Phil and Alex | Part 1

[maggielim]

GOD HAS ALWAYS TOLD THESE PEOPLE TO ADOPT.


the fact they cant see this is insane. do they realize how rare their adoptions are!? my parents adopted my bother back in the late 90s and i remember them telling me that they'd adopt but my brother didn't come until 2 years later and both my parents were dentists. we had a comfortable life. both my parents worked. on top of the fact my brother was 5 months when we got him. yet these two barely have jobs and they've managed to have two adoptions (from newborn age) VERY close together with the same rare circumstances.

[maggielim]

ive never adopted personally but ive seen it first hand. my best friend went through hell because the process is so long. took forever for the paperwork, they sat idle with no calls or situations, they finally get one and the mom changed her mind 2 weeks before being induced.

yet these two get two babies handed to them and they're ungrateful

[missy777]

tbh i hated being pregnant. this storybook image is not true in most cases. i was sick every day. My labor was awful. I am scared to try for my second baby as i really hated it (love my son of course)

if her body is not safely able to carry a pregnancy then she needs to accept that. look at providing a better life for the 2 daughters she already has.

[missy777]

Omg she just posted on Twitter that her hcg came back good and the pa to her doctor said they are still in this and still fighting... wtf?

[maggielim]

personally, i dont see anything wrong with the instagram comments alex was ranting about on twitter.

i don't think its wrong. i think its constructive criticism. it looks like it'll be one of their only few options left. if they want this big family, they'll need to do it the way fate planned or lay down and accept that they'll have only two children. alex isn't getting any younger and your chances decrease naturally as you age, i cant imagine what they'd be like when you already suffer from infertility prior.

those tweets were sort of pathetic. i feel for alex, i really do but even she's said it herself in her insta story, "at this point it'll be a miracle" she really needs to grieve not having bio children so they can move on and build their family. she's holding phil up at this point. can you imagine not caring if your kids were biological and then having this wife who's obsessed with the idea, she's holding her family up because of of genetics and 9 months.

[missy777]

Scratch that - it was her doctor herself who said they are still in this! Good lord...

[maggielim]

tbh i hated being pregnant. this storybook image is not true in most cases. i was sick every day. My labor was awful. I am scared to try for my second baby as i really hated it (love my son of course)

if her body is not safely able to carry a pregnancy then she needs to accept that. look at providing a better life for the 2 daughters she already has.

hell, same. i didnt even know i was pregnant for most of my pregnancy. didnt get sick. didn't have symptoms. im relatively tall so i didnt show, just bloated. i found out a week before turning 4 months. luckily i dont drink and everything turned out okay but by the time i found out, i was done with the majority. yikes. edit: i was 19, dumb and freshly married.

[prettyll]

Didn’t she have an ultrasound today? I thought they weren’t checking her hcg anymore?


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[maggielim]

they're already struggling with this pregnancy and they haven't even been able to see baby (like actual baby, not embryo pics) on a ultrasound. this might be a long ride for them

[rd_valo]

She said they see a larger sack but no yolk. What does that mean?

It means theres a good chance there is an issue. I’ve had many miscarriages and many early ultrasounds and the ones where nothing was showing by six weeks ended up in miscarriage for me. They should be able to see the fetal pole at least by this stage. Suggests that the baby isn’t developing as it should.



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[AquaticSquiglet]

someone on instagram posted this comment about how god is telling them to adopt and saying no to pregnancy. its totally the wrong time to say it, even if i happen to agree. I think that's what prompted the tweets from their twitter.

Oh and this doctor... i just can't with her.

I think it’s actually because of their Twitter following. I’ve seen several people who have just been kindly saying, prepare for disappointment, because it doesn’t look good, and this one girl in particular comments back saying “do you have a medical background” and other ridiculous stuff.

[Schnatterinchen]

Hello, I´m new to this site and sorry for my bad english, but I have some questions.

For what I understood they have a foundation and now they live on donations - from that foundation ?
Isn´t that embezzlement ?

And he decided to quit his job as a pastor to live from the money (donations) of others ?

When somebody takes (I don´t wanna say steals) money from an foundation and quits his/her job how can I be sure that this person wasn´t fired from embezzling church money, too ?

[Mommy359]

Alex said her HCG is over 1600. This pregnancy is very confusing to say the least. I hope it all works out.

[No_Sugarcoating11]

Alex said her HCG is over 1600. This pregnancy is very confusing to say the least. I hope it all works out.

It is confusing. It looks like it took almost a week to double though.

[marsala]

Marsala- nobody here wishes them ill will or not to have a successful pregnancy. The issues lie with how they act prior to them getting pregnant. I genuinely hope they have a successful pregnancy. And in many adoption circles, they count their adoptions as a way of saying they beat infertility. They have children which at the end of the day is the goal. Beating infertility doesn't necessarily mean you've gotten pregnant and gave birth full term to biological children.

They were financially capable, however things have changed in the last several months. Alex rarely works norm would be to see her work 3 12 hour shifts per week. And phil quit his job as a pastor to start the charity and they've admitted they are living on donations. That is not financially responsible.

Oh, I know nobody wants that. It's just that I often see posts I disagree with regarding how much they would love a bio child vs. Kinsley and Callie, or whether they have beaten infertility through adoption. I think these are sensitive topics, and everyone has an opinion, but I think people can be harsh sometimes, that's all. Maybe to them they have not beaten infertility until now, and personally I think that's a reasonable view to take.

We don't know their financial situation. I agree that they have made, IMO, bad decisions, but they go on living life seemingly normally. They still buy expensive, organic food, and Alex does still work. Maybe they're racking up a ton of debt, we don't know, but maybe their parents help them out, maybe YT makes them more than we think, etc. I do think Phil needs to start working again, like I said. If this pregnancy by some miracle sticks and results in a live birth, Alex should/will obviously cut back on work but even if not and they keep trying, she probably will wind up still cutting back due to the stress on her body and IMO Phil needs to step up to the plate. I think it's irresponsible to rely on YT income alone, I think YT should supplement real jobs for adults, especially those with families.

[maggielim]

Hello, I´m new to this site and sorry for my bad english, but I have some questions.

For what I understood they have a foundation and now they live on donations - from that foundation ?
Isn´t that embezzlement ?

And he decided to quit his job as a pastor to live from the money (donations) of others ?

When somebody takes (I don´t wanna say steals) money from an foundation and quits his/her job how can I be sure that this person wasn´t fired from embezzling church money, too ?

took a class about this back in college. basically if its a non profit organization they cant have a salary. especially if it's a small organization like theirs. that would mean that the only revenue is coming from donations and they can't have a salary out of the donations. in order for them to receive a salary it would 1. need to be much larger and successful proving that there's a need for employees (other than its founders Phil and Alex) in order to keep it running. 2. would need to receive enough donations to actually sustain multiple salaries and sustain its "non profit" status as a real non profit. basically it's the irs's call the if the irs considers benefits "excessive' depends on the situation. example, a staff member earning $100,000 annually from a non profit organization with a budget of $125,000 probably needs to worry, but someone earning $100,000 from a nonprofit with a $5 million budget probably doesn't.

basically since their organization is small, they shouldn't get a salary and if they do, it would need to be significantly lower than the donations and budget. but since they're small and starting out, ALL incoming donation and revenue should go directly to the organization. especially if investors are involved. its illegal for them to take a salary from a small organization like theirs. it would be embezzlement and it would be VERY CLEAR embezzlement. Edit: UNLESS the investors set money aside for them to have a salary like if for some reason, they decided to donate 20000 to them as a "salary" they'll most likely likely have a non profit buisness tab or whatever but it would need to be for the organization's inquiries, not their grocery fund and rent money.

basically sounds like they're trying to quit working and live off of subscriber donations by painting themselves as "all in" for this organization hoping someone will donate to them specifically

[eab424]

Alex said her HCG is over 1600. This pregnancy is very confusing to say the least. I hope it all works out.

It is confusing. It looks like it took almost a week to double though.

My friend has done several IVF/FET attempts and she would get "pregnant" according to the numbers but they were bare minimum. The numbers didn't go anywhere and she'd miscarry yet the numbers woudn't go down. The fact they can't see the yolk is very concerning since that's what the pregnancy feeds on before the placenta is formed. I feel like this pregnancy isn't viable and someone is drawing it out unnecessarily

[RecklessDisregard]

It's been a common trend for them to title a video with something clickbaitish and then change the title not long after people start making negative comments lol. Why can't they just title it right the first time?

I'm pretty sure that the number of clicks they get on each vlog, like right after it gets published, is a major factor in determining whether they get any traction in nonsubscribers' Recommended Videos sidebars. Without more-popular YouTubers ("friends") promoting them, this is likely their best shot at getting exposure to new viewers. It's not the very classiest strategy, but from a numbers-management perspective, it probably works. They know that their die-hard fans will watch the video no matter what the title is, and they're trying to mitigate the angry response of non-ubers by changing the title once that magic window of opportunity closes (and once there's no longer anything substantial to gain from clickbaiting). To the best of my knowledge, YT has never disclosed exactly how long this window lasts, and I'd guess that the reasons are 1) it may be adjusted frequently, and/or 2) they really don't want to encourage a "Clickbait and Switch" strategy like P+A seem to be using here.

I don't love the way I feel about myself when I speculate about YT pregnancies... But I feel OK saying that it's just batshit crazy that they put themselves through this process (and the expeeeeeeeeeense) without having tested the embryos, which may not be very good quality. I get the philosophy, about giving each embryo its "chance," but damn... This is real life, with real stakes, and they're doing it in the most public way possible.

It's not illegal for them to draw a salary from the nonprofit. Even if it is a small nonprofit - which obviously we know that's the case. It's not considered embezzlement, or legally dicey, provided the documentation is all in order. There is a clause stating that 503c orgs should not be for the benefit of private entities, and that can seem confusing, because it kind of sounds similar to saying that private entities can't benefit from them, which of course they can. To illustrate the difference - if Love Multiplies were a nonprofit corporation created to support the Congelliere family in their lifestyle and endeavors, that would be bad, and their application for 503c designation would be denied, and they would end up in a heap of legal trouble. BUT, Love Multiplies will "encourage healthy families," and is run by Phil C, who collects a salary for his efforts. This boils down to semantics, like everything else based on the law, and my guess is that P+A did at least consult an attorney before upending their financial lives. The guidelines for determining what a nonprofit can pay out in salary are loose to borderline non-existent. Many say that not only CAN you pay yourself for your work in starting a nonprofit, but you SHOULD, and that this is a new/modern form of missionary work, which I am 100% sure is how Phil sees it in any case. By setting a vague and ridiculous mission, they can do practically anything (or nothing) and still be considered to be encouraging healthy families. Even posting on his social media ("go to my Twitter to get encouraged!") or producing YT content can be said to fit that bill. But if they want to retain their reputation, it might be a good idea for them to help someone. Else. For a change. (Other than their fertility doctor)

All of that last paragraph should not be taken to mean I condone this charity BS. It's a bullshit mission statement with greedy intent, and I think it's trashy as hell to forego gainful employment while trying to have more children. Irresponsible. Just not illegal, not really even questionable. The philosophy is that he's chosen to devote his time to this 503c, but his time still has value, and as long as he's not grossly overpaying himself (relative to other CEOs and his prior income), he'll probably be fine. Which is absolutely galling to watch, while I struggle financially myself, but we can't all be YouTube-fabulous and minimally employed.

Re: possible embezzlement from the church. I really doubt it. They live very public lives, and there's nothing online to suggest this is true. It would be hard to live that down.

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/rebecca- ... 09074.html

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/get-really ... on-profit/

https://www.quora.com/How-much-can-I-pa ... -nonprofit

[Mommy359]

Does anyone wonder if P+A’s new friendship with Myka and James has anything to do with P+A hoping to get them on board with the love multiplies. Maybe they wanted them to donate towards it or become a silent partner. Anyone else?

[maggielim]

Does anyone wonder if P+A’s new friendship with Myka and James has anything to do with P+A hoping to get them on board with the love multiplies. Maybe they wanted them to donate towards it or become a silent partner. Anyone else?

i doubt it. they have four kids, why would they donate to a non profit that's barely functioning. they're also in ohio. plus, i have a feeling myka might either a. get pregnant again or b. adopt again.

i have a feeling they met up because alex has questions about homeschooling and their mutual experience with previously adopting/myka Getting her first child via adoption this year.