and have lots of time to think

Damn, you went deep I don't know if she resents her dads but I think she has this dream of the perfect "mom, dad and happy kids" family which evoluated (because of everything that happened) to "mom, dads, stepdad, stepmoms, happy children" family mess...

That's true, I didn't take the kids feelings into account. Of course, if it doesn't work and I'd realize, that my child doesn't really come around to the Dad suddenly being part of it's life, I would not encourage it too much, but I personally know many kids (grown up now) who feel rather abandoned, because their Dad/Mom is not an active part of their life, so they try to reach out and impress them, but there is hardly anything coming back. So if you can, try at least, when the father is willing, doesn't mean it has to stay like that forever, just try it out and see how it goes.

To Jess: Yeah, things did not go according to plan, but everybody always wondered what it is with her and her constant refering to Chris and fromaly Drake as Dad and I felt that this weird behaviour might come from her wish she would only have one babydaddy and her kids could seem "normal" to outsiders.

[Chellebailson27]

I don't know how I would feel in this situation to have my child's father not taking care of our child for years, then one day he decides to be part of it and it's ok...? I don't know if I would trust him enough with my child "mental health/balance" if you see what I mean, who knows if he won't change his mind and leave again, then how is my child is going to feel??
I also want to react to the comment that it can only benefit your child (Chellebailson27) to have both his parents, I am saying this from personnal experience as the child I was, yes having two parents is good if they are 2 good and responsible parents, I have one good parent -my mom- and another who cared about me and my sisters when he felt like it and it was horrible (he was doing that even before my parent separated and he is still doing that), I would have prefered to only have one parent who cares the 2 including one who always proved his needs came above his own children, (e were not important enough) I stop every contact with my father when my parents separated but that's the one reproach I had towards my mother, she wanted us to have our father even if emotionnally we would have been better without one (my situation is obviously not the same as yours but I am just advising you to be careful I guess)


Do not get me wrong I do not forgive and forget so easily,I think it's more of a case it's been 7 years he lives 20 minutes away I don't actually see it happening,I mean for anything to progress he would have to come to me (not likely) and prove to me he was serious,coz I'm not going to beg anyone to be in my sons life, my son is awesome,it just makes me sad to think in the future he may feel like HE wasn't good enough (that's the part that breaks my heart a little) so my thought process of it benefitting my son is so HE doesn't EVER feel like he was not good enough...Which is why I'm still single 7 years on,(iv had dates and stuff) but the thought of bringing a revolving door of men into my kids lives,let alone marrying them and popping out a few more children I think that's the kind of selfishness that mess up your kids,I don't know if it's coz Jess felt her kids need a 'dad' or she's scared of being alone,it makes me cringe


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[Midia]

I don't know how I would feel in this situation to have my child's father not taking care of our child for years, then one day he decides to be part of it and it's ok...? I don't know if I would trust him enough with my child "mental health/balance" if you see what I mean, who knows if he won't change his mind and leave again, then how is my child is going to feel??
I also want to react to the comment that it can only benefit your child (Chellebailson27) to have both his parents, I am saying this from personnal experience as the child I was, yes having two parents is good if they are 2 good and responsible parents, I have one good parent -my mom- and another who cared about me and my sisters when he felt like it and it was horrible (he was doing that even before my parent separated and he is still doing that), I would have prefered to only have one parent who cares the 2 including one who always proved his needs came above his own children, (e were not important enough) I stop every contact with my father when my parents separated but that's the one reproach I had towards my mother, she wanted us to have our father even if emotionnally we would have been better without one (my situation is obviously not the same as yours but I am just advising you to be careful I guess)


Do not get me wrong I do not forgive and forget so easily,I think it's more of a case it's been 7 years he lives 20 minutes away I don't actually see it happening,I mean for anything to progress he would have to come to me (not likely) and prove to me he was serious,coz I'm not going to beg anyone to be in my sons life, my son is awesome,it just makes me sad to think in the future he may feel like HE wasn't good enough (that's the part that breaks my heart a little) so my thought process of it benefitting my son is so HE doesn't EVER feel like he was not good enough...Which is why I'm still single 7 years on,(iv had dates and stuff) but the thought of bringing a revolving door of men into my kids lives,let alone marrying them and popping out a few more children I think that's the kind of selfishness that mess up your kids,I don't know if it's coz Jess felt her kids need a 'dad' or she's scared of being alone,it makes me cringe


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I see what you mean and I actually felt like I wasn't good enough when I was younger but that's not something I feel now because I always had my amazing mom to tell me otherwise and when I grew up with her supporting me in everything despite my father attitude I started to understand that the problem didn't come from me but from my father and now I definitly don't feel like I am not good enough. I won't deny that when I see how close some of my friends are with their dad, I am a little sad to not have that but my mom is so amazing she balances this feelings and because i lived this situation i feel like I will be more careful about "chosing" my future children's father than I would have been otherwise even if i may have some little trust issues with men (but that's life!). So all that to say, I get your fear about you child feeling like he is not enough because of hid father but you being here, taking care of him and putting him first will prove him he is good enough as my mom proved it to me

And yes I agree about Jess, I don't get how she can just go from one man to another so quicly especially when she has children, personally I would be scared to not trust them with my kids (she never knew Drake or Chris for long before living with them) and so many changes in her children life must be perturbing ( I am thinking of Lilia who when through 2 stepdad and I don't know how many houses...)